AIBU to shrivel up and die of embarrassment?

[redbusbeepbeep]

I am quite honestly never going to get over this. It was my birthday yesterday and as my partner works away he arranged for something to be sent to the house, along with flowers and a helium balloon.

A few weeks ago we had a leak from the bathroom, pretty bad, leaking down the walls and through our light sockets. The plumber came and fixed the leak, however 2 days later it’s leaking again, no where near as bad luckily as we caught it in time. He comes again and haven’t had an issue since.

Today I’m sat having a coffee and I notice a patch around the same area. Furious I phone the plumber to tell him the problem STILL isn’t sorted and he needs to come back as soon as possible, as I’m meeting friends in another city at lunch time and I wouldn’t dare leave it like that.

Plumber comes, it’s not a fucking leak, it’s the shadow from the helium balloon.

Years ago I thought I could hear a scratching in my car. A few weeks went by and I thought nothing more of it. We were having an Easter egg donation at work. I went to the local Tesco and bought a really nice egg and put it in the boot of my car. Next day gave the egg still in the bag. 10 minutes later the lady organising the donations came over to my desk and showed me a half eaten egg complete with mouse droppings. I was horrified. The penny dropped that I must have had a mouse in my boot.

Did similar a few weeks ago
Was on the phone to a call centre. Was asked if I could recreate the fault - prompt random trying to sound like a maglock door system disconnecting from the mains from me 😱
He informed me he is not an engineer and had no idea what the noises ment. Hopefully the engineer would help

Sorry to disappoint but I’ve never been so embarrassed in my whole life

We were on holiday in Portugal when DD was a toddler & came out in a rash. I had no idea if it was heat stroke, an allergy or something else. I knew there had been cases of chicken pox at her nursery so I wanted to rule that out. We went to a pharmacy where I tried to explain the situation. I speak no Portuguese and the pharmacist spoke very little English so I did my best impression of a chicken. From the facial expression of the pharmacist and the other customers, I quickly gathered that, whatever the Portuguese is for chicken pox, it doesn’t include the word for chicken or, indeed, any other bird.

This is the best one yet!!! Although I’m surprised she could even eat after having had two teeth removed!

I once drove 30 miles to return a furby that had stopped working the day after it was bought. The woman popped in new batteries and it sprung into action. I had no idea it was so power hungry! 😮

My friends and I had been to a day festival many years ago and were all somewhat the worse for wear after drinking all day. We finally got back to my flat where we were all staying the night and I couldn't find the keys. We were all so tired that we decided to just sleep in the communal hallway (it wasn't a fancy block of flats that had a locked door to the communal space).
It was so uncomfortable but we did fall asleep eventually. I used my bag as a makeshift pillow but it wasn't comfy. We were woken in the morning by neighbours I'd never spoken to before having to climb over us to get out to go to work. So embarrassing! I lived there for another couple of years and never spoke to the neighbour again!
And yes, obviously, the keys were in my bag!

Another household one:

We live in a really hard water area and all our appliances were always getting ruined by limescale so we decided to get an expensive plumbed in water softener when we had our kitchen renovated and hoped this would finally be the answer. We put salt in it and there were lights on the display and it made a noise but it made no bloody difference at all to the limescale so we assumed it was just shit and a bad investment

Then 3 YEARS after we’d had it installed I finally got around to googling ‘why is my water softener not working’ and found out there is a little tap at the back that was switched to ‘off’ and meant it was actually being bypassed and no water was going through. As soon as I switched it to ‘on’ the difference was immediately obvious. I used my normal amount of shampoo in the shower next day and it was like an Ibiza foam party!

This is brilliant 😂

I took my 8 year old DD to the doctor after discovering lumps on her spine which were new and had not been there in the bath the night before. Doctor asked where the lumps were and I duly pointed them out only to be told it was just her spine. Got out a model of a skeleton and made me feel the spine so I knew what one felt like for future reference , mortified.

And another one! Got home from backpacking round Thailand for months. Was living in a house share at the time. Went to bed as soon as I got home as it was about 5am.
There was an odd blue light coming from the hallway and it was stopping me from sleeping so I got up to see if someone had left a light on or something. Couldn't find anything so why back to bed. The light was brighter! Still couldn't sleep and it was really bugging me. I got up and down repeatedly, waking up others that lived there. They were pissed off with me!
The light kept getting brighter and I was so confused. After about an hour of this it suddenly dawned on me that it was the sky turning blue as it was dawn!!

I rang the GP for an appointment because there was blood in my wee.

I’d eaten beetroot the day before…

Ha, I remember that!! Brilliant!!

Omg, that's hilarious 😂

Lolling!

A few years ago I left the house one morning to find that my car wasn’t outside. After some anxious walking up and down the street I called the police to give a statement and report the car stolen. The following day I remembered that I had parked it elsewhere 😳.

@redbusbeepbeep the best bit is it sounds like you were pretty cross with the electrician and laid it on thick about the urgency 😂.

I hope your DH is contrite about giving you a birthday present that has lead directly to you having to emigrate.

I complained to the service advisor that my reverse sensors (beep) weren't working.
He explained the reason they weren't working was because my car didn't have any.

Hahahaha! Oh God OP, I'm cringing for you! Buy him a nice box of biccies and I'm sure he'll forgive you.

I once had the AA out as my car suddenly started making a disturbing whirring noise as I was driving along. It turned out to be a 'Light up wand' (Halloween pumpkin flavoured) that one of the kids had left in the car, something rolled on it which depressed the button and it was buzzing away to itself. Mortifying.

I love this! Thank you 😂

Tap had been running at a trickle for some time - have a lovely lodger who didn't mention but I'd noticed. Called in plumber - yep - limescale in the aerator which `I could have screwed off and fixed myself = total embarrassment and 60 quid down

Another one! Bought an expensive weather station for my then partner. Bloody thing constantly said either there was thunder due, or that it was raining heavily or about to.

Took it back to the shop to complain. Guy set it up, it showed the normal weather. Took it back home, immediately it said thunder again. Took it back to the shop and complained a little louder. Same thing happened again, but the guy took pity on me and swapped it for a new one. Took it home, set it up and it said thunder!

I took it back, complained louder, got my money back. Weeks later we discovered a tiny leak in the kitchen had been dripping for months and soaked our house and seeped into next door as well. Had to move out for a week to have the floor replaced and the walls sorted! The weather station was picking up all the humidity in the house but we didn't realise!! Doh.

I've got a Triumph motorbike, which I've had for 4 years. I was due to take my daughter on a summer holiday trip, long distance, a few weeks ago and went to fill it up - but couldn't undo the old fashioned style petrol cap. It just turned and turned and turned.

I assumed that it was an old fashioned, unlockable cap. I fiddled with it endlessly and accidentally found a disc which moved, to reveal a keyhole. On trying to unlock it and turn it, it just made a clicking noise and scared of damaging it, I turned the key and pushed the disc cover back.

I called the dealer and they said to come over, the fuel indicator said 5 miles and they are 18 miles away... I rode over very carefully and I explained to the bloke, who put the key in ad turned it, whilst it made the clicking noise ... and came out. There was a petrol station 100 yards up the road - he said that if it wouldn't start, he'd push it for me. It did make it to the station.

I've been riding motorbikes for 30 years and have diagnosed and fixed loads of problems, including dismantling, repairing and rebuilding several engines.

I used to park my car in a residential area when I went to work to avoid paying parking fees. I always parked in the same space but one day, I had to park somewhere else as it wasnt free. It was on a back street but not blocking anything or illegal.

I finish work and come back to the car to find it missing. I started panicking thinking it had been stolen. Then I thought...maybe the people living in the house has had it towed?

I knock on the door and this Asian lady who could not speak much English answered. I tried to explain why I had knocked on but she didn't understand much and looked quite confused. I started crying thinking where the hell is the car!! As I am crying and trying to explain as best I can, I notice my car in the corner of my eye.

I had bloody parked it in a different space!!

I ran off sharpish and never parked in that area again!! I was so embarrassed I accused this woman of getting my car towed!!!

This one has made me snort and wheeze 😄