How would your husband react to this way of attempting intimacy?

[Klarr]

Dh, kids and I are on holiday with my sister, her husband and children. It’s been lovely. Villa abroad. The kids occupy themselves and the adults get to lounge around the pool/play tennis/take it in turns to go out and about. No one is stressed as it’s pretty easy and relaxed.

Anyway, today I saw DH being really great with the kids - he just sorted everyone out today with breakfast and making sure the kids had all the stuff they needed for today’s big activity. We were ahead of schedule and just milling around.

I was just wanting to show my dh some affection if you know what I mean. So to get a bit of privacy in the bedroom I told dh his mum (who lives abroad to us all) was FaceTimeing on the kids tablet in our room and I couldn’t bring it to him as it was low battery and needing charging. Anyway, he got really annoyed and rejected me when he found out I was making the phone call up and just trying to get a few mins with him alone. Am I crazy that most men would not care AT ALL that I white lied in this scenario.

We moved past it but I just feel really rejected

He thought he was going to speak to his mum… not normally something that then turns instantly into sex!
I think I’d have just whispered something suggestive in his ear rather than lie about his mum

Honey, your mums on the kids tablet 🤣🤣

Was he worried something was wrong with his mum? I can see him perhaps thinking you were trying to get him away from the kids as there was something she wanted to tell him / about her that she or you wouldn’t want the kids to overhear. Might have panicked him a bit.

Either way, there were probably better ways of getting him away to come with you but does sound like an overreaction on his part.

My DPs mum is dead so he'd know shes not facetiming him 😬

In all seriousness it would depend on his mood tbh. If he had something on his mind he'd probably be pissed off.

How id probably take it - I'd be seriously fucked off if I'd had a busy day being all entertaining and organised n shit and then DP made up some bollocks about my mum being on the phone just to get his piece of needy attention from me too.

If I’d invoked a FaceTime with his mum in an attempt to seduce my DP he’d think I’d gone start raving mad 😂

Could he have been worried because his mum wouldn't normally have FT'd spontaneously? Or is he a stickler for truth and didn't like the white lie in principle? It does seem a little elaborate and calculated rather than just saying "please come into the bedroom; I need to show you something". Anyway, only he can tell you.

My husband would be absolutely delighted and clamber on immediately

Not only was his mind on his mum which would have been a passion killer, it sounds like the villa was full of kids and his in laws? Maybe he was worried someone would burst in.

So you wanted to do it while everyone was awake in the villa, and you got him into the room by telling him to come and talk to his mum? Yeah.... I think I'd be uncomfortable too in his position

Darling, your mummy is facetiming in our bedroom, oh by the way, fancy your hole 👉 🕳

My DH would be in like a dirty shirt. A day with an unexpected quickie is a good day.

1. The ruse was very odd (the mum bit)
2. Contrary to popular belief, blokes aren't always 'up for it', so to speak. Probably just happened to pick the wrong moment. 👍
3. Ltb 😉 (joke)

so him being a good parent and being in full parent mode, made you want to have sex with him?
really bad timing not to mention the full villa.
i find it rather pathetic when partners feel rejected when the other person says not a good time/not in the mood/ want to get ready for the outing/want to spend time with my family etc.

I hope ye got the ride in the end OP!

My dh would have been delighted yes but quite rightly he would also have advised that we wait until the entire villa aren’t awake and that we pick a more private opportunity

My husband would have worried something was seriously wrong with his parents for them to be facetiming without arranging a time first. It definitely wouldn't leave him feeling sexy.

Had an ex who use to reject me it made me hate him. I understand your feelings but know this is nothing to do with you it’s his issue

He might've thought she’d be watching!

Well it was a rather odd ruse for a start for getting in the mood but milling around to go somewhere big comes with high risk of interruption by impatient dc. or they might get wind and come speak to granny themselves 😬

Don't bring mums into sexy time. Just walking over and saying come with me might have been more direct and clear.

His mum and a chore! 🤦🏻‍♀️

He was a bit of a dick to get cross about it, but such a crunching mental gear change in a busy houseful of people getting ready for a day out is hardly conducive.

It’s not great to assume that all men are so thirsty all of the time that they can just switch into fuck mode like grateful dogs, no matter what else is going on around them (or even if you throw their mum into the mix 😂), and then feel needlessly rejected when that’s not the case. If the sexes were reversed in this situation there’d be outrage on your behalf.

It sounds like you have a great relationship in general, so don’t hang onto this and let it fester, OP. Your ego’s a bit bruised but it’s really nothing.

But DH’s mum is always FaceTiming us. Wouldn’t have caused concern

Bedroom door has a lock

I'm sorry you didn't pull it off, OP . The thread has given me a morning chuckle though.

I've never seen 'fancy a quickie' fail, so maybe just get straight to it next time 🤞🏾