To want to launch the kid who called DD(5) fat into space?

[ThomasinaHoskins]

She’s five! Just finished Reception, and some dick of a kid (I’m not sorry about referring to him as such) has told her that she’s “not beautiful as she has fat cheeks and a fat arm”. Just the one eh pal? Twit.

I don’t know whether I dislike him more for thinking it’s acceptable to say this kind of thing to small girls, or for giving me the headache of trying to address body image earlier than I was hoping to have to do so, and in the middle of the summer hols to boot. Any advice from those who have been through this will other small girls gratefully received.

I agree with this. Your behaviour is far worse OP.

And if you are like this over a 6 year old just wait until the government contact you with the The National Child Measurement Programme (NCMP). They call nearly every child overweight 😬

He sounds like a dick, but fat doesn't carry the same weight at 5 as it does for us. Did he just come out with it out of nowhere?

The one a sounds more like talking about a drawing or something.

There was a huge hoo hah in my DSs class, with a girl going home upset that a boy had said X was prettier than her. Mum was furious. However, this girl had been going around asking who was prettier, her or X, her or Y etc. so wasn't exactly blameless for the situation. It's v different if he just said it out the blue than if someone else was pushing the conversation.

How on earth can a 6 year old child sound like "a dick"

Behave.....

No you are not unreasonable. My DD is 12 and one girl has decided to be horrible to her (they were friends previously and my DD went out of her way to be nice) and she said to the class behind DD’s back that she has a big nose when it’s anything but. It’s a little button nose. These kids fuck me right off.

I have a child this age and couldn't get upset about this. Kids say all kinds of crap and at this age, like another poster has said, "fat" doesn't hold the same weight (no pun intended) as it does for us as adults.

It's a descriptive term in most cases, they say what they see. It seems it has touched a nerve with you?

@LittleGreenDragons YES! My 5 year old is on 90th centile, one mark off being overweight and requiring 'advice'. What they fail to miss is that my child was born on 99.6th centile so has actually dropped...

The issue isn’t that he said it, children say horrible things regularly.

The issue is that your DD was distressed about it.

She should at 5 yo know that:

a) she is normal size
b) even if she wasn’t she could also be beautiful
c) we don’t care what unpleasant people think about us
d) she’s fabulous in every way.

Spend the summer working on her resilience and her sarcastic come backs.

That's 12 year olds. These are 5 and 6 years? You can't reasonably call a 6 year old child, a dick!

As for your DD, I'm sorry to say, but it sounds like you're not bringing her up to be strong within herself.
A comment about her nose should be easily laughed off.
For 12, she sounds extra sensitive and quite vulnerable.

Regardless of what size your daughter is, it's depressing that children as young as six are being taught to use "fat" as in insult rather than a descriptive word. But you only need look at posts on this thread and on Mumsnet in general to see that this attitude is sadly persistent.

I always told my children that being mean and a bully is a clear sign that those children typically aren’t loved enough at home or sporting bad had happened to them. This means they have a hole inside them and they try to make themselves feel better by being horrible to others. It’s not about the child they are trying to bully, it’s about their being miserable inside. Oddly this really worked for all 4 of my kids as they just felt pity for the bully and saw over time that they didn’t act like typical kids, were often scruffy and didn’t have decent life experiences to share on the carpet. My kids made the observation on their own time that bullies start to tell bigger and bigger lies as they went through school. They knew by year 5-6 that bullies are inherently insecure ( not in those words obviously).

Why is this little boy being called names?
Isn't this worse, because you're an adult and should know better?

The boy did nothing wrong except state facts. The way he states facts needs to be worked on, as he grows.

HE thinks your DD isn't beautiful and he said so.
You say your DD does have chubby cheeks and he said so.
Her arms maybe are a bit plump, he saw one of them (maybe she was putting jumper on at the time) and he said so.

Your response is way over the top and makes things worse for your DD, instead of better.

In your DD’s case, it must be jealousy. As girls approach teenage years, they become looks conscious. Your dd must be considered pretty, and the ‘friend’ started to put her down due to her own insecurity.
Speaking from my own experience, the friend was overweight and started putting me down for physical aspects I never had any issues with.

Little boy should not be called names. But I think op is hurt for her daughter who at the age of 5 felt conscious about how she looks due to his comments.

And saying he thinks dd is not beautiful and said the truth is not nice. Beauty is subjective, so what kind of truth or fact is it?

Mean girl.

What does a 6 year old boy know about beauty anyway. Really? At 6 ?

And saying he thinks dd is not beautiful and said the truth is not nice. Beauty is subjective, so what kind of truth or fact is it?

Not truth or fact but it's opinion, and last time I checked we were still allowed to have that!