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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I too posh for Cambridge?

114 replies

BeAmberWasp · 09/08/2025 13:17

Leave my house and my odds of being harassed by a male seem to be almost 100%. Chances of passing someone stinking of weed/human shit/body odor are also 100%. Chances of being sworn at by a vagrant: 100%. Chances of having my bike stolen 0% because it's worthless and has 5 locks on it but if there was one less lock it would be 100%. There is no sense of community here. Everyone seem to be extremely rude to each other and there's a stabbing every week.

I am trying so hard to be less judgemental and stuck up but I don't have the fight in me anymore.

What the hell am I paying SO much MONEY for?

Can someone recommend somewhere better that isn't too far. What is Norwich like? Ely? Seems to have lower crime. Is moving to Southwold my only hope? I can't do this anymore. Cambridge is sold as a salubrious area but is extremely uncivilised.

OP posts:
Locutus2000 · 09/08/2025 16:25

BeAmberWasp · 09/08/2025 13:17

Leave my house and my odds of being harassed by a male seem to be almost 100%. Chances of passing someone stinking of weed/human shit/body odor are also 100%. Chances of being sworn at by a vagrant: 100%. Chances of having my bike stolen 0% because it's worthless and has 5 locks on it but if there was one less lock it would be 100%. There is no sense of community here. Everyone seem to be extremely rude to each other and there's a stabbing every week.

I am trying so hard to be less judgemental and stuck up but I don't have the fight in me anymore.

What the hell am I paying SO much MONEY for?

Can someone recommend somewhere better that isn't too far. What is Norwich like? Ely? Seems to have lower crime. Is moving to Southwold my only hope? I can't do this anymore. Cambridge is sold as a salubrious area but is extremely uncivilised.

I've lived in and around Cambridge for nearly fifty years, I don't recognise any of this. Where are you hanging out?

It's a fucking city, of course it has some issues. Maybe Bath would be more to your tastes.

The further you go towards the fens the worse it gets.

Swirlythingy2025 · 09/08/2025 16:36

Dappy777 · 09/08/2025 14:02

God that’s so depressing to read. I’ve always thought of Cambridge as one of the few really nice, civilised towns in the U.K. Christ, is there ANYWHERE you can live in peace? Is there ANYWHERE on this planet you can escape vicious, foul-mannered, anti-social little scumbags? I’ve spent my whole life in fear of people like that. I was scared of them at school, saw a male friend beaten up by them when I was teenager, lived in fear of them in digs at university, and now have to avoid them when I walk my dogs. It all goes wrong at the start. Vicious, ignorant, abusive people with a history of neglect should be stopped from having children. But we just allow these cycles of violence and anti-social behaviour to continue generation after generation.

because then we get told its eugenics', so instead society has to put up with a percentage of society that basically are not suited to be apart of that society
maybe during the cold war the soviets had the good answer when they made the closed cities where you had to apply to be apart of the cities etc

AnnaQuayInTheUk · 09/08/2025 16:43

Until 2 years ago I lived in/around Cambridge all my adult life bar 3 years in London pre DC.

I don't recognise this picture of Cambridge at all. Yes there are a few beggars and a few street homeless, as there are in any town/city.

My DC went to local schools. Their friends are lovely young people who, by and large, went to university or into apprenticeships/trades. Very little bullying or anti social behaviour that I was aware of.

Whereabouts in Cambridge do you live OP?

Zov · 09/08/2025 16:48

No.

the5thgoldengirl · 09/08/2025 16:49

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This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

AxMxPfan · 09/08/2025 16:54

Whatafustercluck · 09/08/2025 14:38

It's an unfair reputation. We stayed in Luton overnight recently before a flight and I felt positively privileged to come from Peterborough. Both have been voted the UK's worst places to live. No comparison as far as I'm concerned! There are nice parts of Peterborough, just as anywhere. And yes, much cheaper!

Ooh can you give examples of nice areas please? I’m considering Peterborough as an option 😊

WalkDontWalk · 09/08/2025 16:54

CurlewKate · 09/08/2025 14:39

What’s being posh got to do with it?

Quite.

The implication is that we peasants don't mind theft, assault, bad hygiene and general squalor. It's just our natural habitat, bless our grubby little hearts.

Zov · 09/08/2025 16:55

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This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

That was a complete sentence! 😆

the5thgoldengirl · 09/08/2025 16:56

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usersame · 09/08/2025 17:02

DS has just finished uni there and I always thought it was beautiful. Maybe just move house / street OP, not city. You must be aware that 99% of places in the UK are going to be a lot more problematic than Cambridge (for all the reasons you mention).

Thingyfanding · 09/08/2025 17:02

Brianthedog · 09/08/2025 14:53

Bollocks is it. As someone with a police officer for a child, I can tell you that people just don’t bother reporting a lot of crime as the police don’t do anything. Even he didn’t bother reporting it when his motorbike got nicked, it wasn’t worth it for an old runaround and they wouldn’t have done anything anyway.

There is something every week now where I live. We’ve have 3 shootings this year, there are regular stabbings, arson, you can’t walk through the park now as there are so many muggings.

Edited

That’s terrible. Where do you live? I used to live in Stockwell, that wasn’t great.

Overandone · 09/08/2025 17:03

I don’t think it’s about being posh so much as feeling safe. Cambridge is a city though. I wasn’t aware just how much poverty there was in Cambridge. I used to live in Arbury in North Cambs and we didn’t encounter any issues. I had small kids there but didn’t find Cambridge particularly friendly in comparison to a lot of other places. Unfortunately I think most places have a level of crime, even places like Saffron Walden have had issues at their skate park. I think it’s more an indicator of what is happening to society.

Whatafustercluck · 09/08/2025 17:10

AxMxPfan · 09/08/2025 16:54

Ooh can you give examples of nice areas please? I’m considering Peterborough as an option 😊

Hampton (Hargate, Waters, Gardens), parts of Werrington, Netherton, Park Road. Orton Wistow, Orton Longueville. A little further out you've got Yaxley, Barnack (villages just outside Peterborough but with bus links).

Brianthedog · 09/08/2025 17:35

Thingyfanding · 09/08/2025 17:02

That’s terrible. Where do you live? I used to live in Stockwell, that wasn’t great.

Dudley.

MinnieMountain · 09/08/2025 17:56

I was joking about Peterborough. It’s popular to rubbish it but I’ve lived there happily for 20 years.

Feel free to PM me @AxMxPfan . It depends on how close to the train station you want to be and whether or not schools are a factor.

waitingforthehallmarkedman · 09/08/2025 18:04

Goady nonsense and I'm from the Arbury 🤣

Whatareyoutalkingaboutnow · 09/08/2025 18:05

Posh people don't live in Southwold, they have their holiday homes there. See also, Aldeburgh and Walberswick.

Potterwatch89 · 09/08/2025 18:21

Not the Cambridge I know and love. I echo PP, look at any of the villages surrounding the city, beautiful and a great sense of community!

HeddaGarbled · 09/08/2025 19:37

A couple of passages from the Times article today:

Am I too posh for Cambridge?
Am I too posh for Cambridge?
Octavia64 · 09/08/2025 19:47

Bike theft is common anywhere in Cambridge. Always has been. I’ve moved north and it’s a lot less posh but feels less feral in parts.

I used to teach teens who lived on the Arbury and I remember a few stabbings. One kid I taught was stabbed a few years after leaving school (to be fair he was one of the most unpleasant teens I ever had the misfortune of knowing and frankly I’m n surprised it took that long).

Borborygmus · 09/08/2025 19:48

Having lived in Cambridge for getting on for 70 years, I don't recognise that description at all. The Mill Road area is somewhat dodgier than the rest, but in general Cambridge feels very safe to me.

chiffontalks · 09/08/2025 20:04

I've lived in Cambridge and raised my children there. Never experienced anything like it.
Cambridge is a city but does not feel like a big city. It's more like a big town. I lived near the city centre, walked alone, daily, and never experienced any harassment. You do get some colourful characters, there aren't many. Once you live here, you sort of recognise them. Most are harmless. We lived near a homeless shelter. There were some shady characters. But have never felt unsafe as I do in other major cities.

Marylou2 · 09/08/2025 21:43

Did the OP not come back? Obviously too Posh for this thread as well as for Cambridge Grin

Scarylett · 09/08/2025 21:45

I live in Cambridge. I don’t recognise your descriptions of the town.

OneNeatBlueOrca · 09/08/2025 21:46

MrsArcher23 · 09/08/2025 14:23

Wondering if one is ‘too posh’ for anywhere or anything is usually a sign that one definitely isn’t!

People who really are posh would never describe themselves as posh.