Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

To not want to buy designer clothes for a 5 year old?

73 replies

onefunkymama · 28/05/2008 20:32

My dd has just started at school and her new friends keep coming round to play with designer clothes as their clothes to change out of school uniform into. I'm embarressed because my dd is wearing the normal highstreet brands. I don't want to have to spend loads of money on expensive clothes but I am so embarressed. Should I buy them second hand (Ebay etc) or not, I don't really want to and I definately don't want to make a rod for my own back in the furture. What shall I do?

OP posts:

beaniesteve · 28/05/2008 20:48

Teach your child that being looked down upon is not attractive nor kind. She'll be ok.

hana · 28/05/2008 20:48

scottishmummy · 28/05/2008 20:49

i did hear a mum squawking at her child "get off the swings...don't sit down that's Dior you have got on"

my LO is a muck monster, and i wont inhabit that by getting in a fankle about a pair o pricey breeks

onefunkymama - just use your usual judgment and style. don't be too swayed. problem with keeping up with folk is it is an expensive frustrating task

FAQ · 28/05/2008 20:49

sorry but I'm not washing school uniform everyday - I go through enough school trousers for DS1 as it is, without him spending an extra 4-5hrs in them each day!!

DS1 also feels more comfortable changing into his "home" clothes when he gets in (I used to feel the same when I was his age)

Hulababy · 28/05/2008 20:49

hana - all the girls, inc DD, change out of uniform after school. DD has an expensive school uniform - summer dress is in excess of 25-30 for example. So she only has a couple of eac - so I need them to last the week, which they won;t if she is outside playing after school.

Surfermum · 28/05/2008 20:51

My two closest friends that I've made via dd live in HUGE houses, and I mean HUGE - 6 bedrooms and swimming pools etc. I'm in a little 2 bed cottage. They have a lot more money than we do.

Both of them were here last Saturday for a barbie and both said how much they enjoyed it and how much their children enjoyed being here. And I know that neither of them care less that dd is dressed mainly in charity shop and Asda/Tesco clothes, and they'd be horrified if I started buying clothes that I couldn't afford just so dd was wearing what theirs wore.

What's important is the sort of person you are, not what labels you wear.

FAQ · 28/05/2008 20:51

oh - sorry hadn't seen that they take their clothes with them to change into - that IS odd.

If DS1 goes to a friends house after school then yes he stays in his school uniform.

posieparker · 28/05/2008 20:51

Take her out of the school if you really think it's that much of an issue. I love the 'designer' (never called them designer just nice) clothes for my children and buy lovely PJs for the boys and then they get Simpsons and Spiderman crappy things and that's all they want to wear to bed. I'm sure if your dc had pink, barbie tops they would win for 'lovability' with all the little girls and so forget that £80 dress from Oilily!!
You can get stuff online I'm sure for special occasions and Monsoon have fab sales.

Piffle · 28/05/2008 20:52

I'd be tempted to engage them in mud pie making to test the kudos commitment to nice gear

Original poster

onefunkymama · 28/05/2008 20:52

Hulababy, thanks, dd is far more interested in the skirt issue than the label (or indeed even if the clothes go together and will happily wear turquise and bright pink, with orange socks given half a chance.) I know its me not dd who's bothered. Honestly, I had one Mum (a total cow BTW) who walked up to me in the school playground and told me that she thought my son's granny knitted sweater, that I adore and really suits him, was vile and that she's never lower her children to wearing home knitted stuff.

OP posts:

Thomcat · 28/05/2008 20:53

The children you are talking about are 5, they don't know what a designer l;abel is so why would they look down on your DD??????

And you say these kids are coming round to play so it's not like anyone else has a problem with who is wearing what.

If it bothers you that much mix what you have with some charity shop/ebay bargins, that's absoluitley fine and why not, you can pick up great Boden bits for less than a Next full privce top anyway, but you're the only one who cares by the sounds of it.

As long as your children are nice to other kids, are clean and friendly that's what matters. Not whether they are wearing Boden over Mothercare.

Nbg · 28/05/2008 20:53

Christ, where do you live?!!!

Does this kind of thing happen?

IMVHO, if those parents and children look down on you and your child because of what she is wearing then you really don't need people like that in your life.

Bizarre.

Original poster

onefunkymama · 28/05/2008 20:54

Piffle lol, good idea

OP posts:

posieparker · 28/05/2008 20:55

onefunkymama, I hope you whispered 'Why don't you fuck off?' and smiled. Or asked her if she was a rep in her BMW?

Hulababy · 28/05/2008 20:55

How rude of that woman!!! Some people just don't have basic manners do they?! Horrid person no doubt.

Honestly, don't worry about it. The children certainly won't care, esp at this age. And I very much doubt the parents will either - certainly they don;t appear to here.

paperchain · 28/05/2008 20:55

fatal attraction still haunts me , God knows how many years later lol

georgiemama · 28/05/2008 20:55

well she can't be posh, or upper class, because she is totally lacking in manners and needs a kick up the arse. Unsolicited, she told someone their child's jumper was vile? Did you tell her that she is obviously a total bitch, and if not why not?

I'd seriously reconsider whether you want your child mixing with people like this if I were you - they sound ghastly, pretentious and mean.

jellycat · 28/05/2008 20:56

I'm with hana, but we have cheap school uniform. If ds1 changes when he gets in, chances are I'll have 2 sets of dirty clothes by the end of the day instead of 1. None of the boys we've ever had home for a playdate after school have changed and I never send ds1 with a change of clothes when he is invited back somewhere either.

rosealbie · 28/05/2008 20:56

I couldn't stand to be around the kind of parents you are describing!

Thomcat · 28/05/2008 20:58

OFM - just read your last post about a school mum saying your DS jumper was vile!
Can't quite believe what I'm reading.
Stunned. Didn't realise people like her existed.

paperchain · 28/05/2008 20:59

oops wrong thread

bluenosesaint · 28/05/2008 21:00

I find it utterly bizarre that you are worried about this for a 5 year old!

Why on earth does it matter?

Actually, if i'm going to be completely honest, i hate designer clothes on children. Really hate it. I think it looks awful. And particularly with my 5 year old, Good Lord, she would put holes in them within seconds!

Really dont understand why you are worried about this. Surely the 'whole' package (being kind, tolerant, friendly etc) is more important than what your child is wearing??

And back to your original q - of course you are not being unreasonable to not want to buy designer clothes, although you actually sound to me as though you want to ...

misdee · 28/05/2008 21:00

we mix boden with geoge@asda lol.

there was a lady at a local car boot sale selling some gorgeous Oilily stuff for dd3 age group the other week, all under £10 a piece and a lot brand new, some worn etc, and i was so tempted by a skirt, but then thought dd3 is a grubmonster and it wouldnt stay nice.

i will hunt her out though if the baby is a girl as the stuff was 'proper' girl clothes and not mini-bratz.

misdee · 28/05/2008 21:01

if a jumper was handknitted then it was designer one of a kind

Original poster

onefunkymama · 28/05/2008 21:01

Thomcat, I know you're right.

I'm sure I'm being over sensitive and I'm just trying to be accepted by the other Mums. in fairness some of the Mums are quite nice, but some are not- I can't drive for medical reasons and many of the will drive past me, and ds in the buggy, in the peeing rain and not offer a lift when they all know I have to walk 1.5 miles to get dd into school. They won't even look at me. I have to say I have a few regrets about the school but dd is happy, doing well and I worked ever so hard to get her in.

OP posts:

Flip

1 2 3