To think this mum could have done something a bit more effective?

[Canonlythinkofthisone]

It's not very exciting but I'm just a bit perplexed by events of today.

Took DD to an adventure type playground thing. There was a slide. Long story short at one point, a child held the slide hostage by sticking himself half up and half down, refusing to move, meaning no other children could use the slide.

No big deal right, loads of other stuff to play on. However, I'm a people watcher and so I watched this unfold.

Mum, looking a bit harassed, repeated approx 30 times, come on joey. Off you get. That's it. For 15 solid mins she stood at the bottom of the slide repeating that, quietly.

Kids were queuing up to use the slide. If it had been mine DD. A couple of nice asks, a stern get down, and if still no budging. I'd have just gone to remove her.

Eventually a bigger child approx 8yo (the one in question was about 3/4) took matters into his own hands and barreled down the slide taking out the 4 year old.

There were then loads of tears and tantrums and the mum of the 4yo was having a right go at the dad of the 8yo.

But AIBU to think the mum should have/could have just removed the problem from the slide? 15 minutes when toddlers/young children are involved is a long time, and I was just a bit baffled by her complete ineffectiveness. Or AIBU?

My kids are 6 and 7, when we go anywhere if there's a toddler I'll say ' remember to be careful around the baby, if you need me come and get me'. If this happened I'd tell them to give it back now or we are leaving. Not acceptable parenting at all.

Gentle Parenting - “I don’t want to use the word No to little Bobby (because I’ve been reading a load of shight saying the word no damages kids MH) Little Bobby has feelings and he’s just trying to navigate the world and it’s my job to create a safe environment in which little Bobby can explore his surroundings”

God help us all when these kids grow up. Much like the 20 somethings now that can’t hold down a job because it’s ’too stressful’!

I don’t know how people have energy for it. I wouldn’t have had the time or inclination to faff for 15 mins. Surely most parents have ‘the look’ and no nonsense tone.

Assuming she could realistically get to the child yanbu. I'd have asked mine once, then got her down.

My child also would have been the one barrelling down the slide to remove them herself.

My children would only have been asked once ! If no response I would have removed them very firmly and they would have been told in no uncertain terms that any more bad behaviour , home we go .

Its not a new thing. My kids are adults now but I remember sitting watching parents faff around and thinking ffs grab the tiny critter and chuck 'em over your shoulder 🤣

One that does genuinely irritate me though is empty threats.

Do that again and we're going home
Kid does it again
Do that again and we're going home
Kid does it again
Do that again and we're go..
Oh ffs just shut up if youre going to do fuck all. Just let the kid carry on trying to ram lego up his arse and stop pretending there's consequences.

Back in the bad old Lord of the Flies 70s this you moved because a big kid would slide into your back and no parents cajoled or supervised. The kid won’t sit in the middle of the slide again and the mum won’t stand around waiting for him to be clobbered. What an excellent 8 year old. Everyone else needs to just get on with it.

If he were mine, I’d have dragged him off.
Kid fully deserved what he had coming to him.

@Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast was just typing same!
If you do say if you don’t stop x we’ll leave then follow through. I hate overhearing parents say if you don’t stop x we are going repeated about 10 times. While the rest of us are thinking why are you still here just do it.

My baby accidentally Lord of the Fliesed an older child (maybe 4) who wasn’t listening to his parent and started climbing up the slide for the 56th time just as mine had started her descent. I was a bit worried about what the other parent would say as Little Bobby was bonked firmly off the slide by tiny hooves from above, but to her credit the mum just said “SEE Bobby I told you that’s what would happen” and gave me a grin.

I'd like a strange kid to try and take any of my chips! (or any belonging to my DGC)

They'd be back with their mother in a heartbeat!

I think we’re all on the 8 year old kids side here.

My autistic 6 year old at the time was being mean to some kids in this play area in a service station which we visited on the way home from Wales. After a few minutes of trying to sit and eat our meal I could see my son was hoing to be a dick to these other little boys do I took him to eat in the car. Its much better to remove young kids from these situations (despite my husband trying to insist I stay put, and continually bollock my son while he doesn't listen)

My niece was a regular slide blocker when she was little. I’d request she moved in a gentle/coaxing way 2-3 times, make one firm request and then tell her I was going to intervene and shift her off.

I have no idea how any parent could spend 15 minutes faffing about coaxing their child off. I wouldn’t have the patience for that, I didn’t even when it wasn’t my child!

This and several other examples on this thread are what give "gentle parenting" a bad name. It's not parenting, gently or otherwise.

Get that 8 year old a nice sugary donut 🤣

She should have taken him down. But was it REALLY 15 minutes? That seems like a long time. Most 3-4yos would get bored before then anyway.

I wouldn't have thought too much of her not doing more, she could have had a disability that would make it risky climbing the slide, she may have waited out too long thinking by the time I get there he will be down, could have been embarrassed. She was very wrong to have a go at the other child's dad though. I may sound a bit ruthless but I was the mother of the slide blocker I'd think he got a dose of natural consequences and hope it taught him a lesson.

The mother was selfish and allowed her son to be selfish. He was behaving unacceptably and was old enough to know about sharing. She should have removed him and taken him home.

😂

Really boils my blood this sort of thing. How hard is it to take the doll off her child?

Some truly useless parents who are clearly afraid of their own kids.

I think I need to watch lord of the flies, though I think it may trigger horrible school camp memories 🫣

My kids get a warning and then a count to 3. If theyre still doing the annoying thing by the time I get to 3, then they get the consequence I've threatened. They're 5 and 7 years old now and I very rarely get to two, let alone 3 these days, because they know I will follow through on the warning. I can't imagine spending 15 minutes pleading with a 4yo to move. I'm team 8yo all the way here.

I probably was Junior Slideblocker at one stage, albeit for a different reason - having got up there I froze in abject terror. More often than not, I didn't want to be there at all, but when you're four (or eight for that matter) the world is full of people who think they know better than you what's scary and what's not. So up the ladder you go...

Unfortunately, once you're stuck at the top of the slide with a queue building up behind you, there's only one way out and that's down the slide. And if it takes a gallumphing great eight year old to get you moving, then that's what it takes. People around me learned to be careful what they pushed me into; hopefully the little boy in the OP's story now knows about FAFO.

Team 8yr old!