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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Strange comments about the U.K.

321 replies

Lessando · 02/08/2025 14:21

I often just read threads without posting. But I read one thread on here recently that made me think, and I wanted to start a new thread about it.

There was a thread on here a while ago, it was titled "Do you feel lucky in life".

About one hundred posters came on and wrote a similiar thing, they all wrote

"Oh yes I am so lucky to have been born in the U.K." and they wrote things like

"I won the lottery of life by being born in the UK"

I was surprised at the fawning over the top comments, because they are in stark contrast to how I have experienced living in other countries. Living conditions in many other countries seem to me to be a lot better than living conditions in the UK.

I have lived in other countries and right now I am living in the UK for a year . Don't get me wrong , there are things that are nice about the UK.

What I really wanted to discuss is why do some people in the UK seem to think it is the best country in the world.
But, if you go outside of the UK, a lot of media outlets talk about the UK in a very negative way. Do people know this happesn?

So many other countries are doing better economically than the UK is. Living conditions are better. The last EU country that i lived in, i barely saw a homeless person.

In my current city in the UK, homeless people come up to me and ask me for money all the time. Every single day.

I lived in an EU country last year. The media outside of the UK always reports negatively about the UK. They usually say that the UK is a very bad place to live, especially after Brexit.

Im not really saying if I personally think the UK is good or bad, obviously I am just one person.

I more wanted to discuss the discrepancy between many people in the UK thinking it is the best country in the world and they are lucky to live there, and the media outside the UK who report that the UK is a terrible place to live in.
Any thoughts on it?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
ShanghaiDiva · 02/08/2025 15:28

I don’t think people on that thread meant that the uk is the best place to live, but rather they were lucky to be born in a country where, on a world scale, we are rich, have free healthcare at the point of delivery, free education to 18, not experienced war or famine, the right to ptotest, the right to vote…etc
i have lived in five countries and would happily remain in four of the five.

shuggles · 02/08/2025 15:28

@Lessando If the UK is so bad, why do tens of thousand of young men, every year, pay huge sums of money to bypass immigration controls and get smuggled in?

EasternStandard · 02/08/2025 15:31

I do feel lucky that’s not to say there aren’t some problems rn

Slightyamusedandsilly · 02/08/2025 15:31

I think I'm lucky to have been born in the 20th century. And to a reasonable extent, to be in the UK.

However, having lived in several different countries, I definitely think we have a harder life than anywhere else I've ever lived OTHER than the USA. I would live in another of the other countries again (European and Asian) but I will never go back to the US.

We work longer hours here. Accept a lower standard of living. Utilities are hugely higher. Our organisations on the whole are well organised (local government) with less red tape than some countries (Spain, I'm looking at you!). Pollution here is middling, falling somewhere between Europe and Asia.

We certainly don't live in utopia. But it isn't dystopia either, apart from healthcare, the current quality / accessibility of which I find terrifying in the UK compared to Europe and Asia. Of course, the US is far worse for healthcare due to the lack of universal provision. .

usedtobeaylis · 02/08/2025 15:32

There's a lot I don't like the about the UK and that kind of exceptionalism and belief that people from here have some amazing intrinsic values unique to the UK does my head in, it's one of the things I don't like because we have a lot of shit here as well, a lot of very awful people. However, I do also feel fortunate to have been born here, out of pure luck - I've lived in various places around the UK and Scotland is my home. It's a bit like the line from the Band Aid song - 'thank God it's them instead of you' - though I'm aware that many of the issues in other countries are a direct consequence of UK intervention and even people from and in the UK have been on the receiving end of that with partition etc.

Lemniscate8 · 02/08/2025 15:33

Lessando · 02/08/2025 14:40

I did think the comments of

"I won the lottery in the womb, by being born in the UK"

Were over the top, yes.

That is my opinion.

Edited

are you in the UK? Do you appreciate what we've got? Why wouldn't it feel like a lottery win?

RosesAndHellebores · 02/08/2025 15:33

@Lessando so that we can all see the evidence, would you please link to the negative international news items you are referring to?

We have a home in France and in England. They have their upsides and downsides but to me the UK is home. It is where our professional careers are based, our wider family and support networks and where our principle assets are. Compared to France, the UK is far more tolerant of diversity; compared to the UK, France in many ways is more efficiently run, despite the excruciating bureaucracy.

Outside9 · 02/08/2025 15:33

Propaganda and nationalism in short.

Helps keep citizens submissive to the will of the state.

Etincelle · 02/08/2025 15:34

Most people haven't lived in a variety of countries like you OP. It's OK for people to be happy with where they live. Maybe they enjoy nature where they live. I do. If I visited another country and someone said they liked living there I wouldn't start on "Are you mad? Everyone else slags off your country!!" Why? Because I'm not a rude twat.
It's not actually a positive thing for a country to slag off another country a lot by the way. Like you seem to think it is. It doesn't reflect well on them. Just makes them xenophobic. Not a good thing.

IAmQuiteNiceActually · 02/08/2025 15:34

I think that in general, people are being brainwashed into being grateful for everything. Like if you complain, people will say that you have no right to because you have a roof over your head and running water etc. I feel that this is very convenient for those at the top because it stops people protesting.

People in this country don't tend to protest though (me included) which is why we don't have a functioning ambulance service anymore and God knows how many people are living in mouldy temporary accommodation because they can't find a rental property.

The cost of living crisis is mostly caused by the transfer of wealth from the middle classes (including those on here earning over 100k) to the super rich (billionaires). But no-one seems to know this and everyone is so bogged down in their own social media drama that they don't take much notice. They wouldn't be able to protest because there is so much misinformation and in-fighting that they are missing the true cause of the problem.

blackbird77 · 02/08/2025 15:34

Lessando · 02/08/2025 14:30

I just think its strange how if you go outside of the UK , a lot of people say that the UK is an absolutely terrible place to live, and that they feel sorry for the people who live there.

But then you look at mumsnet, alot of people think that the UK is amazing.

It made me think, who is right.

Are UK people being brainwashed by UK media into thinking the UK is a better place to live in, than it is.

Or are other countries overly negative about the UK?

It’s not brainwashing. It’s being able to comparatively understand that the UK is “one of the best” countries to live in in the world. Its personal preference which one of about 10-15 or so is the “absolute best”. It’s one of the richest, developed countries in the western world. People do not realise how good they have it here compared to a large majority of countries for lots of reasons (apologies for any typos! I’m on the bus):

1, Access to clean running water, heat, electricity etc. Do you know what % of the world cant turn on a tap and have clean water?

2, Temperate climate. Not too hot or cold. We aren’t on a fault line or an extreme weather so experience virtually no natural disasters like tsunamis, flooding, volcanic eruptions, earthquakes, droughts, monsoons, tornadoes etc. It also means large parts of our country don't starve as crops don’t fail.

3, Decent infrastructure comparatively. We have good working roads, bridges, buildings, public transport etc. Are there problems? Yes but it’s infinitely better than the majority of countries. Even developed countries like Italy have worse roads and bridges than us.

4, Low levels of crime comparatively. Homicide, rape, gang violence, gun crime, robbery, home invasion are almost non-existent here. People will (rightly) complain about things like uptick in shoplifting and knife crime here but compatibly this crimes pale in insignificance to the violent crimes faced by citizens in other countries. Look at the violent rape statistics in Papa New Guinea or the Home Invasion statistics for South Africa. Most of us don’t go to bed each night thinking we may be assaulted or robbed whereas this is a realistic threat for a lot of the developed world.

5, Low levels of corruption, malpractice, negligence. Yes there is a problem with corruption in all governments and politicians but this is nothing compared to the corruption, blackmail, bribery of governments in other countries, especially poorer countries where virtually no money goes to the people who need it. We have laws in place to protect citizens again everything from making sure food is safe and non-contaminated to background checks on people before employment. This doesn’t happen in all countries. Their governments just don’t care. So many police forces are corrupt. Reporting a rape will often destroy your life further. The average citizen in a very underdeveloped country will have little legal resource to any injustice they have faced.

6, Rights for women, children and animals. These are almost non-existent in some countries. Men’s rights aren’t necessarily much better either. So many women in the world face rape, child/forced marriages, battery, mistreatment, abuse, barbaric religious practices, restriction to medical care and education etc. Boys are forced into becoming child soldiers at young ages and animal welfare is nonexistent.

7, Higher societal levels of trust and civic duty than in other countries (though not as much as in other Western regions like Scandinavia). Cleaner environments. Better sanitation. Actual working sewage systems for example. Few blackouts.

8, Very little threat of war, conflict, displacement or genocide. Not an option for many countries out there. So many children in other countries have experienced things by the age of 5 we would only consider in our worst nightmares.

9, Amazing history and culture. British achievements are influential in all countries. I’m so proud to live in a country that has achieved so much! The UK has produced everything from the likes of Shakespeare to Led Zeppelin, from Isaac Newton to The Beatles. We’ve invented Penicillin, The Steam Engine, The Telephone. We have a rich royal history, great folklore, comedy, interesting characters etc.

10, Beautiful unspoiled countryside and woodlands, castles, cathedrals, churches, statues and so much more!

Sorry that was long! I consider myself lucky to be born here everyday. Whether it’s the “absolute best” country to live in when comparing all metrics forensically, I’m not sure but it’s up there for one of the best countries you could be lucky enough to have been born in!

Glitchymn1 · 02/08/2025 15:38

Well I certainly don’t and wish I could get out.

ShanghaiDiva · 02/08/2025 15:38

@Lessando i was one one of the posters who said being born on the uk is a winning ticket in the uterus lottery. There are many other countries that would aloe be a winning ticket. I have lived in five countries and travelled to over 60 and there are many places which are much more challenging - no free healthcare, no free education, no right to protest, civil war..etc
I recognise that the uk is not perfect, but it’s not bad and in all my time overseas (25 years) nobody commented that they felt sorry for me as a uk citizen.

Agapornis · 02/08/2025 15:38

Every country thinks it's amazing. I've lived in a few. They hate it when you, as an outsider, think it's amazing. Countries which I've lived in:
The Netherlands thinks it's amazing (don't talk about the drug problems)
Belgium thinks it's amazing (don't talk about the alcoholism)
New Zealand thinks it's amazing (don't talk about the domestic violence)
The UK thinks it's amazing (don't talk about the lack of investment in the health & wellbeing of its population)

In my experience the UK is the least bad for this, at least there is some debate and critical thinking.

OP, what I like about the UK is the lack of homogenous thinking and being. There is no tall poppy syndrome, no lowest common denominator to adhere to. Standing out for whatever reason (having niche interests, or big achievements) is generally fine (providing it's not morally bad). Also, it's fairly easy to change career here. In much of Europe, once you have a degree in anything you're expected to stick to that for life, or get another degree. Transferable skills do in fact transfer.

coxesorangepippin · 02/08/2025 15:39

Totally agree with the op

The UK is ok, but not the best

And don't get me started on people protecting the NHS

Mapletreelane · 02/08/2025 15:40

In response to people mentioning Canada, it is a beautiful beautiful country but has terrible problems with drug addiction, especially in cities, much more than the UK.

Ontheedgeofit · 02/08/2025 15:40

So it’s all rather subjective depending on who you talk to:

  • someone who has never left the UK would probably think it’s great because how would they know better
  • someone who lives in the UK and has come from a poorer country perhaps to seek a better life would also think it’s great
  • someone who has travelled and had a great experience abroad would think it isn’t great
  • someone who has travelled and hasn’t had a great experience would think it’s great
  • someone who has moved to the UK from a hotter climate would probably think it isn’t great because of the cold
  • someone who moved to a hotter climate from the UK would probably think it’s great because they don’t like the heat

You get my picture…

What the media portray is another thing although I’ve yet to see a news piece on any country based on how great it is. Most legacy and non traditional media sources are pretty miserable about whatever country they happen to be reporting on.

LBFseBrom · 02/08/2025 15:40

I am glad I live in the UK. I don't go on about it being the best place in the world, I'm sure there is no such thing but I like it, am comfortable.

There are grotty bits anywhere in the world including England, areas where I would not live but where I am is nice enough.

I wouldn't take much notice of what the foreign press say about us, frankly. They are bound to home in on difficult areas. The British tabloids also like to cause outrage and scaremonger, I see their headlines online and they are laughable. Even Trump has done that, made a big deal out of Jaywick-on-Sea, somewhere most of us had never heard of (unless we lived nearby), until a TV documentary series was made about it. He made it sound as though all of England was like that which is laughable. Move a little way up the coast from Jaywick and it's quite acceptable.

It's nice here. It's also nice in other countries as long as you steer clear of some pockets.

Terrribletwos · 02/08/2025 15:41

blackbird77 · 02/08/2025 15:34

It’s not brainwashing. It’s being able to comparatively understand that the UK is “one of the best” countries to live in in the world. Its personal preference which one of about 10-15 or so is the “absolute best”. It’s one of the richest, developed countries in the western world. People do not realise how good they have it here compared to a large majority of countries for lots of reasons (apologies for any typos! I’m on the bus):

1, Access to clean running water, heat, electricity etc. Do you know what % of the world cant turn on a tap and have clean water?

2, Temperate climate. Not too hot or cold. We aren’t on a fault line or an extreme weather so experience virtually no natural disasters like tsunamis, flooding, volcanic eruptions, earthquakes, droughts, monsoons, tornadoes etc. It also means large parts of our country don't starve as crops don’t fail.

3, Decent infrastructure comparatively. We have good working roads, bridges, buildings, public transport etc. Are there problems? Yes but it’s infinitely better than the majority of countries. Even developed countries like Italy have worse roads and bridges than us.

4, Low levels of crime comparatively. Homicide, rape, gang violence, gun crime, robbery, home invasion are almost non-existent here. People will (rightly) complain about things like uptick in shoplifting and knife crime here but compatibly this crimes pale in insignificance to the violent crimes faced by citizens in other countries. Look at the violent rape statistics in Papa New Guinea or the Home Invasion statistics for South Africa. Most of us don’t go to bed each night thinking we may be assaulted or robbed whereas this is a realistic threat for a lot of the developed world.

5, Low levels of corruption, malpractice, negligence. Yes there is a problem with corruption in all governments and politicians but this is nothing compared to the corruption, blackmail, bribery of governments in other countries, especially poorer countries where virtually no money goes to the people who need it. We have laws in place to protect citizens again everything from making sure food is safe and non-contaminated to background checks on people before employment. This doesn’t happen in all countries. Their governments just don’t care. So many police forces are corrupt. Reporting a rape will often destroy your life further. The average citizen in a very underdeveloped country will have little legal resource to any injustice they have faced.

6, Rights for women, children and animals. These are almost non-existent in some countries. Men’s rights aren’t necessarily much better either. So many women in the world face rape, child/forced marriages, battery, mistreatment, abuse, barbaric religious practices, restriction to medical care and education etc. Boys are forced into becoming child soldiers at young ages and animal welfare is nonexistent.

7, Higher societal levels of trust and civic duty than in other countries (though not as much as in other Western regions like Scandinavia). Cleaner environments. Better sanitation. Actual working sewage systems for example. Few blackouts.

8, Very little threat of war, conflict, displacement or genocide. Not an option for many countries out there. So many children in other countries have experienced things by the age of 5 we would only consider in our worst nightmares.

9, Amazing history and culture. British achievements are influential in all countries. I’m so proud to live in a country that has achieved so much! The UK has produced everything from the likes of Shakespeare to Led Zeppelin, from Isaac Newton to The Beatles. We’ve invented Penicillin, The Steam Engine, The Telephone. We have a rich royal history, great folklore, comedy, interesting characters etc.

10, Beautiful unspoiled countryside and woodlands, castles, cathedrals, churches, statues and so much more!

Sorry that was long! I consider myself lucky to be born here everyday. Whether it’s the “absolute best” country to live in when comparing all metrics forensically, I’m not sure but it’s up there for one of the best countries you could be lucky enough to have been born in!

Low levels of crime? Do you live where there are multiple Turkish barber shops$?
Decent infrastructure..the roads are full of potholes.

Higher societal values...the towns and villages have been completely controlled by drug gangs and county lines.

coxesorangepippin · 02/08/2025 15:41

Blackbirds top ten list would apply to pretty much any Western country, let's face it.

Access to running water???!

Come on

Lessando · 02/08/2025 15:41

Lemniscate8 · 02/08/2025 15:33

are you in the UK? Do you appreciate what we've got? Why wouldn't it feel like a lottery win?

Hi i am just back. Give me a moment to read back through the posts.

Yes i already said that I am living and working in the UK for a year

It doesn't feel like a lottery win living here, because I feel that i have lived in other countries - where living conditions were a lot better than they are in the UK.

That is not attempting to insult the UK, before anyone comes at me.

It is just stating an opinion about differing living conditions.

OP posts:
MrsSkylerWhite · 02/08/2025 15:41

I imagine most people responding with those kind of comments had the current wars in mind in the ME and Ukraine/Russia. Of course being born in the UK is far luckier than being born in Sudan, Eritrea, Somalia, Yemen, etc.

Busbygirl · 02/08/2025 15:42

Which media exactly say the UK is a terrible place to live?
Can you quote?
No thought not.
Just trying to stir things up aren’t you.
It’s a great place most of the time, nowhere is utopia.

coxesorangepippin · 02/08/2025 15:43

Papua new Guinea vs UK??

Yes, of course the UK is better!

Dummydimmer · 02/08/2025 15:43

The only person I can remember with this sort of comment was my Dad, a working class Tory.He hated the USA and most of Europe. Read the Daily Express. Was in a union, but a kind of elitist. We were Protestants in Belfast, which explains a lot. He was anti-Semitic but not racist ( I never understood it) A lot to do with the Empire, I think. He'd no time for the USA or Apartheid South Africa. I think the British often retain a kind of elitism and longing for the Empire. It doesn't make sense but maybe explains the whole Farage thing. Just need to say I am not of this mindset, but am aware of it.

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