When I was younger, I asked my mum if I could have a 1 WKD at parties. She always said no, so alcohol became this big, forbidden thing. Not long before I turned 15, I ended up in hospital after drinking a bottle of vodka in a field with friends. I had no clue about limits or how to be sensible because I’d never been given the chance to learn safely.
My younger siblings (my dad’s children) were brought up differently. They were allowed the odd drink at home, and now that they’re old enough to drink legally, they’re very sensible with it, they might have a couple, but they know when to stop. It was never something to rebel against for them.
With my own daughter (14), I’ve taken a more relaxed approach. She’s been allowed a drink now and then at home or if she’s asked before a party. The most she’s had is two WKDs, and to be honest, she’s shown very little real interest in drinking, I think because it’s not a “forbidden” thing.
If she was to go to a supervised party, I’d probably let her take up to four WKDs or one of the big bottles, nothing too strong. But I’d also have a very clear conversation beforehand: she’s only to drink what I’ve given her, and if she starts feeling off or unsafe, she must ring me straight away, and she knows she won’t be in trouble if she does.