To let my 8 year old daughter shave half her head

[Missymini]

My daughter currently has a bob and she has decided she wants her hair cut shorter. We have looked together at pictures online and she likes the type were half the head is shaved and the remaining hair has a undercut. It feels quite drastic but I am tempted to let her as it is her hair we have discussed once it is done if she doesn't like it she will have to wait for it to grow out and she is adamant that is fine.

I totally understand where you're coming from, but honestly you can't let disgusting bigotry from idiots prevent your daughter from having the haircut she wants.

I'd maybe raise with her gently before she gets it cut, point out that some people might mistake her for a boy and see how she feels about it.

Let her do it, she's old enough to have judgement, it's her hair and her body. I understand you have fears over what others will do (but she doesn't and that's impressive), let her be herself. She's proud of it and also let her know that conformity doesn't need to control her life, I think letting be confident in her own skin is such a good lesson. Honeslty if any adult goes out of their way to say something (they need to look at themesleves), we need to stop having such utterly stereotypical views of what's feminine or not. Also I think it's a good way to grow her confidence. Confidence isn't thinking your better than people, just doing you and also not taking criticism from people who care so much about norms or you wouldn't take advice from. If she wants to be brave let her. Just let her know that some people have very stereotypical and archaic views on gender but that doesn't mean she a. Has to have those views and b. Has to care about others having those views. There's nothing boyish about science or trucks or football (as the Liionesses continue to prove) neither are certain things like makeup and nurture only girlish. Otherwise why do news anchors, actors etc wear makeup and even the fact that makeup was created for men. She doesn't have those views clearly showing how society and patriarchy works hard to impose them on us as we grow.

I wouldn't allow it. This is a statement haircut and I would not let an 8 year old make a statement.

YANBU. It’s hair, it grows.

I wouldn’t have given it any thought until a few posters mentioned it but I agree at just double checking school policy re-hair as I know some schools are funny about certain things like boys not having shaved in patterns etc. I say this because even though hair grows it’s unlikely to have grown significantly by September and if she likes it you need to know if it can stay.

Let me guess. 100% happy to be heteronormative all over the place though?

All the identikit long straight haired clones aren’t ’branding themselves’.

yuk

My children are older now, but I've always taken the view that it's their hair and they can do what they like with it. If they don't like the style after they've got it, well, lesson learnt I guess.

I think it's a good idea to let them have control of meaningless stuff like clothes and hair styles and save parental control for when it's really needed.

My 9 year old also likes to mainly wear football kit when not at school so I warned her that with a pixie cut people might think she’s a boy. She said she didn’t care. And has been right that she didn’t care on the couple of occasions it’s happened (more so now it’s grown out). I love that she is true to herself rather than caring about societal norm expectations.

It also helped protect her from the nut epidemic this year for which I was thankful! And it meant she didn’t have to brush

My daughter has had nothing but compliments on her pixie cut. I am flabbergasted by some of the comments on here.

I’ve never decided what my daughter has looked like. She dislikes her brown hair so since she was 13 she has had her hair professionally coloured many times over the years at my expense - balayage, ginger, the lot. I certainly wouldn’t be paying or actively allowing her to have an extreme style like the OP’s DD wants though. My thoughts aside - it wouldn’t have even been allowed in DD’s school (for girls or boys!!)

If she wants it and it won't breach school rules then why not. It's just hair and will grow back.

We’ve regressed so far about girls’ appearance. The 80s and 90s girls could have anything from very short to very long. We’ve gone from Lady Di to Catherine. And not in a good way.

Not "weird" at all.

You might have had make-up, ear piercings, skin care products in mind...

Will it have time to grow back before new term?

You pay for dye on a child but not short hair?

Can anyone say ‘internalised misogyny’?

🤣🤣🤣

OP if you’re going to let her do it do it soon and it can grow in a bit before school starts.

I don’t like short, shaved hair on boys or girls. Not misogyny, just a dislike of chavvy looks.

A 13 year old with dyed hair is extreme.

Yes - a few natural looking blonde highlights were awfully extreme🤣

I would check if she won’t have any issues at school, but other than that it’s her hair. It grows back.

It’s laughable that some users seem to think it’s fine for their young daughters to dye their hair but lord forbid this one kid wants half of it shaved off.

Let her do it. It's her hair. My DG had his hair right down his back from 4yrs to 9yrs. Im a big believer in giving kids wings.

So is it “balayage, ginger, the lot” or a few highlights?

Surprised at the responses, it’s a haircut not a permanent tattoo. I’d allow her to do it but really emphasise that it will take a long time to grow back to one length.

It’s not shaved and it’s not half her head

Sinead O’Connor?

Balayage and highlights up until she was 18. She decided to trial a lovely, natural auburn/ginger at that point which suited her skin tone really well. Nothing extreme about DD thank god

You are a terrible parent for even contemplating this. But I imagine you are having a piss take.