Is it unreasonable to sell hand me downs?

[LuckyAquaExpert]

Would you feel it was cheeky to see your hand me downs on Vinted? It's weirdly making me feel sentimental/pissed off.

I'd rather have them back to pass on to someone else in need. I passed them on thinking I was helping

Did they use the items before selling them?
Contact them to say you would like to have them back after use.
Personally, if I give it away, it is gone, they can do what they like with it.
Next time let whoever is taking the clothing knows you want them back.

Depends if they have used them or not. If they’ve taken them off you but then just sold them I think they is cheeky. If they’ve used them for their kid and now are getting rid and are skint and could do with some spare cash I don’t see the harm. It’s hard to delver who gave whey sometimes

I would think it’s a bit weird that they were cashing in on my kindness - like you say, I’d rather they gave them to charity or someone else in need. If the items are good enough to sell, I’d at the very least ask the person that gave them to me if they want them back!

But at the same time maybe they really need the money and space and you did give them away, assuming no strings?

Yes, I agree. I would not give away something I was sentimental about. I give away things I want out the house and I don’t have time to sell myself. So my attitude is a bit ‘do what you like with it’. It’s better if it doesn’t end up in landfill.

Remember who gave what

I feel it's bad karma to profit off someone's kindness

Yes this is it. I’d never sell something someone gave me in kindness. I’d pass it on or give it back.

You should lend and not give if you don’t want the recipient to sell them. Or sell them yourself.

They were my sons and I passed them on thinking maybe they'd pass them onto someone else in need

Other bags I've given to charity shops/local womens refuge centre my neighbour works at, but this friend mentioned her son growing so fast, so I asked did she want clothing for him

They would be in a higher tax bracket and show no signs of financial troubles

You should have said that you expected these to be passed on.
Lesson learnt.

Good grief. Only on Mumsnet does everyone know the tax bracket of their friends and family. Who cares how much they earn? If you think they don’t need help then don’t give them your old clothes. Nice humble brag too about usually donating to the women’s refuge. Of course you do.

You surely don’t want them back. So what’s the problem?

Did their son wear them or did they pass them straight on? I won't lie it woudk piss me off and I think it's quite greedy but once you pass something on, its gone. People who sell things from charity shops, now they're evil!

Bit of an overreaction.

This is a colleague of mine. They're in a much higher position than me, our pay is publicly known

Not a humble brag either. It's a really handy way to clear out and many women on my street/area do as our neighbour collects these

If they they leave my house they are fair game. I could easily list items on vinted. Why don’t I? Because kids clothes go for a couple of pounds each. I am not bundling 4 kids in the car and buying packaging and cello tape for that amount of money.

I also see it as giving me back real estate soace in my house, which to me, is priceless. If you gave the clothes to help her then it is up to her what she does with them. If you can’t swallow this then don’t pass down anything else.

Nice humble brag too about usually donating to the women’s refuge

What a weird thing to say! Wtf. I give my DCs things to someone else I know or else to Hospice. Can't say I tell anyone, but why would it be a humble brag? Wtf is wrong with you

I'm not sure if he wore them. I've only met her son once and haven't seen him since or seen photos. She was thankful at the time and another colleague also passed on a bag of clothes to her

You pass it on, it's not yours to decide about what happens any further

Perhaps there was a reason for it, if she did it's probably becaue she felt she needed the money more than someone who needed the clothes. It's like people who go through clothing bins, it seems like they're stealing from those less fortunate but I guess they're the people it's meant for. At least the clothes will be used, that's the main thing.

I can see that just because someone is a higher level of management to me doesn't mean they might not need money. We're all struggling with the cost of living these days. I just meant they don't outwardly show signs of needing to sell hand me downs

When you give stuff away, you cut ties with it. Let it go.
You should not attach conditions to it.

I think that if a person plans on selling hand me downs and therefore profiting from them, it is good manners to ask the giver if they mind or offer them a cut of the money. Getting free clothes and getting use out of them - fine - but then selling for money is a bit much imo.

I wouldn’t give this colleague any more stuff.

People who sell things from charity shops, now they're evil!

I can’t get my head around this at all. What am I missing?

Do you mean if someone buys from a charity shop but then sells it on? Presumably the charity shop has already received the money for it.

Yep, the charity shop had the chance to sell something for a higher price.
They were given the items for free, and made money (even if undervalued). They have lost nothing. They prefer to have a high turnover of stock, rather than high value items clog up the rails for weeks at a time.

I give good quality clothes etc to a charity shop first and foremost so someone can get something they want/need for a low price and the bonus is the charity also makes money. I could sell it myself, but I prefer someone gets use from that item. Someone who goes and gets those items to sell for a higher price to me is a real low life as it means the person who needs the item misses out, and they're taking all the good stuff for themselves. Basically making a profit off people in need, that's just scummy to me.

Charity shops are not for people in need... they are to raise money for the charity.

They sold the item, they get the money. What someone does with it after is up to them.