Not to share inflatables by the pool

[Sally20099]

We’re on our summer holiday in Europe. During our Easter holiday two children started playing with DD float (a giant mermaid) and it got a puncture during their rough play. This was on day 3 and DD was rightly upset. This holiday I said she didn’t have to let anyone borrow her new inflatable if she didn’t want to but if she made friends or wanted to make friends she should IF they ask. So far three children have just randomly grabbed and started playing with her stuff (twice it was by the pool but once it was by our sunbeds!). We have always been happy to share if people ask if they can play, borrow or join in, but right in front of their parents they are just grabbing our stuff and playing with it. I understand children will do this but I expect the parents to say something like “this isn’t yours, put it back” or “have you asked if you can play with it because it isn’t yours”. I think this behaviour is unbelievably entitled from children and parents so now I keep it by my sunbed the entire time it’s not in use. People just taking stuff that doesn’t belong to them with out asking is a tigger for me so I’m trying to under if my reaction is fair or am I just an uptight killjoy?

That’s so unfriendly and embarrassing for you. I’m a bit surprised by this thread in general. Surely it’s natural for children to pick up and play with things that are lying around a pool, and want to play with each other and use each others toys. That’s how they make friends. If they wanted something back to play with then you can go and ask nicely?

although I do agree taking them from a sun bed is not on

When we took my little one away last year, they started playing with kids toys by the pool. They were too young to understand that these toys werent theirs. But the lovely kids/parents at the pool let them play with them every day. This year we have been away and we bought lots of pool toys to take with us after our previous experience. We had them at the side of the pool and lots of kids played with them throughout the week. It was nice for all the kids to share together and we felt we were giving back due to others sharing with our little one on our previous holiday.
I understand if kids are breaking things, but if not then why does it matter if kids play with toys that aren't theirs? If no one is using it and they are in the pool then let them play! It seems mean to begrudge them if your DC isnt playing with it at that time.

Unfriendly yes, embarrassing no. I don’t want to ‘make friends’ on holiday. I don’t want other peoples feral kids taking my kids stuff and breaking it. I wouldn’t go and take someone else’s sun cream. Or just borrow someone else’s towel to dry myself. Children should be taught not to take someone else’s toys. I would never allow my children to play with another child’s toy or inflatable. It’s ridiculously rude

Only if you have the money to replace them not everybody does.

This annoys me - people shouldn't lift it from your lounger . My kids find it upsetting too as it is awkward. It always happens , I would never dream of letting my kids pick up random toys by the pool.

I would lose my shit if someone took my inflatable from my sun lounger. So rude.

Had this happen on a beach 30+ years ago. DC about 13 months. Brats from the space next door just stroll over and take the bucket, spade and other stuff. Mother said nothing and looked on indulgently at her 5 and 7 year old kids

DC just climbed back into the pushchair. I didn't know what to say and have berated myself forever for not saying anything but you know new parent etc etc

Anyway they left the toys alone after a while and I retrieved them. Never let it happen again

Some parents are real shits, they wouldn't stand for it happening to their kids

YANBU

We went to a paddling pool recently and some of ds2’s classmates were there. We have a boat inflatable. They quite happily all played with it for about an hour or so and then ds2 had had enough because he wanted to play with it with just ds1 so after that they stopped sharing. A couple of the mums said thank you to ds2 for letting their children share. No issue.

It's the adults faults. In my experience some "grown ups" are more entitled and grabby than small children are.

We had a run in on a holiday once with a "Gang-gad" (kid called him that and all the grown ups loudly used it as a real name, including gang-gad himself in the third person) and his little princess. He was FURIOUS that my child politely declined letting his little spoilt madam have a go on the inflatable my child was happily and carefully playing with. My son was so upset and anxious after that, having a grown man shouting and screaming all red faced at a little boy and his mum. Dickhead.

I'd seen them have a run in the day before with two young teenage girls who had sat on "their" sunloungers.

Some people are just twats. Call them out on it, and don't engage in any drama, just move away if things get irate.

Nah you can’t be precious about this kind of stuff

Oh this thread reminds me of when we went on holiday to centre parcs when ds1 was about 2 and an older kid snatched his bucket and spade off him saying “you have to share!!!!!!”

Do you have any idea of the cost (and inconvenience) of replacements. Let alone having to blow the damn things up. But good for you - keep spending 30-40 euros each time some random kid destroys something that belongs to you.

I really dint think people think it’s for everyone to enjoy.

They do the same at our local swimming pool with noodles. And there’s no way those are provided by the pool.

its much more than children want them and parents dint want to spend all their time saying No or to go and buy one for their dc instead. Much easier to use whatever there is around right?

And writing your name in big letters won’t work.
And you shouldn’t have to guard your stuff that closely.

You're not being unreasonable, I can't imagine watching my children grab someone else's float if they know it's owned. It can be tricky if they're loose in the pool or sat on the side with no clear owner - i've seen loads that are nobodies, left by previous guests or hotel supplied so i wouldn't pull my kids up on grabbing those, but when they're by your sunbed that's basically stealing, can they wear her sunglasses or use your suncream too, clearly not. If you want to keep them safe, put them by or under your sunbed and be firm.
If she's playing with the kids then it will be much harder to say no, because she'll want to use it whilst hanging with her new friends, I think at that point she should share. It'd be a bit like not offering to get a round in when sat at a table with friends.
I'd be firmly saying "sorry they're ours not the hotels" every single time, you can't expect your daughter to.

Practice fuck off in all different languages... I hate people who assume they can use our stuff.

Yanbu we've never shared inflatables but have passed them on to others when we leave

Sounds like you are talking about someone elses money?

I think it's pretty dreadful that the parents aren't paying enough attention to what their children are doing not to wonder where they've got the toys from. A simple, 'That's nice. Where did you find that?' would solve the problem.

In that case, their parents who should be watching them, should have told them right after the first time to put it back because they’re someone else and not there to share with everyone.

No children can’t just know. But their parents should. And they should also parent rather than let them behave like entitied so and so.

No I don’t share my kids things with others. I would ask for it back and then if it kept happening I would speak to the parents and ask they talk to their children.

You mean you are one of those parents who don’t buy inflatables for their dc and rely on other parents to do so so your child can ‘borrow’ them instead…

And maybe you’ve taught your dc it’s essential to share too p, even with strangers. So theyre now helping themselves with other people toys telling them ‘sharing is kind’. That would be a logical progression too,

Ermmmmm because they’re not cheap these inflatables 🤣 we spent 34€ on one in Greece a few months ago! We did pass it onto a family we’d got chatting to who had arrived the day before we left but still, they can be expensive and there will always be CF parents who will let their kids just take someone else’s!

Sharing is caring, my arse it is 👿😡

Never, ever seen this in the whole of my life. It’s not a thing.