Are you allowed carers leave for this??

[CalmFawn]

My DD is 5. She’s had a small lump on her face for a few months that the GP said was a cyst but it’s grown suddenly and we’ve found out this week it’s a tumour. She needs to have some tests and scans over the next few weeks and the date for removal is in 2 weeks.

am I allowed any carers leave for this? My boss says no as it’s not an emergency as it’s ’pre booked’ but I think a tumour is quite a big thing?! And the only reason it’s not being removed asap as they need to do other tests first. I’m not allowed to take annual leave or unpaid leave as it’s August and fully booked

should I accept that I can’t take any leave?

im waiting to hear back from HR but though I’d ask here to see if anyone has any opinions

I work for the nhs but can’t find the trust policies online

thank you

Call the working families help line on Monday Monday

Parental Leave - Working Families https://share.google/H2F5xHysKHweaBLJb

Carer's leave would be specific to your employer - you can ask for unpaid parental leave in blocks of a week at a time but not a single day.

Of course you can!

Surely pre booked would mean a regular dentists appointment or routine check up. This sounds urgent.

Good luck, hope everything is ok x

I don’t know what the official rules are, they probably vary company to company.
But what I can say is my sister had something very similar when her child was 4, and her own GP signed her off for a month because her employer was being objectionable. Job done.

Technically I think your boss is right, but morally that's awful I can't believe they won't give you the day!!! I hope your daughter is ok

Would they let you swap a day?

Go on sick leave with stress. That your boss is being such an arse about it at such a stressful time is disgusting.

I agree with GP. You’ll be in no fit state to work and your daughter needs you.

wow, your boss is a total arse. Imagine not supporting you at this time. What a dick move.

As @MyUmberSeal says. Legally, your employer doesn’t have to give you leave. You either take a block of a week unpaid dependents leave, or have emergency leave as an odd day to sort out childcare. Neither of which helps.

Working parents who need to take time off for medically ill children end up either using all their annual leave or as @MyUmberSeal says, our GP would always sign me off sick due to stress. And it was always bloody stressful anyway.

Carer's leave is not applicable in these circumstances, neither is emergency dependant leave. Your only choice is parental leave, but you need to give 3 weeks notice and the employer can defer it. So really you're out of options unless you go off sick yourself.

Typical NHS.
I'd get signed off with stress, because you are bloody stressed.

I hope your DD is much better very soon.

Your boss would be technically correct according to our NHS trust's policy but is showing a complete lack of compassion. In every team I've worked in it would be expected you would get signed off sick with stress in this situation. Wishing you and your daughter all the best

I actually think it's reasonable to go to your GP and get signed off with stress for a couple of weeks in these circumstances.

Your boss is a horrible, shortsighted person regardless on any rules.

If you can't be given time off, go to your daughter & request a sick note on the basis of the stress you are feeling.

I hope everything turns out well for your daughter.

I would give compassionate leave in this case but this is very much at your manager's discretion unfortunately. I agree with others who say you should get signed off by your GP if your boss won't budge. You need to be with your daughter.

That's ridiculous. Of course you should be entitled to leave!
You need to speak to hr or a union.

In my Trust you would take unpaid leave (even if others were on annual leave)
the policy in your Trust is likely to be similar but check it.
your manager may be incorrect - check policy and hopefully HR will confirm how you can take this time.
its not very compassionate of your manager, hope your dc is ok

I was under the impression carers leave was absolutely for things like this and the length of time discretionary depending on the circumstances.
Your manager should be giving you CL for the first week and allowing AL for the week after imo.

Where I work, carer’s leave is paid for 2 days and is for emergency leave only, not for pre-planned leave. For example, I didn’t get carer’s leave when I had to accompany my husband to a colonoscopy under sedation. You will have to use annual leave. I’m sorry for your situation but I’m constantly amazed how many people don’t read their company’s policies. You will probably find it is clearly explained in there.

I’d be more than happy to use annual leave but unfortunately I can’t as it’s August and too many people are off. I just don’t think a tumour removal can be classed as pre planned. She’s currently an inpatient and we’re just having the necessary tests.

If HR do say no to the leave then I think sick leave is the way forward, as everyone else has said

You've had good accurate advice above. No legally you are not entitled to anything.
If you are so stressed that you are unable to work, your Dr may agree to sign you off. I know that doesn't help those of us on statutory sick pay.

Thanks everyone!

I’ll wait for HR to get back in touch on Monday and I’ll get in touch with the GP if they can’t allow the one day off. Realistically I think a few weeks of sickness would be better anyway. DD is currently an inpatient and our stress levels are unreal!

thank you for the well wishes 💕

'For example, I didn’t get carer’s leave when I had to accompany my husband to a colonoscopy under sedation.'

But he isn't your child, the op is her dc's primary carer. Anyone could've accompanied your dh.

I think patental/ caers leave is dependent on company policy and you might only get a few days
Personally with something this potentially serious I would go sick if it you get sick pay.