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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To expect my neighbour to stop her son playing the recorder in the garden?

158 replies

Alonero · 14/07/2025 20:34

Not sure if I’m being precious but I need a sanity check.

Next door’s little boy (8ish?) has taken up the recorder and every single evening he’s out in the garden squeaking away. He’s clearly just learning – bless him – but it’s the same few notes over and over, really loud and really shrill. It’s been going on for a couple of weeks now and honestly it’s starting to drive me up the wall.

We’ve had all the windows open with the heat and it’s impossible to relax. You can’t have a conversation in the kitchen without it sounding like you’re being heckled by a flock of geese. I tried to hint to his mum the other day – said something like “ooh, we’ve been treated to quite the performance lately” – and she just laughed and said he’s a musical genius in the making. Right.

I don’t want to be the grumpy neighbour who ruins a kid’s joy but surely there’s a time and a place? Or at least… maybe indoors with the windows shut?

AIBU to think a bit of peace in your own garden isn’t too much to ask?

OP posts:
Barney16 · 15/07/2025 20:16

There was a programme on Radio 4 today called Rocking the Recorder
"Susan Calman celebrates one of the most misunderstood and misrepresented music instruments of all time - the recorder. "

MarySueSaidBoo · 15/07/2025 20:17

Buy an air horn and join in. Say you're practising for an event.

CeciliaMars · 15/07/2025 20:35

I’m very impressed that any kid will practise the recorder for 30-40 mins a night!!

cardibach · 15/07/2025 22:16

Londonmummy66 · 15/07/2025 17:36

In my experience only the harp manages to sound good in the hands of a beginner and only if someone else has tuned it.

Obviously. Beginners are shit. I was responding to someone saying recorders can’t sound good even in the hands of an expert.

Lansonmaid · 15/07/2025 22:48

Fifthtimelucky · 14/07/2025 22:55

Rubbish. The recorder is absolutely a great instrument in the right hands, though of course bigger recorders are generally easier on the ear than the descant recorders usually used in primary schools.

Recorders are the perfect starter instrument: they are very cheap, need little if any maintenance, and, though lightweight, are virtually indestructible!

Agreed. The recorder can be lovely, there’s a group called Palisander who play beautiful music. But when it’s overblown by kids just starting out it can be a bit of a torture

Freud2 · 15/07/2025 23:17

Alonero · 14/07/2025 20:44

He usually goes for about 30–40 mins, sometimes longer if he’s “composing” (his word, not mine). It’s always early evening so we’re trying to cook, get DC bathed etc and it’s just constant tooting.

You’re probably right that his mum’s had enough indoors and shoves him out. Might try the music idea – maybe a bit of ABBA will drown it out and encourage a duet 😅

Also very relieved to hear recorder stardom isn’t a big pipeline – if this is a short phase I’ll grit my teeth and get through it!

It would drive me mad. Unfortunately there are very few neighbours in my long experience of different houses, that are considerate. I'm always aware of annoying neighbours in any way but have never had that thoughtfulness back.

Freud2 · 15/07/2025 23:19

CelestialGazer · 14/07/2025 22:08

ABBA? How about “Thank You for the Music”?

Definitely have a proper word with the neighbours about how irritating it is.

nonevernotever · 17/08/2025 19:28

SprayWhiteDung · 14/07/2025 21:36

How many top flight professional recorder players do you know of, though? Ones who release solo albums?

At least something like an ocarina would be much kinder for a starter instrument.

Dozens and dozens! It's increasingly recognised as a proper instrument in it's own right.

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