AIBU to think my boss is unbelievably stingy and dodgy with money?

[toohotodayy]

I work in a small team and my boss is one of the tightest people I have ever met despite being on a high salary. Her husband earns a 6 figure salary. She claims back everything I mean every tiny little thing. £2 train snack? She will claim it. £1 car park fee. She will claim it.

Recently, we were all given a £30 allowance for a work lunch (rare treat). Most of us used it to get a proper meal. She bought the cheapest lunch possible basically a sandwich and water and spent the rest on chocolate bars for her kids. She actually asked the restaurant for a non itemised receipt so she could still claim the full amount.

She has also stopped providing tea and coffee in the office apparently due to budget constraints. Yet she has applied for funding to travel to the US for research despite not being a researcher Her boss approved it because he just likes an easy life and never pushes back.

AIBU to think this is ridiculous or is this just how things work in offices now?

Could she be buying tea and coffee claiming money but keeping it for herself? I think when you’re giving gifts of tea you should say ooh lovely or go to her boss and ask why tea and coffee are not allowed anymore? Bit tight the company not letting staff being allowed hot drinks if they can afford lunches and other expenses.

I can’t see the difference to be honest. If that was one of my employees and I gave everyone a thirty quid allowance and one had a fillet steak and a glass of wine of red, and one bought a happy meal and 20 Mars bars for her kids, I couldn’t give a toss. It’s a perk, spend it how you see fit.

I worked in a supermarket years ago (mid 90s) and lots of companies used luncheon vouchers. The premise being you spent them on lunch. But lots customers would save them up over the course of a few weeks or even months and take them off a big family shop. At Christmas loads of people spent luncheon vouchers built up over the year.

She’s being savvy, it’s not tight if it doesn’t affect anyone else. Treating your kids to chocolate bars is quite sweet.

I have lived in a few countries and behaviour like this can be common,not performed by all,but still common. Because historically the culture may value family thriftiness. Hong Kong comes to mind as does Aberdeenshire UK. Given some cultures value this approach to life, then fine by her to do that ,others have another approach.

The tea and coffee was bought via work so she is not claiming for that. If budget is so tight, I don't understand why she spent quite a bit of money on chocolate for her kids.

This is interesting as she is Chinese.

Claiming for allowed expenses is totally fair. The rest seams incredibly tight

Well given the possible cultural background probably a large cultural element, her Mum likely taught her to act frugally prioritising finding things by any way possible for the family and being careful with every penny (very likely her granny would also have reaffirmed this approach when she was a kid) . One or two of the more modern young folk within her own family may privately at home tease her about this attitude. But they respect it ,she is out to fight for their family in every matter anyway without breaking the law. Hence one common nickname 'the Tigress'. I think anyone who is willing to do this knowing full well some people may laugh/dislike her and behind her back and deride her, deserves respect. She probably thinks "The family comes first my own personal status comes second. "

Put in your suggestion box that non-itemised receipts should never be honoured for expenses- the other things are, her choice. Have your own tea/coffee in the office but make sure she can't use it.

I went on a work trip to San Francisco, and there were more than a few eyebrows raised by various staff in our small org. I daresay a few bitchy comments too - and my line manager didn't initially give me lieu, even though I travelled on two Saturdays and worked 5am-5pm each day.

I still use what I learned there YEARS later, and really improved several things at work - well in excess of the costs of the training and intel I received. And I hadn't had anything spent on PD in years.

In my experience, the people sneering and looking sideways at things like this are usually not the high-performers - they're too busy trying to make sure no one else gets a speck more than them.

This wouldn't concern me one bit. They're allowed to claim and they are doing so. You can do the same thing. If I saw her pulling that receipt trick in the restaurant, I'd take it as fair game. Get a Tesco egg mayo, spend the rest on fags and booze! What difference does it make whether the money went to a restaurant or a supermarket?

I agree.

When people are working out of town they already make significant sacrifices and quibbling over a bar of chocolate or glass of wine on a lunch bill is self defeating from a business perspective. Where we cross charge, clients know the limits but only we have the detailed receipts (if they are available). Detailed receipts simply go into the audit process in the event of any query, they don’t exist to “catch people out” buying chocolate instead of a three course dinner.

For non client chargeable “team lunches” I expect them to use the budget - again, I don’t care if they eat pizza, watercress or chocolate. The money is for them to enjoy in a team setting, not to impose my idea of suitable eating.

As far as I can see, the OP’s complaints consist of the LM having a high earning husband, being approved for business travel which the OP doesn’t like, claiming entirely legitimate expenses under HMRC rules and cutting tea and coffee from the company budget.

As you say - high performers don’t spend their time monitoring and whinging about fellow staff claiming allowable expenses after being told to buy their own tea and coffee.

The lunch/chocolate bar thing is fraud on your employer. That would be a sackable offence in most companies.

Some people just take the piss.

The chocolate thing is fraud. The tea gifts thing is also probably against bribery and corruption policy. People have been sacked for less, even in ostensibly generous employers

In my experience, the people sneering and looking sideways at things like this are usually not the high-performers - they're too busy trying to make sure no one else gets a speck more than them.

Not in the case. She approves some of the expenses of the team and is incredibly strict. Definitely making sure no one else gets a speck more than they should while ignoring this herself.

The only example you cite which could remotely approach this is buying chocolate as part of her team lunch allowance. Unless you have a corporate rule prohibiting someone spending part of their team lunch allowance on chocolate you are whistling in the wind.

You have already made it clear that she wasn’t exceeding the allowance and bought a very cheap lunch whilst the rest of you spent the money on more expensive food and drink.

Everything else is just whining.

<awaits next drip feed>

This is so evidently untrue that it's barely worth refuting. I'll just say that most of the very wealthy people I know have become wealthy precisely because they were not very interested in money.

The merely prosperous are often savvy with money.

But in my experience, those who have come from poor backgrounds to serious wealth have been disinterested - and even cavalier - with money all the way up.

It is against policy to spend part of team lunch allowance on food that is not to be eaten there and then. Hence why specifically asked for a non itemised receipt.

I’d agree that it is very hard to have respect for someone like this whether what she is doing is ‘savvy’ or not.

OP have you considered leaving your job you obviously aren't happy and have deeper issues around your job,company or manager. If you're getting so wound up with her over a bit of chocolate etc.

It is not worth leaving my job over. It is a good workplace despite her dishonesty over the expenses.

I assume you do not have to go out for work? £1 here and £2 for parking, add that up over a month and we'd be looking at a hefty bill, no doubt.

The best thing I ever did was stop claiming expenses and get a company credit card. No more forgotten claims, no more. Oh, it's just a few quid. No more waiting for expenses to be paid, anywhere from £50 to £300 per month. Not that my place has ever been slow, and I would often get paid back the same day. but not all places are like this. No more having to dip into my own bank to book hotels if I got caught out on a late call, and no one in the office to book my hotel.

As I said, I would rather be potless than do it.

The OP made it sound like it was little one-offs here and there.
Not regularly between £50-£300 a month -there’s quite a difference.

Yep, there is a big difference. I should have said, I've let stuff slide in the past because I can't be bothered about it, much like mileage claims for running into town or dropping stuff off at the accountant's.

The person does sound a little (lot) weird TBH, if there were truly no budget for tea and coffee, they would not be £30 being dished out for lunch.

Tea budgets cause so much stress in offices, any decent office, that's not a public service, should just have a policy of tell me what you need, I'll order it, simple.

We have a linked amazon and Iceland account at work, when stuff is getting low, log in, pop an order on. job done.

Wthe chocolate bars you have to wonder why she doesn’t buy the train snacks (as in chocolate bars) and save them for her kids?

Seems legit, but it for later and don’t eat it. Then eating it later or giving it to someone else is natural. Done deliberately, this is sneaky. Lunch expense buying for kids is just fraud.