SHADE NEEDED

[ClematisPurple]

Please help, I'm dying of heat stress.
The back of my house is WEST FACING.
It is sheer hell in this heat.
The kitchen is in the back of the house.
I'm going to pieces unable to cope with the blinding tortuous sun beaming directly in through my kitchen window and back door (next to window) every single solitary day when I'm trying to make dinner.
It's so hellishly, tortuously, insanely bright and intense that I get sunburn whilst standing at my kitchen worktop preparing a meal, the backs of my calves actually burn, and I have to wear sunglasses in my kitchen, and still I am squinting like mad and getting migraines from the intensity of the sun shining in to my eyes as it shines directly in to my kitchen at 5pm, 6pm, 7pm.
My kitchen sink faces the west facing window.
My kitchen is a shitty little tiny box kitchen 10ft long x 7.5ft wide and the back wall of the kitchen is all glass because the massive window and 100% top to bottom glass door take up the full width of the entire wall of the kitchen that faces west, and I HATE IT.
We are elevated on a hill, with no natural sun screen i.e. no trees. We are completely exposed to the elements.
I feel like I'm going insane.
I can't use my kitchen between 4pm - 8pm every day in this heat.
Outside my kitchen is our tiny patio only 18 feet wide and we are boxed in by tall brick walls since my next door neighbour that we are joined on to got a 4 metre rear extension which has created a breeze less sun trap at the back of our house. I hate it. We used to have air circulating at the back of our house bit their massive rear extension has stopped this.
Today, preparing dinner for DC at 5pm made me feel sick. I still feel ill now. I got sunburnt whilst cooking at my hob/oven becausethe sun hits my oven as it drops down lower in the sky. I got a migraine from standing at the kitchen sink washing up because the sun sank lower in the sky until it was straight opposite my window above the sink.
I bought a gazebo from argos and stood it against the back of the house. It helped. It lasted 4 days then we had a windy day on Saturday and the frame snapped and it collapsed.
What should I do?
Please advise me on what is better for this situation - another gazebo or a patio awning?
What is best?
I feel ill with heat stress even now at nearly 10pm, after getting in such a state in the kitchen earlier.

Hang a dark sheet up as a curtain?

can you hang up a bed sheet ?

nail it up there if necessary !

On hot days, use a slow cooker in another room, just do salad and cold meats, salad and quiche etc. Don't cook when it's unbearable. My kitchen is hot. Then don't do dishes until later in the evening when it's cooler.

Keep the windows shut when it's hot outside. Hang a white sheet OUTSIDE the windows to block out the sun and stop the glass windows acting like a greenhouse.

Close the blinds?

Mirror window film?

we bought paper blinds from IKEA. Dead cheap and they have their own stick back plastic strip to hold them up i'll look for a link

Get a fan for your kitchen. Think about an air con unit.

Cold food, don’t cook!

And yeah, fuck cooking in this heat. Sandwiches and salad for tea here!

How?
The shit over sized window and the shit top to bottom glass back door which takes up the full back wall of the kitchen is surrounded by shitty thick white upvc framing.
How and where do I attach a sheet?
I'm going out of my m8nd, I can't cope.
I've still got a bad headache from 5 hours ago.

I see your west facing and I raise you south facing new build 😂

It was 26 degrees outside at 8pm.

The corridor, yes corridor, outside my flat is 30 degrees at 10pm.

I’ve bought some stick-on paper blinds for my windows as a temporary solution. They keep out the sunlight and it stays cooler. Also close windows when it’s very hot.

You ate your neighbour? 🤣 Sorry, made me laugh.
I would suggest an awning and a white blind, plus a fan.
Do you have an air fryer? Microwave? Using the oven will make it even hotter.

You nail it into the brickwork above the window and the door.

Can't do a link for some reason but they're called SCHOTISS and available on amazon - £7 each. You can use them side by side full size or cut them down to be narrower.

Calm down for a start. If you’re broke, go to
tbe charity shop and buy a big duvet or table cloth or something, and then nail it to the outside of your window. You’ll be ok. Dont cook hot stuff in the heat, cold foods only.

Prepare just one meal for everyone rather than cooking for your Dc and then yourself later. Make easy and quick food, with lots of cold dinners, a r prepare the meals earlier in the morning when it’s cooler. No need to stand for ages in a hot kitchen cooking hot food.

I can sympathise, we have a huge glass wall facing south into our kitchen diner. What helps is planning no cook/minimal cook meals. We are living off hot smoked salmon (open the pack and put on plate) with microwaved tender stem broccoli (3 mins tops). Or a ready cooked chicken and a pack of ready cooked lentils warmed up in 45 seconds in microwave. Lots of variations on this. If I had to stand in the kitchen longer than 5 minutes I think I would go mad.

Quick cheap temporary, buy a roll of window film. It's meant to give clear glass a frosted effect. You cut it to size, spray the window with water, peel off the backing and hang it on the window like hanging wallpaper. Use a squeegee to get rid of air bubbles. It cuts the worst of the glare out, and some of the heat. You might want to leave a window clear to still have an outside view. I think I got mine from b&q I'll check

they just stick onto the pvc

Item 1

can you afford a portable air con unit? Years of trying stuff in a high rise flat facing south west - waste of time and money. Portable air con will get you from about 32 to 27 degrees.

also i stuck cardboard on the windows in the 2018 heatwave.

item 2 - don't be cooking.

Could you maybe tape one up somehow with really strong tape.
Or attach it on the outside - nails in the bricks as others have suggested.

Oh dear that sounds horrific! I have no helpful advice but poor you

There is literally nowhere to put one.
Ive got the shittest tiniest cupboard sized kitchen in the world and every wall is boxed in by floor to ceiling units. The floor space is about 4ft x 3ft.
And then I'm trapped in there in an inferno of west facing heat.
I effing hate it.

When you do have to be in there get one of those fans that go around your neck.
At least you'll get a bit of a breeze on you.
Put seriously - no hot cooking.
If there was ever a time for microwave meals - this is it.