SHADE NEEDED

[ClematisPurple]

Please help, I'm dying of heat stress.
The back of my house is WEST FACING.
It is sheer hell in this heat.
The kitchen is in the back of the house.
I'm going to pieces unable to cope with the blinding tortuous sun beaming directly in through my kitchen window and back door (next to window) every single solitary day when I'm trying to make dinner.
It's so hellishly, tortuously, insanely bright and intense that I get sunburn whilst standing at my kitchen worktop preparing a meal, the backs of my calves actually burn, and I have to wear sunglasses in my kitchen, and still I am squinting like mad and getting migraines from the intensity of the sun shining in to my eyes as it shines directly in to my kitchen at 5pm, 6pm, 7pm.
My kitchen sink faces the west facing window.
My kitchen is a shitty little tiny box kitchen 10ft long x 7.5ft wide and the back wall of the kitchen is all glass because the massive window and 100% top to bottom glass door take up the full width of the entire wall of the kitchen that faces west, and I HATE IT.
We are elevated on a hill, with no natural sun screen i.e. no trees. We are completely exposed to the elements.
I feel like I'm going insane.
I can't use my kitchen between 4pm - 8pm every day in this heat.
Outside my kitchen is our tiny patio only 18 feet wide and we are boxed in by tall brick walls since my next door neighbour that we are joined on to got a 4 metre rear extension which has created a breeze less sun trap at the back of our house. I hate it. We used to have air circulating at the back of our house bit their massive rear extension has stopped this.
Today, preparing dinner for DC at 5pm made me feel sick. I still feel ill now. I got sunburnt whilst cooking at my hob/oven becausethe sun hits my oven as it drops down lower in the sky. I got a migraine from standing at the kitchen sink washing up because the sun sank lower in the sky until it was straight opposite my window above the sink.
I bought a gazebo from argos and stood it against the back of the house. It helped. It lasted 4 days then we had a windy day on Saturday and the frame snapped and it collapsed.
What should I do?
Please advise me on what is better for this situation - another gazebo or a patio awning?
What is best?
I feel ill with heat stress even now at nearly 10pm, after getting in such a state in the kitchen earlier.

A big sheet hung over the window. Buy sticky back Velcro so you can attach to the pvc window frame.

Our next door neighbour has a permanent brick built awning attached to their kitchen window. (We are south-west facing.) I spend about 50 weeks a year looking at it horrified (it must be so dark in their kitchen in January). And about 2 weeks a year so jealous of it I could spit! We are currently in the 2 weeks.

I totally get it, I got sunburnt in our kitchen in that 2018 heatwave. Long term get black out blind fitted door & window. Now get some blackout fabric shade stuff off Amazon silver side faces out black on inside. Double sided sticky velcro to attach it works wonders

Anti-Migraine freezer mask from Amazon, tenner. Gel hairband you chill & pull over your forehead like Batman.

Glorious. You look way cool too.

Well it's definitely better than the standard £12.99 fans and it has a mister that sprays a light mist while blasting you so I'm pretty cold right now 😆
It's not just blowing hot air around, it has cold air coming out of it.
I do think £99 for a fan that isn't gold plated is a bit ridiculous but it's a godsend tonight so I'm giving it a thumbs up x

For the longer term plant some trees if you can. The difference between our house temp and the next door neighbour who has no tree is unbelievable.

A silver birch will grow fast!

Perfect fit blinds? Or a curtain fixed to the PVC frame?

No, nobody buys ready made quiche, that’s why they keep making them…

Hate to break it to you.

Book yourself in a budget hotel with air conditioning for a night. Get a really good night sleep- then make plans on how to add shade- perhaps a sail outside covering your outdoor space?

Ive not RTFT but get a sail shade, absolute game-changer, I can’t recommend it highly enough! You can get the from Amazon for about £50, or if you need something made to measure to fit the outside fitting points you can get more expensive ones bespoke. we are south facing with massive bifolds and had to get one custom made to fit - we have a triangle with two points on the back wall and a third on a tree. It’s been worth every penny.
I also like to think it gives an Ibiza chill-out vibe 🤣
www.coversandall.co.uk/solar-shades/sun-shade-sail/classic-sun-shade-sail-sc

We are S facing and have an awning, it makes a HUGE difference. Shade sail would be a cheaper version.

Just do quick ready to eat food or food that can be done in the microwave. We don’t put the oven on in hot weather. Go and have a cool shower. It’ll help you think straight because at the moment you’re making a problem where there doesn’t have to be one.

I use thick electrical tape and stick it to the frame.

Silver survival blankets attached to the outside of the window with tape made my similarly furnace-like kitchen several degrees cooler. They weigh nothing so don't need much to hold them up. The trick is to prevent the heat coming in hence blocking from outside. We have blackout blinds but the heat is already in by then.

If you can't attach something outside, is there any reason why you can't at least put up blinds inside?

Thanks for breaking (not braking it to me. I don't like quiche, but given that the OP is struggling massively I'm thinking she might stoop to a one off upf quiche. Thanks though.

Op, pre cooked mackerel, naked ham (no nitrates), cheeses, boil eggs earlier in the day when it's not so hot in your kitchen.. any cold protein. Then salad and bread (obvs non upf, sourdough here because that's the aim of the game)

Use masking tape to attach tin foil to the window. You'll need to cook with the lights on but it will be less hot.

Can you do the cooking when its cooler, and then just reheat in the microwave when needed?

https://www.ikea.com/gb/en/p/schottis-block-out-pleated-blind-dark-grey-90369507/

Hate to brake it to you, but even quiche needs to be cooked.
unless of course you mean buy a shop bought upf quiche, but they are revolting I don’t think anyone does that.

This is one of the most pathetic derailments of a thread to make a snobbish, silly point, I have ever seen. Nobody makes their own quiche ffs unless it's for their grandson's christening. Saying you would shun shop-bought quiche is not a flex, especially for someone who can't spell, and especially... on a thread that is nothing to do with quiche!!!

Stick on blackout blinds?

Can you make a salad-type meal in advance so you don't need to be in the kitchen at that time?

Plants on the windowsill - they absorb heat and look nice too.

Plants everywhere lower the temp in the heat and raise it when you’re cold.

Waitrose veggie quiche looks pretty non upf to me. Eat it guilt free and without braking a sweat op.

https://www.waitrose.com/ecom/products/waitrose-mediterranean-inspired-vegetable-quiche/416651-586382-586383

Budget option is a roll of this cut to size

https://amzn.eu/d/0afcIFo

You can afix it using masking tape which won’t leave marks when removed.

If it was bothering me that much, I'd tape one of the best insulators of all on the outside of the glass. Newspapers, to hell with what it looks like.

To anyone comparing the OP's plight to South facing, it's nothing to afternoon and evening sun from the West. It's like the sun has moved in with you.

I’ve got one of those in my kids room. It’s Tommee Tippee and it’s HUGEwith brilliant suckers. It’s been an absolute lifesaver this summer.