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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Feeling pressure to send Dd to holiday club

53 replies

Diggingforgold · 09/07/2025 14:38

I don’t work during the summer holidays and have Dd, 6 with me at home. We have a nice back garden, trampoline, pool etc. She plays with two friends nearby 2-3 times per week. The other days we take our dog for walks, go on bike rides, bake, do some art, watch films, go to the beach, shopping, cafes, parks/playgrounds etc
I’m noticing that friends are sending their kids to holiday clubs, even those who don’t need to for reasons of needing to work etc. They say kids get bored without other kids.
I can maybe afford to do a day or two per week, do kids need this, especially with my Dd being an only?
I never went to holiday clubs and our mum didn’t do nearly as many activities or days out as I do, I did have a brother and sister though

OP posts:
Original poster
Diggingforgold · 09/07/2025 14:54

Anyone

OP posts:
Octavia64 · 09/07/2025 14:57

No.

i’m a teacher and mine went to holiday clubs if my term was longer than theirs but not otherwise.

absolutely not necessary.

Rayqueen · 09/07/2025 14:57

Why feel pressured I think it's lovely your spending time with your child that you will cherish years later. Ours don't go to clubs etc and we have a very similar lovely time, garden days, beach, picnics etc and there happy as anything

Caramelty · 09/07/2025 14:57

No, your dd does not need this. Speaking as a working mum whose kids need a holiday club - I would much rather they could decompress at home for the hols!

Could you offer to the parents of one of these bored friends to have their dc for a whole day and take a trip out together? Maybe you could even have two friends for a day and do activities at home with them

Or if the mums are available all spend the day together!

Cutleryclaire · 09/07/2025 14:59

Does she want to go? Otherwise there’s no way I’d be doing it out of thinking it’s something that should be done.

mrssunshinexxx · 09/07/2025 15:00

I don’t work but I send my 2 1 or 2 days a week to gymnastics as it’s their hobby too and they would be bored all summer long I have a 9 month old too so we can’t just do what they want all the time if they are at home , it works quite well

Dontwanttobeanebsnamum · 09/07/2025 15:02

Not needed unless there is some thing they want to do with friends eg art club.

My kids are doing 3 days of morning for the whole holidays because they want to go.

Noshadowsinthedark · 09/07/2025 15:04

No, I would be enjoying the time with DD given the option!

notacooldad · 09/07/2025 15:04

You dont have to send her.
I would send her a couple of days if she wants to though, so she can stay in touch and connected with her friends and do some fun activities with them.

She might be glad of a break from you! (only joking!)

PolyVagalNerve · 09/07/2025 15:05

I’d ask your DD -
she happy or fancy a day or two at a particular club ??
it’s lovely you have the time with her and she has the option

Original poster
Diggingforgold · 09/07/2025 15:06

Rayqueen · 09/07/2025 14:57

Why feel pressured I think it's lovely your spending time with your child that you will cherish years later. Ours don't go to clubs etc and we have a very similar lovely time, garden days, beach, picnics etc and there happy as anything

I think because she’s an only? How many children do you have? I’m worried about the social aspect a little

OP posts:
minipie · 09/07/2025 15:07

Depends on the child. DC1 is very happy pottering at home and seeing the odd friend. DC2 wants to be kept busy and have other children around permanently (her sister doesn’t count apparently) she always loved a holiday club! But if it’s a financial stretch I really don’t think it’s necessary.

Moveoverdarlin · 09/07/2025 15:07

If she wants to do it, maybe do one day a week. My kids couldn’t think of anything worse and love being home in the holidays.

Original poster
Diggingforgold · 09/07/2025 15:09

Noshadowsinthedark · 09/07/2025 15:04

No, I would be enjoying the time with DD given the option!

Oh for me I love spending time with her, I just wonder about socially?

OP posts:
Overthebow · 09/07/2025 15:09

She doesn’t need holiday clubs, but does need some social interaction with children her own age. You say she plays with some friends a couple of days each week though so would think that’s fine. Maybe see if there’s any clubs she wants to do for a couple of days but it’s not essential.

Bimblebombles · 09/07/2025 15:10

I'm sending my 6 year old to a holiday club one day a week in the summer hols - she is an incredibly chatty child who really enjoys socialising and is very active - I do it for the social interaction for her mainly. Gives her a change of scene and the opportunity to meet new friends.

I don't need anymore childcare than that as my Mum is having her one day a week and me and her Dad juggle the rest of the days between us (both of us are part time).

121gigawatts · 09/07/2025 15:12

No, I don't think they need to. I will be sending my eldest DD who is only 4 for one week in the summer holidays, not because I need to as we can manage the childcare between ourselves and luckily have GP's who like to have them but because she wants to go. It's her dance school one and my eldest is a very sociable child who has a real fear of missing out. I already know my youngest who is nearly 3 will be absolutely thrilled when the summer holidays come and will just want to be at home (she is very much like me) whilst my eldest is like her father who loves planned activities and socialising. If she's not expressed her interest to go and she doesn't need to go, then there is absolutely no need. I feel like summer camps didn't even exist where I lived as a child.

arcticpandas · 09/07/2025 15:24

It depends on your child. I have two ds: one energetic who loved all the activities at the holiday club and one who absolutely hated it. The latter is very sociable but he preferred a calmer environment. So it really depends. If I were you I don't think I would send her in ; she's only 6 and mum is still the favo person to be with + you said she had friends in the neighbourhood as well so she will be fine.

notacooldad · 09/07/2025 15:24

If you do send her, its not like she's going for the whole of the holiday is it. Just do a day here and there and you are both getting the best of both worlds, she's staying connected with friends and the rest of the time she's with you.

BiddyPopthe2nd · 09/07/2025 15:26

We had to for childcare purposes. There were some years I was able to take more time off so it wasn’t as necessary. But some of the clubs are good to try out things not normally available like cookery or dance camp etc. Or for more intense training in something they already do.

so it may be worth trying something interesting and different for the sake of the skills DC could learn.

But I wouldn’t bother just for the sake of doing it - it sounds like a nice mix of friend activities and family activities without them.

and as DC gets older, you can revisit the “should I, shouldn’t I?” question again as it may change as they grow up.

PolyVagalNerve · 09/07/2025 15:26

I have an only,
and would make huge effort to take her here there and everywhere to make sure she was not an only and lonely !
an older teen now. She says she would have loved more time to just veg !
so I think there is something about a balance !
and the right kind of clubs !
something fun rather than for the sake of it as you are available anyways

Hodgemollar · 09/07/2025 15:26

Feeling pressured by who? Other families making decisions has no baring on you. Being at home for an older kid isn’t necessarily better nor is being in a holiday club less than.

Purpleturtle45 · 09/07/2025 15:27

I'm a teacher with 3 kids and mine have gone to a few holiday clubs over the years but only things they have asked to go on or are keen on, some of them an extension of the clubs they already go to.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with not sending your child to holiday clubs. If you find she is bored or you need a break you can always re-evaluate as the summer goes on.

Londonrach1 · 09/07/2025 15:28

I work but dd comes with me....I offered to book her into different activities and she said it's the holiday. Can't argue that. Unless you need to why book them in.

FatherFrosty · 09/07/2025 15:30

No doesn’t need it. If it’s something she wants to do that’s different. I don’t think they need it socially either, you’ve got a few play dates etc booked in. Don’t worry your doing a great job, enjoy this time whilst she’s little and your not just a taxi