Mum to a 2.5 year old…are these feelings normal?

[Unamum]

I adore DS and we have a lot of fun. I get decent breaks from parenting too. But… I find the constant questions and needs so frustrating. I get annoyed at myself for feeling like this as I wish I had more patience. In my head I’m just thinking ‘put the effing sock on’ or ‘Christ alive leave me alone.’

I really struggle with the constant verbal demands and resistance to leaving the house and so on. When he was a baby obviously the needs were even greater but I was fine with that as I was in charge of the situation and just powered through. I could have a tea in peace when he slept and I didn’t have to be ‘on form’ playing or chatting. But with a toddler I find the need to be communicating, chasing, negotiating etc absolutely horrible. I just don’t enjoy it and feel worried that people say you will look back and wish you could go back to this time! Is this as good as it gets?!

Are these feelings normal?! Am I doing something wrong?

It's so normal and every stage has it's challenges but also it's joy. You're ok to dislike this phase but doesn't mean it'll be all phases :)
I hated the whining to so adopted early on "mumma does hearing wining" until he'd use a normal tone and I then only respond.
Music in the car.
Calm down step.
Loop earplugs to take some of the sensory overload down a notch but still hear?
Also sometimes giving a choice. So they feel a bit more in control.
I used to do something called imagination stories. They pick 3 things and you make up a story with those 3 things take quick or take ages, but they go in to listening rather than talking mode.

If any of these help please take them!

I’m the same as a previous poster and would’ve happily jumped from newborn to age 5 overnight and I remember people saying to me that you will look back and miss them being small.
I never have ! Mine are 11 and 14 now and they’re ace, obviously loads of new challenges with teens but I’ve found the last six or seven years of parenting so much easier.

Im not at the stage of questions yet and most of the time I find my little boy (18 months) so cute … but I also can realllllly struggle not to lose my patience and on days we are at home I lose track of how many times I internally say “FFS!” - the attention span is so short and he’s only happy when I’m crawling around and running from room to room chasing him and playing hide and seek - which is so sweet but not for 12 hours a day! I share your worries that this is “as good as it gets” and feel awful for think that.

Mine were fairly easygoing but I’m really not keen on the 1-3 stage with the constant need for entertainment and little in the way of understanding and communication skills. It got massively better from 3 when you could have a conversation and activities became a bit more interesting. I have to say though, I would not negotiate - what you say goes. I also love questions; curiosity should be nurtured!

I found this the hardest phase (so far). DD was mostly a an easy toddler. DS…wowsers! Had to hold on for the ride and did come out the other end. He’s just about to turn 10. He’s got a stubborn streak but I think he’ll go far. He’s got a very strong sense of right and wrong now and his lack of sense of danger has than god gone. You’ll get through this. You aren’t alone, it is an incredibly testing time. This gif is the same as someone sent me once when I was saying similar to you ❤️

This really isn’t the time for that. Why try to make her feel worse than she already does? Your problems don’t make the OP’s problems any less.

I would take the verbal commands over the pulling and dragging at me because my three year old wants something and he can't say it. So frustrating.

My sons are adults now and what amazing people they are but (and I’m likely to be hung, drawn and quartered for this) I don’t enjoy the company of small children blathering on. I found it boring. I didn’t overindulge being questioned on a loop. They have to learn to amuse themselves. They’ve turned out fine

My seven year old gives constant demands. I have been tempted to say " I am not your slave!".

Not the point though is it 🙄

One of my dcs was hard work at tthis age. It will pass, op you're feelings are completely normal. There is a reason toddlers get a bad wrap, it is bloody hard work! My youngest is now finally out of this stage and starting to emotionally regulate. Things are becoming easier gradually, but oldest is only little still but becoming moody, and I'm missing him at the age of the youngest when he was ao sweet ans cuddly; you can't win!

I am enjoying to be not quite as hands on, and some extra time to self, as we haven't had any support. There are different challenges at different ages, and all children are different. Just be kind to yourself op, this will pass.

One of mine was this way, I used to be exhausted, everything was pulling my hand and crying/winging. It all made sense when the ND diagnosis came. I have to say though my NT child was more difficult in some ways that my ND child wasn't, more stubborn, more tantrums at 2 etc.

I agree, I had a non verbal child my DD and then my son who was a whirlwind.

It is relentless. Different phases suit different people, I found I was just rubbish with playing with that age group, I quite liked going to Costa for a babyciino but all the pretend tea parties, tantrums, questions and driving little plastic cars around on repeat bored me to death. Mine are 7 and 9 now and we can have great chats plus they very often just bugger off and do their own thing so I can sit in the quiet with a cuppa. Don't get me wrong, there's annoying parts of this phase too but it's a lot easier day to day IMHO. You'll get through it, when they go to school their worlds open up a bit and the chats get more interesting, they get more independent etc.
Stick with it! It's not you, it's not your child, it's a phase!

You can often bat the question back to him. For instance, if he has asked you 10 times what you are doing, and you have given him the same answer 10 times, then next time say “what do YOU think I might be doing?” It will often give the conversation a different turn, which might be fun, or silly, but it will be a change of pace.

Ok, so mine has developmental delay and I haven’t got to this stage yet, but my plan was to ask what they think the answer to a question is. Does this actually work?