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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Anyone else lost a bit of ambition now they’ve been taxed to the brink?

1000 replies

Peasontoastt · 04/07/2025 19:56

I used to be extremely ambitious and was really eager to reach some sort of financial security. As a consequence, I’m in what’s considered a highly paid career, I work hard and it took me many years to train.

Just as I paid off my student loan (which took many years), I then had a baby and returned to work to be stuck with the childcare dilemma. I struggled through that phase and have come out the other side but being taxed so much, no child benefit, still paying for nursery even though dd has ‘free’ hours now. It’s likely that savings are going to be bashed next, so what’s the point in even putting anything aside when there’s likely going to be a 4K cap on ISAs.

I used to feel so ambitious and of course I know money isn’t everything, not by a long shot. But having worked my way up the ladder and with huge responsibilities only to feel penalised financially for doing so…what is the point? Yes I have more financial security than someone claiming benefits but equally, I am not being flippant when I say a few years of resting and being at home and being frugal is starting to seem so much more attractive. Has anyone else started feeling this way? I feel taken the piss out of by every financial angle!

OP posts:
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ThatFlyIsMySpiritAnimal · 04/07/2025 20:40

I’m quite happy to contribute to the society I live in. I would pay more tax if it meant better services too.

guerdyguatd · 04/07/2025 20:40

I live in Ireland and pay 51% on marginal income, and that kicks in way lower than the UK. Add to that my pension contribution and I take home 40c/€.

Ireland has very good education though and isn't uni free? Plus child benefit used to be generous and universal.

Bunny44 · 04/07/2025 20:40

Yes 100% and I have friends in the same boat. Not from a particularly well off background so had no handouts and I'm now a single parent with no CM but I've done fairly well in my career and always saved and been cautious with spending to ensure a safety net.

One friend in particular we're both ambitious and now in our late 30s I have a well paid salaried job and she's got her own business. Then we both had additional side hustles. We used to brain storm business ideas but now we just talk about how much tax we're paying and how there's no point in earning more - the extra isn't worth the extra time or effort for the extra take home. With the childcare cliff edge, I'm actually worse off if I do more. Best I can do is contribute more to my pension, but that's not what I would do ideally right now considering that I'm a single parent and with the cost of everything.

Yes I feel stifled and worried what's coming next.

guerdyguatd · 04/07/2025 20:40

I think it should go up a modest amount, with steeper rises for the higher rates.

Jesus Christ how high should it be?!

Lifeofthepartay · 04/07/2025 20:40

Summerhillsquare · 04/07/2025 20:23

Go on then, sack it off and 'go on benefits ', see how that works for you.

See how that works for the ones that always have been on benefits when they are no tax payers to pay for it....🤣

SunnyFTM567 · 04/07/2025 20:41

LordEmsworth · 04/07/2025 20:36

Do you genuinely think that spending a day a week with your family makes you "less ambitious" though?🙄 I'd say you have achieved the ability of being able to make that choice. Why is that a negative?

I'm ambitious but money isn't how I measure that. It's nice but I earn enough to consider myself lucky to be a net contributor and able to support my wider family. No one likes paying tax, but it's a bloody sight better than the alternative surely?

In my career, dropping down to 4 days a week is the "mummy track". Good salary, zero promotion prospects. Working less and choosing to not go down the road that gets you promoted is the definition of being less ambitious. It might seem nice now but in 10 years her male counterparts will be making a lot more than her. And that's where this bites.

vodkaredbullgirl · 04/07/2025 20:41

waits to see if OP comes back

tramtracks · 04/07/2025 20:42

soupyspoon · 04/07/2025 20:02

We are a low tax economy

lol

REDB99 · 04/07/2025 20:42

CaptainFuture · 04/07/2025 20:35

Nooones asking for that high level stuff.
People are saying it's shit I can't afford a newer car or to go on holiday, I only just break even in life, I work loads and get bumped for tax, yet Betty and her family down the road who are all on benefits have a lovely new car and are on their 2nd Benidorm holiday.

But the PP I quoted didn’t say this, they stated they had outgoings and paid tax and hadn’t been on holiday for ten years. They didn’t say anything about people who claim benefits so don’t bring that into it.

I happily pay tax. I’ve never claimed benefits, don’t get child benefit as I earn too much. But I don’t blame paying tax on not being able to afford things like that PP suggested.

Lifeofthepartay · 04/07/2025 20:43

Yes. I would never take a managerial role, that would take me to the threshold to pay 45% tax, anything extra would be negligible after tax, and NI when you consider having a lot more responsibility and having to work extra hours you'd be making not much more than min wage 🤦‍♀️

columnatedruinsdomino · 04/07/2025 20:44

It was only about 40 years ago when the basic rate income tax was 33% and the top rate c.85% iirc. Ypu're living the dream now

IPreferShoesToIssues · 04/07/2025 20:45

Is there anything you can do to mitigate higher taxes? For example, I put as much as my co. pension will let me and I pay less tax as a result.

I’m not paying any more tax if I can avoid it.

I’ve also taken my DC out of private school after the vitriol targeted at parents. That’s £6K+ the government are refunding me yearly. Feels good to get something back for a change rather than being rinsed.

LordEmsworth · 04/07/2025 20:45

SunnyFTM567 · 04/07/2025 20:41

In my career, dropping down to 4 days a week is the "mummy track". Good salary, zero promotion prospects. Working less and choosing to not go down the road that gets you promoted is the definition of being less ambitious. It might seem nice now but in 10 years her male counterparts will be making a lot more than her. And that's where this bites.

But that's her choice? As far as I know, men get taxed the same as women - or did I miss something? I really don't think "being taxed to the brink" is a feminist issue...

Toastandbutterand · 04/07/2025 20:46

Basic universal credit is £400 a month.

We are a low tax economy.

We have some of the lowest benefits in Western Europe.

NevergonnagiveHughup · 04/07/2025 20:48

guerdyguatd · 04/07/2025 20:40

I live in Ireland and pay 51% on marginal income, and that kicks in way lower than the UK. Add to that my pension contribution and I take home 40c/€.

Ireland has very good education though and isn't uni free? Plus child benefit used to be generous and universal.

That’s the point though- my tax (and others) pays for these things. If you want that type of benefit in society it has to be funded from somewhere that’s not the magic money tree.

but let’s be clear - there is a lot of waste so it’s not utopia, but it is a model I support at immense personal cost!

SunnyFTM567 · 04/07/2025 20:49

LordEmsworth · 04/07/2025 20:45

But that's her choice? As far as I know, men get taxed the same as women - or did I miss something? I really don't think "being taxed to the brink" is a feminist issue...

The question was do higher taxes make you less ambitious? I said choosing to work 4 days a week because the tax means that 5th day doesn't earn you much, is exactly that. Being less ambitious. Choosing spending time with your family over paid work. A lovely thing to do. But career wise, absolutely the definition of lacking ambition.

guerdyguatd · 04/07/2025 20:49

@NevergonnagiveHughup but we don't have those benefits in the UK. That's the point! People are paying more and more tax particularly higher earners and not getting much back.

WideawakeinSanDiego · 04/07/2025 20:52

HeddaGarbled · 04/07/2025 20:05

My god, the capacity for the privileged to feel hard done by. Taxed to the brink, my arse.

UK is highly taxed and it has got worse. Which tax band are you in?

SleeplessInWherever · 04/07/2025 20:52

I pay higher rate tax, and couldn’t be less bothered, because earning more means contributing more. Why wouldn’t it?

I am perfectly happy paying my share towards the economy, and towards supporting others.

In all honesty the government could put mine up, for things like disability and elderly benefit, and that would be fine.

I think I just acknowledge that paying a high rate of tax means that my income is higher than others, and that’s still an overall positive. I’m not losing out by having more.

guerdyguatd · 04/07/2025 20:52

It was only about 40 years ago when the basic rate income tax was 33% and the top rate c.85% iirc. Ypu're living the dream now

@columnatedruinsdomino on what incomes though & what % we're paying that?

"In 1991–92 just 3.5% of UK adults paid the 40% higher rate of income tax. By 2022–23 11% were paying higher rates, with that figure set to reach 14% by 2027–28. Of that 14%, 3.1% of adults will face marginal tax rates of either 45% or 60%"

Farmhouse1234 · 04/07/2025 20:53

SunnyFTM567 · 04/07/2025 20:03

Go abroad. We moved offshore in 2022 partly because of Covid. Always intended to come back. Now I have a baby, our parents are begging us to come back. But I'm looking at the tax in the UK, the cost of childcare, the salaries, the healthcare....no way. I gave birth in private healthcare, my son has a paedetrician that knows him since birth, and I make more money than I ever could for the hours I work in particular. I am home at 5pm every day!

Look offshore. Plenty of places to go to.

Im sure someone else has asked - but where are you? Asking for a friend :) seriously though it sounds great.

CaptainFuture · 04/07/2025 20:53

ThatFlyIsMySpiritAnimal · 04/07/2025 20:40

I’m quite happy to contribute to the society I live in. I would pay more tax if it meant better services too.

What's stopping you paying more now, you can contact hrmc am sure and make additional payments.. you know 'The Greater Good' and all that..

guerdyguatd · 04/07/2025 20:54

I'm interested in how many of the posters who are happy paying high taxes are renting? I think if you are older and have a lower mortgage you will feel very different.

ridingfreely · 04/07/2025 20:55

@SunnyFTM567 any places you reccomend for a better balance?

Bringmeahigherlove · 04/07/2025 20:55

Do you use the NHS? “Free” nursery places? The education system in general?

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