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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Anyone else lost a bit of ambition now they’ve been taxed to the brink?

1000 replies

Peasontoastt · 04/07/2025 19:56

I used to be extremely ambitious and was really eager to reach some sort of financial security. As a consequence, I’m in what’s considered a highly paid career, I work hard and it took me many years to train.

Just as I paid off my student loan (which took many years), I then had a baby and returned to work to be stuck with the childcare dilemma. I struggled through that phase and have come out the other side but being taxed so much, no child benefit, still paying for nursery even though dd has ‘free’ hours now. It’s likely that savings are going to be bashed next, so what’s the point in even putting anything aside when there’s likely going to be a 4K cap on ISAs.

I used to feel so ambitious and of course I know money isn’t everything, not by a long shot. But having worked my way up the ladder and with huge responsibilities only to feel penalised financially for doing so…what is the point? Yes I have more financial security than someone claiming benefits but equally, I am not being flippant when I say a few years of resting and being at home and being frugal is starting to seem so much more attractive. Has anyone else started feeling this way? I feel taken the piss out of by every financial angle!

OP posts:
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11
BetterWithPockets · 04/07/2025 22:39

Lioncub2020 · 04/07/2025 22:30

No privileged, to be admired. We used to put up statues for the captains of industry now we insult them. Every person receiving benefits literally needs someone with high economic productivity to exist otherwise they would starve. Maybe they should allocate names so that people know who their benefactor is, then they could send a thank you Christmas card.

Good idea. I’d happily send a thank you Christmas card to all those out there working their arses off in minimum wage jobs.
Entitled arses — not so much…

JuliaSG · 04/07/2025 22:39

WhisperGold · 04/07/2025 19:59

Taxed to the brink? How?

Is this a joke question. Anyone earning over 50,000 sees so little of their take home pay, especially if they are paying student loan and substantial pension contributions alongside.

MikeRafone · 04/07/2025 22:40

JustPinkFinch · 04/07/2025 22:31

But that's theory not real world.

I am a service provider in one business (not selling goods), and I had to absorb the VAT when it came time to register. So £100 became £83. I could not increase my price and remain competitive, so I just started paying it from my pocket. Many other small businesses are just like mine.

Furthermore, I have very few vatable expenses to reclaim and I do not qualify for the flat rate VAT scheme. Again, many other small businesses are just like mine.

VAT is a regressive tax and it stiffles the growth of many small businesses.

no longer being in the EU - UK is not bound to keep VAT

EasternStandard · 04/07/2025 22:40

bananafake · 04/07/2025 22:38

Oh my god do you not see that the reason we have crumbling public services is for years we haven't paid enough tax. Do you believe the guff about too much waste in the system? Well they're cut out so much 'waste' that people wait months for treatment, police don't bother investigating many crimes and teachers are buying their own equipment. Frigging marvelous!

Who do you mean hasn’t paid enough tax? Which tax bracket do you want to pay more?

CaptainFuture · 04/07/2025 22:40

bananafake · 04/07/2025 22:38

Oh my god do you not see that the reason we have crumbling public services is for years we haven't paid enough tax. Do you believe the guff about too much waste in the system? Well they're cut out so much 'waste' that people wait months for treatment, police don't bother investigating many crimes and teachers are buying their own equipment. Frigging marvelous!

'We' haven't paid enough tax..... or the net takers, 5th generation never contributers has increased?..

WearyAuldWumman · 04/07/2025 22:42

UncharteredWaters · 04/07/2025 22:36

If 30 hours childcare comes to Scotland so will every woman I know.

as a group of 6 new mums earning over 100k we’d all cut down to 99k to
get the childcare - currently would be worth 12k to us, that’s a 30k increase in pay I’d need to make 12k take home and I’d be away from my baby.
no brianer
but the government loses tax and pays childcare. What a stupid policy.

They'd need to check whether the tax bands here (in Scotland) made it worth their while.

I've just had a look: the "advanced rate" here of 45% starts at £75,001.

www.mytaxaccountant.co.uk/post/tax-rates-in-scotland-vs-rest-of-uk

JuliaSG · 04/07/2025 22:43

northernballer · 04/07/2025 21:14

We are both higher rate tax payers, don't qualify for child benefit, can't get an NHS dentist so have to pay, can never get a drs appt when we need one, the kids haven't had qualified science teachers in their state schools and basicslly taught themselves, roads are shit, public transport is shit, bins never get collected and the list goes on. It does start to piss you off.

Absolutely. I have paid tax since I started working in my teens. I now pay between NI and tax, over 1600 pounds a month. Where does it go? I can’t access basic services and my children’s school is run on donations as money is so hard to come by!

Oldcrockpot · 04/07/2025 22:44

@UncharteredWaters exactly. When I was doing FT and pushing on I also had to pay a nanny as my line of work means being always on. Basically giving all what salary I had left for savings etc away. Now my role is rescoped for PT and I am (usually) able to collect my children and see them in the evening. While getting my tax free allowance back and 30 hours and TFCC. To be fair if I was finding the juggle of career and family easy I would continue pushing up the ladder, but I was suffering from burnout trying to do everything and it seemed ludicrous to carry on working more and more to give more and more away in tax and childcare.

MikeRafone · 04/07/2025 22:45

JuliaSG · 04/07/2025 22:39

Is this a joke question. Anyone earning over 50,000 sees so little of their take home pay, especially if they are paying student loan and substantial pension contributions alongside.

If you earn £50,000 then your net income is £39,521
If you earn £35,000 then your net income is £28,721
If you earn £100,000 then y0ur net income is £68,561

student loan isn't a tax and neither is your pension - the later actually saves you tax

ilovesooty · 04/07/2025 22:45

echt · 04/07/2025 22:35

I'm sure you know someone on benefits so why don't you do it?

Go on, and get back to us.

Except you won't, just a malignant, beady-eyed post.

Agreed. Of all the unpleasant, sneering posts on this thread her comments about people claiming benefits are some of the worst.

Studyunder · 04/07/2025 22:45

I wish I could earn more and would be delighted to earn enough to be paying more tax!
My main beef is how shit this country is investing in infrastructure long-term. I’d be delighted to pay Scandinavia level of tax if the government had the common sense to spend it properly 🤷🏼‍♀️

kittensinthekitchen · 04/07/2025 22:46

UncharteredWaters · 04/07/2025 22:32

I feel like rather than high paid career women paying tax I should join the majority in ‘self employed’ claiming benefits and stashing the rest under the bed in cash.

Go for it! See how much "the rest" there is to stash Wink

Lioncub2020 · 04/07/2025 22:46

echt · 04/07/2025 22:35

I'm sure you know someone on benefits so why don't you do it?

Go on, and get back to us.

Except you won't, just a malignant, beady-eyed post.

You want me to go and ask someone on benefits to send me a thank you card? Are you mad? Plus it should come from them really but won't because as we can see most the people who get benefits are generally pretty ungrateful.

KateMiskin · 04/07/2025 22:49

Nobody on minimum wage needs to send me a thank you card for being a high tax payer. I need them. But equally, they need me too.

kittensinthekitchen · 04/07/2025 22:49

Lioncub2020 · 04/07/2025 22:46

You want me to go and ask someone on benefits to send me a thank you card? Are you mad? Plus it should come from them really but won't because as we can see most the people who get benefits are generally pretty ungrateful.

What a piece of work you are.

echt · 04/07/2025 22:50

Lioncub2020 · 04/07/2025 22:46

You want me to go and ask someone on benefits to send me a thank you card? Are you mad? Plus it should come from them really but won't because as we can see most the people who get benefits are generally pretty ungrateful.

Hole. Keep digging.

ilovesooty · 04/07/2025 22:50

TwoFeralKids · 04/07/2025 22:36

I don't see much difference between people not working more in case it affects their benefits and high earners who are stuffing money in pensions to get it under £100k and get the funded hours. Playing the system to get some benefits. One is not morally better than the other IMO.

Neither do I.

dewfirst · 04/07/2025 22:51

Spartahori · 04/07/2025 21:12

I earn between £100-£125k and live in Scotland so every extra £ I earn I only see about 31p of. I don’t quite work full time and could take more hours at work to be full time but I really don’t see what the point is.

Yes - 68% tax rate on the extra that is earned. My biggest gripe is where my taxes go ; mostly to outsourced ‘public’ services which make billions in profits for privately owned companies .
In my opinion this is the reason for our inadequate services , too much privatisation, deregulation and zero controls , hey , that’s the markets right ?? And so much is hidden behind symbols that are designed to confuse - NHS service providers… etc - why was so much ever allowed to be outsourced when it would obviously cost us all more. My local District nurses have been ‘provided’ by Virgin Health for years but that’s not widely known . Like government subsidised buy to let mortgages used by people to profit from the housing shortage - shit holes rented vastly over costs to tenants claiming their rents via housing benefits - etc etc
Asylum seekers living in squalor but that squalor is charged at top rate to the government and has made the landlord a billionaire….in less than 5 years .
I object to the lack of oversight and forward planning. I pay my way, wish everyone did the same and abhor those that actively seek to minimise their share .

Agrumpyknitter · 04/07/2025 22:51

No. My husband pays 45 percent tax and I pay 40 percent we have a lovely life. Lots of travel, business class flights to long haul destinations. Yes we pay a lot of tax but that’s the result of living in a society where we look after the weakest amongst us (which I think is a good thing)
At one point as a teenager my divorced mother had to rely on benefits for a few years until she could get a better job to support us without them. I still had to wear second hand clothes and money was tight but she could pay her mortgage, bills and provide the essential. that safety net was a lifeline.
We’re lucky and live in a lovely part of the country. I can get a GP appointment and have always managed to get one for my children same day if needed and had good experiences with the NHS. We have the grammar school system here, so the education is excellent.

MikeRafone · 04/07/2025 22:52

If someone in 1986 as a teacher is earning £8000 and a hour is £20k - which they were in my area and now that same house is selling for £400k then a teachers wage should surely be how much?Its wages that are the sticking point - they aren't enough

but all the time people complain about the amount of tax or the lack of benefits or the price of houses

but its the wages that haven't kept pace and who pays the wages?

BetterWithPockets · 04/07/2025 22:52

Goodtick · 04/07/2025 22:34

@BetterWithPockets because a couple on under 50k are likely to actually have more take home pay than me from benefits and childcare hours. Yes, if you’re a couple both earning loads you probably do feel privileged. However, it depends on circumstances and how far above 100k you actually earn to make it worth it ( for the hours worked, lack of balance) You can’t just say everyone is privileged.

Actually, as someone who earns less than a quarter of your salary (and with a DH who brings in about the same as me) I can say that. And I can think it.

You don’t have to agree with me; that’s fine.

MaturingCheeseball · 04/07/2025 22:52

A mad idea was the “Entitled to” website. It was all part of the all rights and no responsibilities wave which seemed to crash over the population.

MikeRafone · 04/07/2025 22:52

that should read can buy a house for £20k - sorry

Dappy777 · 04/07/2025 22:52

There are loads of YouTube videos in which Brits moan about the lack of ambition in the U.K., and how things are different in Asia or Australia or whatever. But the U.K. is a small, overcrowded island. There just isn’t enough space. Also, the demand for housing is very high. Developers take advantage of this and build disgusting little rabbit hutches, jam them on top of one another, and then charge a ridiculous amount. And even if you do save up and buy a house on one of these awful new estates, there has to be social housing as well. So you’ll probably end up living twenty yards away from a noisy ‘problem family’. It’s no wonder Brits aren’t as ambitious as Australians or Americans. Life for hardworking people on middle incomes just isn’t that great.

Lioncub2020 · 04/07/2025 22:53

echt · 04/07/2025 22:50

Hole. Keep digging.

Quite the opposite of a hole. I just get so pissed on these threads when all net takers are like, give us more! give us more! The sooner Reform get in and move to a more American style approach the better - its only a matter of time now with this labour shit show. Make Britain Great Again!

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