To not understand end of year gifts for teachers?

[Threecactusplants]

That time is upon us.
My DS’s class WhatsApp ‘admin’ has asked if people want to contribute towards a voucher for the teacher - suggested donation £10 each.
AIBU but the teachers are being paid for this job, they’re not doing it voluntarily.
Okay I understand if the child is leaving/in last year or the teacher is leaving.

To be honest, I haven’t been hugely impressed this year, DS’s teacher has been quite slack and we have had very little communication. He’s been happy going to school which is the main thing but I probably would have got a small card or asked him to make one. It’s only a small class of 21 so if I don’t contribute it’ll be obvious.

We declare any largeish gifts (beyond a bunch of flowers) to SLT and then move on. Not considered bribery at all. Think the safeguarding team have their hands full with real issues than perceived 'bribery'. Comprehensive school.

Thank you for the option but DC has already planned their thank you gesture!

That's all you need to say OP. Take a breath and step away from this end of year bull shit.

Many posters isn't it just you ? If your college is so corrupt that they had to say no gifts then there is a bigger problem going on, i am assuming these parents are desperate for them to get into "good universities " so they can brag about RG universities online and to their wider circle. Buying a primary school teacher and support staff an end of year voucher amongst 20 odd pupils is different from near adults needing mummy and daddy to "buy them grades"

How does buying token gift for nurses smack of bribery? I don't get this.

An extra big collection was made for our Y2 teacher, as it was an infant school and the kids were moving on to juniors. I've no idea why it was deemed appropriate that she was given more because she was the last teacher they'd have in that school? Made no sense to me.

Best just to say that you're doing your own thing, then leave it if you don't feel the teacher has gone above and beyond. (I did give little gifts to my son's TA each year as she was his 1:1 and they frankly do go above and beyond every day. Not to say the teacher wasn't good, they all were - but a TA does so much more for one child and for less pay.) I also bought boxes of biscuits for all the staff, they all contribute to the smooth running of the school so why not

If you don´t agree simply state you won´t contribute. The mum who organised ours, just asked who would like to contribute. Those who were interested replied to her, including us. When we saw what budget we had, she got gift, gift was given. I think it was 5€ we gave. Zero obligation. I don´t really get the overthinking. I didn´t contribute one of the years, didn´t have any social repercussions.

No it hasn't been just me saying it.

Did you read the thread?

Totally agree OP. They get paid. No-one gives me extra "gifts" for doing my job. Seems unfair that some professions (like postmen and teachers) get these additional perks and others don't.

I think a gift is only appropriate to thank someone for going above and beyond. DSs teachers have largely been a disappointment.

I did yes, I mean maybe another but mainly you,

@NannyOgg1341 There seems to have been an explosion of playground politics for primary schools, something that started as a nice gesture seems to have become a status game.

^This, absolutely. The competitive gifting, the WhatsApp groups, the drop-off fashion catwalk, I could go on ... I wish these parents would just grow up, tbh.

Having worked in the public sector for years, I can say there's nothing more toe-curling than getting gifts from the public. Please don't. Just send a card.

I don’t think any amount should be suggested - nobody should be made to feel mean or tight for giving less. But IMO the voucher is a better idea than a present that’s TBH unlikely to be anything the teacher her/himself would choose.

You see parents of school children as "the public " do you not think there should be some sort of 2 way relationship between schools and parents ?

Our school asked people to stop giving gifts a few years ago. I think the point at which one class turned up with a trolley full to bursting of presents to give to the teacher might have been the point at which everyone said 'enough'. We give a card that my child signs.

I've contributed to a end of year collection for my son's reception teacher and teaching assistants. However there was no expectations or suggested amount, everyone should give what they like, no pressure to join in.

I don't get how it's bribery when it's a whole class collection, the teacher doesn't know if any parents have contributed more than others, there is no implication of wanting anything in return for the gift?

If you want to express your thanks to a teacher, buy a nice Thank You card and get your child to write it. There are too many bonuses nowadays to people who have just stuck a stamp on an envelope - bosses, etc. They are paid to do their job which they should do properly and it should be ensured that there is enough money to go around for the needs of the general staff i.e. books, computers that work, buildings that don't leak etc. It has all become an expectation rather than exception.

If ai pay you stupid amounts of money or buy you expensive gifts, you will help my daughter get one over on all of the other students:

Personalised tuition,
Change of grade from fail to ace
Converted positions in school such as prefects
Excellent references for private school admissions

I was a teacher. This thread has brought back memories. From my first year, salary £640 pa, skrimping and living off macaroni cheese. I was only able to give presents to the distal family because I could regift those Christmas chocolates. Thank you for that. And there was the 12 Days of Christmas mug which lasted for years, referring to my Chrstmas maths worksheets, or the stars mug when I had the telescope and evening sessions. And when I finished my career, there was a flood of joint gifts, the school one, but the class as well, a voucher for an exhibition at the O2, a small sculpture of a teacher and an old style blackboard etc. Overwhelming and unbelievable. I didn't know how much I was appreciated. (Though I remember a Jennings story in which he collected for a leaving gift for Mr Wilkins, and some only gave because they were glad he was going. Can't remember the exact quote, though, which is like not remembering a PG Wodehouse quote, because Buckeridge had a gift with words.)
Anyway, this thread has filled me with appreciation again.
And a memory of, as a prefect at secondary school, planning a collection for one leaving teacher, and deciding to give her a parrot. Did we?

But if it’s divided by 30 kids, it’s not excessive, is it?

So just because you don't get a gift, nobody should? That's a bit depressing. Every job has it's advantages and disadvantages and speaking as a teacher there are very little perks (these days).

Also there aren't many professions where you spend so much of your own money to do your job. Obviously if you don't want to contribute there shouldn't be any pressure but that's not to say nobody should.

That must be very sticky when they open up the envelopes.

What are you on about ? Are you not reading any responses giving an end of year gift card has zero effect on grades or one upmanship!

I see you are 1 of the "many" posters talking about corruption!

Yes and no. Gifting, no. Volunteering, helping out, fundraising, yes, if you have the time, although we understand that not everyone does or wants to.

Parents and service users etc. are members of the public. That is their legal status, and that is how we define ourselves to them.

We are not your friends. Sorry. There are boundaries that you might not have considered if you've never worked in the public sector.

If you want to show collegiality, then volunteer or support in another way. If you can't do this, then send a card - or just take the time to say "thank you".

And here I was imagining a jar of honey with a card 🤣. You're right ofcourse. So definitely not sticky then😄

I remember giving Christmas and end of year gifts to my primary school teachers 40 years ago, it existed then.

I've given money, you're going to do what I request and you're going to be liable for consequences, not me because YOU accepted the gift. I'm not just a parent now, I'm your customer. You have to satisfy your customer otherwise I tell very important people that you
accepted a bribe.