Glitter bombs from ex mother in law

[Heregoes234]

Hi there, was in two minds about posting this as seems utterly ridiculous but given the context of my situation I don’t know if I’m over thinking it.
Last week my ex partner was arrested by the police for harassing me and coercive control, he’s on bail and likelihood will be going to court soon, it was extreme but don’t want to go into that particularly as long story, but thought worth mentioning.

He left in 2023 for a women he had been cheating on me with for a few years. I then got in a relationship in late 2024 and that’s when he started to harass me which resulted in police being involved. He tried controlling my relationship and just didn’t like that I had moved on which was bizarre and gradually got worse to quite scary. His mum hasn’t been great and often makes things worse. I use Ai to write my emails to make sure there is no tone that could be misinterpreted out of being worried something will escalate.

Its our eldest birthday today and late last night around half ten 11 at night I heard the door. There are bail conditions that he can’t come to the house so assuming it was his mum. I heard a noise and saw two letters on the doormat for my daughter. I didn’t think much of it until she opened them this morning and glitter went everywhere including into my youngest eyes.

I am just a bit shocked as given the circumstances seems ill thought out but was it just for fun for our daughter? Or done to be petty?
It looks like she bought two cards as same make and got my ex to fill in one and her another but then she signed both the envelopes. I know I should get on with my day at this point and I think I would of brushed it off but with it getting in my daughters eye where I had to rinse it out for several minutes I’m just exasperated by it all.

Thanks for reading if you got this far.

That's a malicious harassment technique designed to cause a hard to clean up mess.

Did your youngest need medical care to wash it out of her eyes?

If so, get the records. Start the order against the ex partner's mom too.

Yeah I by no means think they thought that would happen it was just children enjoying presents being opened a bit of a rush before the school run and my youngest was just there eager to see what she was opening. I understand that was a mistake but think that was what set me off as it seemed wrong to have hand delivered them late at night given what’s happening at the moment and the bail
conditions.

It just spikes my nervous system each time.

Is the contact with the children court ordered?

Do you think she hoped you would open them first with recognising her handwriting?

I used to open poll tax cheques and there was lots of glitter in one and flour in another. It was 100% deliberate to make a mess. It wasn’t suppose to get into their eyes though. Hopefully your children will tell them that independently. I would ignore them but I would write it down and take a photo.

Check you’ve done a good vacuum around electrical equipment, plugs etc- backs of computers, and so on. Glitter getting into this can cause a short circuit and is a potential fire risk.

No one sends a glitter filled card as a nice thing. It’s a well known nasty thing to do. If you wanted to do it as a nice surprise you would use an appropriate themed confetti which is easy to clean up and not so fucking annoying/dangerous.

She’s also assisting your ex to fuck with you. Delivered late at night to make you worry if they are hanging around outside, filling them with glitter, facilitating him breaching his bail conditions. Report it. They won’t stop until they are made to. I’d also push to have her restricted too.

You should report this. If he gets arrested, it’s on him and his mother.

How do you know your ex packed one - presumably he is not allowed to send things to your house?

Well you can see where her son got it from. What a pair of nutjobs. Definitely report it; it does sound like indirect communication from him and while glitter bombs aren't illegal per se, in context it might count as malicious communication or harassment (IANAL).

I’m not comfortable posting photos so around half ten 11 at night heard a noise and saw the letters the writing I recognise as hers and was identical on the envelopes of both cards. When they were opened glitter in both but each card inside was different, one from my ex her Dad and the other card from herself. Both the cards are also the same brand so I’m assuming she bought both as he was never great at cards or getting gifts and with her having signed them both probably packed them herself but I don’t know for sure who actually delivered them. If I do report it it could be seen as a breach and I am worried about that but again this is how it starts up they get confident again start small then build up and last time it was a few months of silence and this is literally a week after he was arrested.

I actually don’t know if he can or cannot post things to the house. The bail conditions are not to come here or have any communication that is direct or indirectly. I feel it’s a grey area the cards were for our daughter and I can’t prove who dropped them off.

I don’t suppose you have a video camera or ring doorbell do you? Glitter can cause serious eye injuries and even blindness in extremely unusual cases.

I think you need to report this, it is part of a low level campaign, but it is up to the Police/CPS what further action is taken. However, I think a Non-Mol order for your former MiL would be an appropriate response to this. As you say, this can only escalate.

Absolutely report it. He’s trying to contact you, and she’s supporting him to do it. The police need to be informed.

Exactly. I think you know it must be reported. You can’t just let them escalate again.

You've made it really clear you don't want him arrested so whats the point of the thread ? Let him continue harassing you. It will escalate, it may involve your children. Or report it because it shows a pattern of behaviour and he IS BREAKING HIS NON MOL ORDER.

I would cancel her contact tomorrow. Why reward that sort of behaviour? If she can't understand that this was a malicious act what else might slip by her?

My friends are telling me not to report it. I don’t have a non molestation order. The domestic abuse charity said three weeks before the conditions ends they will look into it if it’s needed as the bail conditions already state he cannot speak to me.

Sorry if me not wanting to jump on him being arrested is annoying for people but half the people are telling me it’s just a card in my life and I don’t know if it’s petty I can call the police back up and speak to the officer who arrested him and let them decide.

It’s my daughters birthday I’m trying to make
sure before I do anything.

That's really sly as they could just say it was a nice sparkly surprise in a child's birthday card but is absolutely done by people to be annoying!

Do you mean dad had written in one of the cards but the envelopes with dd's name on were both written by grandma??

OP you know you need to log this at the very minimum.

I'd also email school. Ask them to check in with your youngest that her eye isn't bothering her as you had to spend a while rinsing glitter out of it and are concerned in case you didn't get it all. It could really irritate her eye if there's some still hiding in there. 😔

In future anything from that side of the family open it yourself first without the kids, and outdoors. Maybe also worth a video recording you doing so just in case.

And get some CCTV or a ring doorbell please! 😔

I’m am exshauted and taking my daughters out with their friends after school for her birthday. I think I will call 101 for
advice and speak to the officer on my case but I don’t have proof of who delivered it and I think without context doesn’t sound that bad.

Glitter bombing is malicious. I am not sure why everyone is downplaying this. FFS.

Horrible. I am sorry that you are dealing with what sounds like a pair of nasty arseholes.

I do interpret that particular situation as being petty, knowing you will have to clear up a big mess and glitter gets everywhere! I don't think it was done to cause harm but to be a nuisance.

Sorry to hear what you're going through, it is very stressful (been there) and makes you overthink everything. If you think there is more malice/scare in it, report everything to the police so they can pull a record of all the events if it comes to it.

Your child has been injured. Please, at least speak to the officer in the case. You have a duty to protect the DC.

I think you should report it. I think from what you’ve said there’s often a pattern of escalation and if he gets away with the petty malicious stuff he’s likely to start doing more dangerous things.

I’d also be wary of sending the children to them at all, as he’s deliberately used your DC as a means to annoy you. Of course you will know their relationship with their father better but it is worrying.

Please take care and stay safe.