Who is unreasonable here?

[Llamachameleon]

A B and C were meant to be going to a gig together. It’s sold out but they said they’d look for cheap tickets nearer the time. It’s in three days.

B now can’t make it for health reasons (recent drop out) and A is a big fan and desperate to go. B and C both said they would set a limit for £100 to go with A but that they can’t justify more than that.

C is looking for tickets and the minimum is about £110. They feel a bit pressured into going but less keen given it’s so soon, the tickets aren’t below the price they agreed and also B has dropped out so it wouldn’t be a full girls night out anyway. However they feel response as they did say they would go with A in the first place if they could get reasonably priced tickets.

should C honour the commitment even if the tickets are more expensive? They’ve told A that they’ll need to make sure they get reasonable tickets before they fully commit

This comes across a bit like you don't value your friendship with A as much as your friendship with B. Would you be happy to spend £110 if B was still going? I can see why A might be upset if that was the case.

I don’t think this is about the £10. This is about you no longer wanting to go.

If you wanted to go, you’d pay the extra £10 so you’re now trying to get out of it on a technicality of a £100 limit.

You should go, A will be let down by two friends if you don’t go and, unless the extra £10 would cause you hardship, it’s a small price to pay to make sure your friend gets to go and see someone she’s excited about without having to end up going alone resenting her friends.

If A was a decent friend you felt comfortable with, you wouldn’t be so worried about this

Sorry first sip these weren’t to you. You have been fair.

they were to @LittleGreenDragons and @stichguru

Why aren’t you responding why you are looking and not A?

is A putting pressure on you? Does she know about the £110 tic?

£100 is a lot of money to see an artist you’re not fussed on!

The plan was basically to have a girls night out and agreed to set a £100 limit to go as A wanted two pals to go with. It’s not that A matters to me less than B but that the whole premise of the night has now changed and that tickets are expensive… more so than planned

Op?

Then tell her sorry it is above your budget and you can't go.

@Firstsipofcoffee I was looking for myself but will ask A to look too

Why would you do that??

she is the one who wants to go supposedly so let her look!!

just keep quiet about it

The premise hasn't changed at all. It's still a girls' night out just with two rather than three girls. If you don't want to go/don't want to spend so much that's fair enough but surely you can see why A might be disappointed?

You clearly don't want to go so just say you don't want to go anymore as the tickets are too expensive and you'd rather wait till the 3 of you can all go out to spend that money

I did this recently OP- went to see Beyonce with my friend who is a die-hard fan, I am far more casual. I couldn't justify hundreds of pounds so set a hard limit of £100- however when the tickets came out it was clear that the tiers were outside of round numbers which meant it would be about £110 (plus booking fees etc). It didn't occur to me to say no because of my 'limit', especially as my friend would have then not gone and been disappointed.

Basically, do you like this friend more than you don't like this artist?

But why on earth agree to go in the first place? Spending £100 or £110 on an artist you’re not into is really dopey.

Are you very young, and/ or the kind of people who can’t go anywhere, even the loo in a pub, alone?

were you expecting it to be around £50? And is it £110 all in or £110 plus booking fees so really £120?

i’d not want to attend but would feel awkward. So not sure what to do. Like you!

Well personally that would have been the line for me. I would never have agreed to pay £100 to see someone I don’t like. But you agreed to pay £100, so the extra £10 being the deal breaker feels a bit ridiculous.

If it’s not wildly over budget I would just go for it. It would mean a lot to your friend and you never know, you might just enjoy yourself x

If you don’t want to spend £110 for a gig you’re not that keen on going to, then no. But it is only £10 more, so I would. But you don’t have to if you’re not that excited about it. But do let your friend know asap so she can decide whether to go alone, miss it, or find someone else to go.

I think it’s a bit twatty to drop out over a tenner tbh, particularly if you were willing to drop £100 in something you don’t really want to see. It sounds like C doesn’t really like A and was only going because of B!

If A offered to pay the extra £10 for you, would you go?

God I hate this ABC nonsense especially when it’s obvious you’re C.

Id probably go. But if you do go, don’t go resentfully. Either go gladly or don’t go at all.

That was a risk, leaving it late to get tickets and assuming you'd get them within a very hard budget 😂

If you wanted to go, you'd go. You don't sound so keen.

So you have 2 choices:
A) go
B) don't go

Choice a) - all good.
Choice b) - you feel guilty and that you need to justify why to your friend(s).

If it were me/if I were C, I'd just go. And is maybe ask A to stump up for a round of drinks if you felt you'd stretched for them.

It sounds like C doesn’t really like A and was only going because of B!

That's how it came across to me, too.

I would buy the ticket and tell A the first drinks are on her