To think this is not OK?

[SchoolTripSENDrama]

Name changed as this is outing.

Mumsnet, I need your wisdom. DC is in reception, has ASD and an EHCP. They have 1:1 support.

a school trip was organised which would have been completely unsuitable for DC. Partly due to them being such a flight risk but also, they would not have got on the school bus in the first place. I asked what the option was if DC didn’t attend the trip and was told the school had enough staff to accommodate them, so if DC didn’t go on the trip they would get slapped with an unauthorised absence. No option for them to attend school that day.

AIBU to think this is not ok or do I clearly not have a clue how schools work?

So as not to drip feed, I kept DC at home and their 1:1 support went on the trip with the rest of the class.
I was told I could have gone on the trip too but I had too work, plus I knew it would have been so stressful for everyone, especially DC and I wasn’t prepared to put them through that.

is this legit?

It's another.... I'm perfect, everyone else is a'gin me the evil horrors..

Depending on the wording in Section F, would depend on how un/lawful they were with regard to provision of adult support if he did not attend the trip. However, he has the right to attend school irrespective of support - they cannot refuse to have him in for the day.

@TeenToTwenties I also work and also parented a highly anxious autistic kid with an EHCP.

Where a school, like this one, has considered a child's needs and made provision for them with additional staffing and is willing to allow a child to be part of a trip in the long run it's important to try to facilitate this. Parenting isn't about preventing a child from being distressed. It's about showing them that with support, they can and will manage things that at first seemed tricky. I wish I had understood that sooner.

They should have made provision for your child to attend school that day. It is fair that the trip happened, and it is fair that the 1-1 who knows the class and who will be partially funded by the school went on the trip. It is not right that your child was denied a day of education that he is entitled to. You have every right to complain, but you’re going to have a long journey with school, so I wouldn’t.

I think there is maybe a different discussion as to whether or not should have let her DS go on the trip, taking it account your opinions. However the school should have talked it through and tried to persuade her, calm her fears or whatever.

But given she didn't give permission, school should not have said the DS couldn't attend and then mark as unauthorised.

It's not always as simple as saying the 1:1 can stay at school with them. Being on their own with a child in a classroom all day isn't easy and also some schools won't allow it to safeguard both the child and the adult with them. They could go to a different class but some children with ASD would find this very overwhelming and distressing not to be in a familiar environment as well as confusing as to why they are there.

This might not be the case with the OPs DC but I know it would have been with some of the children at our school.

However, I think an authorised absence rather an unauthorised one would have been much more fair in this case due to the legitimate concerns the OP has.

Just from a factual point of view from education background, have dealt with a similar issue recently in my local authority…

YANBU to expect the school to be able to provide for your child if they didn’t want to attend the trip. Any child who chooses not to attend a trip would be expected to attend school - if not it would be unauthorised. I’ve never before heard that they prevented the child attending school and then said it would be unauthorised.

However, YABU to expect that your child’s 1:1 would stay in school unless they are specifically named in the EHCP which I’ve never seen - only settings named. it is usual practice for 1:1s to attend with the year group whether or not their child attends the trip or goes with a parent instead.

As long as the school could provide support for your child they will not be found in the wrong.

I’m not saying what is right and wrong in this situation- just a fact check

That’s an odd situation! At our school, there’s always some kids that don’t go on the school trips for whatever reasons, and they always just go into school as normal. That’s almost them saying the school trip is not optional, so what about kids who couldn’t afford it or had other reasons not to go! Never heard of that happening before. I’d have been tempted to send your child and let the 1:1 deal with the fallout, if they wouldn’t get onto the bus, what other option would they have but to stay at school anyway! But totally understand you wouldn’t want your child to have to escalate to that in the first place.

think some people are missing the point. You could send 10 volunteers and parents and he probably still wouldn’t get on the bus! The change or routine etc would have been traumatic for him and therefore is not safe for anyone. He has a right to education and a right to reasonable adjustments. He has his own staff member!!! Why was his safety net taken away. The EHCP is a legal document so you could question this OP. Why was his support removed? That’s exclusion. Most kids can stay behind in another class or do some 1:1 work/activities in the empty class if that is more stable and regular.

I've been out and about lately and witnessed lots of school trips and lots of SEN children on the trips. I've been really uncomfortable listening to the way adults speak to children on these trips.
Last week at Cotswolds wildlife park there were 2 boys wearing reigns they looked around year 4 or 5 and I'm feeling pretty shocked by that.

Not relevant to this thread obviously but I fully understand why OP didn't send DC.
A total lack of understanding from school as to your reasons.
And as someone said above there are residential trips where kids don't go and they go to school as often they take place in school hours.
OP Hasn't said she took the day off work. She said she kept her DC at home. Maybe a relative looked after DC. Maybe OP works nights or maybe starts at 2.30pm when oh gets back from his 6 -2 shift. I don't know! That's not relevant.
DC wouldn't have enjoyed the coach ride etc even if OP had gone on the trip.
Why don't argumentative posters come back when they have a clue.
School are being very heavy handed putting an unauthorised absence and OP is right to be annoyed.
Does DC's EHCP pay the 1 to 1s wage? Schools often use other kids 1 to 1s as extra cover seen it for years.
I hope you get to the bottom of it OP.

I would have thanked you and said enjoy your authorised day.
They should have made provision for them at school.

Good.

Op first I do agree your DC should be allowed to go to school for the day. But I do feel a bit differently about pp saying they can easily be looked after by their 1:1.
I'm not sure if they are with the same 1:1 all day or more than one adult normally share a day. The latter would be trickier. Even the same 1:1, this adult will need break and lunch etc to be covered. So if everyone else in the reception team went on the trip it's not as simple as "1:1 should just stay and it's all sorted"
But again I still think your DC should be able to attend school. And school should have made an arrangement for him, as long as they have been told DC not going on trip with long enough notice.

Honestly, thank you so much to everyone that has understood, tried to understand, not understood but still offered sound advice and opinions. I am really grateful.

I have arranged a meeting with the headmaster to talk it over and, hopefully, just get a bit of clarity for the future.

Can I ask why you were shocked about the kids wearing reigns?

That sounds like a good plan.
You want to be on the same side, with flexibility from both the school and you.

The child is entitled to a reasonable adjustment. If their primary care giver is saying the trip isn't suitable, there's no changes you can make for it to be suitable, then they should have permitted the child to stay at school. Even when we haul 200 kids across country on our annual pilgrimage to the Sea, not all kids go and there's adequate support staff to accommodate them. You can't tell me that with this child's 1:1, unless there wasn't a single other person in the school and the building was locked up, the child should have been allowed to access school.

I have never seen children older than toddlers being restrained in this way. I was shocked and uncomfortable by the way the children on reigns were spoken to.
None of my business if caregivers/parents agree/fully support/ want their children on reigns but I can still feel shocked at the sight of children on a school trip being controlled in that way.
I personally would prefer DC not to go.
But that's my feelings and opinion I'm not saying it's wrong if that's how they roll just saying not for me. Possibly has whiffs of restraint in asylums as I'm old enough to remember.

1:1 would be detailed, specified and quantified in F of an EHCP because it is SEP not a placement. Not in section I where the placement would be named.

Despite what LAs would have you believe, it isn’t rare for 1:1 to be detailed, specified and quantified in F.

If 1:1 is detailed, specified and quantified in F of an EHCP, the school should not be using the 1:1 for other things. If the child doesn’t attend a trip, 1:1 must still be provided. Whether that should be the usual person or not will depend on the wording in F.

Schools often use other kids 1 to 1s as extra cover seen it for years.

Schools who do this when 1:1 is detailed, specified and quantified in F of an EHCP leave themselves and the LA open to legal action.

For some DC, reins are what enable them to be out in the community. For some, the alternative is they either don’t go out or they remain in an SN buggy or wheelchair. Would you really prefer your DC to never go out or have to be in an SN buggy or wheelchair all the time?

How DC were spoken to is a separate matter.

Ime, allowing them go, encourages confidence, you cannot take him off whenever there is a school outing, unfortunately when a child is in mainstream they're forced along, sometimes it is worth it, other times not. The sna is trained to deal with the situation.

I understand why you feel that way

I’m a 1:1, at our school I would have stayed with your child at school and made it an extra special day for them.

💯

I went on many school trips because I knew ASNA wasn’t available/suitable and didn’t want my daughter to miss out. This invariably resulted in me being just another parent helper and got lumbered with other kids to look after, despite me always saying from the outset I wasn’t going to do that. Eventually I told them I would only look after her and a few of her friends, but I wasn’t taking responsibility for them. On one trip they got pissed off at me because part of the trip was an hour running about in a play park (which my daughter couldn’t take part in) so I took her and her three friends to the ice cream van and bought them something. The other kids were whinging that they never got one and the group leader told me I shouldn’t have done it. I countered with “you shouldn’t have organised a trip that excluded my child, but here we are”.

There is no world where I’m grateful for crumbs when it comes to my daughter being included.

@SchoolTripSENDramaTake this one all the way. School trips are not compulsory.