How long is too long to leave a baby crying?

[xbob]

I wfh and live in a semi and with it being summer and the windows open I can hear next doors baby crying a couple of times a day for up to half an hour.
It sounds as though they put them upstairs in the bedroom and leave them to cry until they eventually fall asleep.
I think this because I also hear it about 7/7:30 when I imaging it’s baby going to bed.
I don’t know if this is normal or not as I don’t have children but it’s literally anything up to half an hour, I’d imagine if a baby cries it needs something or a cuddle?

Would this concern you? As I said I don’t have children so if this is perfectly fine I’ll be happy to hear that.
Baby is about 8/9 months old.

Ditto. Mine cried all the time. Neighbours commented on it... It was horrendous! We didn't get meds that worked until DC was 3 months old 😭

CIO is child abuse (not going to sugar coat it for those selfish enough to prioritise their own needs over that of a baby). And it sounds like possibly that's what is going on here, however for some bizarre reason leaving your baby alone in a room crying is deemed fine by the authorities if parents say it is sleep training. So you don't have much recourse im afraid.

(At some point in the future it will be consigned in the same bin as smacking, but we're not there yet. With the exception of progressive countries like Denmark)

If you're genuinely concerned the baby has been abandoned or something then please call social services. My friends neighbour was leaving her baby actually alone in her flat to go to the shops etc, the police/social services will get involved in that sort of situation.

It really is horrendous.

Maybe worth keeping an ear out to see if it continues. My 7 month old has been a right little bugger to get to sleep tonight with the heat!

Our baby would cry for 3 hrs of an evening while being held. It was a living hell for us as well as him. I would not only think nothing of half an hour but I wouldn't assume they aren't with the child

My 17 month has just cried on and off for an hour trying to get him to sleep in cot, then back to my bed, then back to the cot, etc etc I've been with him the whole time, it's just the heat and teething.

If you are really concern of the cry, I would suggest to knock on the door and ask your neighbour if they need maybe some help with the baby. It's not easy for a mom to be all day with a baby and hear him crying and to try to calm him down.

They might not actually be leaving the baby on their own. I remember my brother when he was a baby was bloody terrible. Screamed in the bath, screamed out the bath, by the time you actually washed him and then put lotion on and dressed him it was a good half hour as he would resist so much. Then he would cry to sleep even though he was rocked. Some babies just take the witching hour to an extreme.

If you lived next door to me, you’d likely think my 15 month old is being murdered on a daily basis! Having his teeth brushed, changing his nappy, being told no and just about anything else he doesn’t like results in crying/tantrums.
My elderly neighbour (never had children) asked if everything was ok the other week. I had to explain some toddlers can be head strong, in my head the head strong was changed to arseholes.
Before anyone clutches their pearls, yes I know this is developmentally normal etc etc.
To add, I’m not a fan of the cry it out method, but I can completely empathise when parents feel it’s their only option. You also cannot tell from hearing a baby crying whether their parent/s are in the room. Some babies will cry regardless.

As a newborn my daughter cried for 16+h a day. She would routinely cry for over half an hour often am hour at night up to 2 even with us holding her.

I’d pop round with a cake / bottle of wine / chocolates / flowers and say something along the lines of “sounds like things are tough at the moment.”, you’ll likely find out if everything is ok and they may need a friendly ear. My son had colic, then teething …. nap / bedtimes were hard.

Yep. My babies both cried for hours through the night even when actually being held.

I could be right next to the cot patting, and stroking them and they’d still be crying.

i had this on too - last week when it was so hot. I was with her the whole time. She clung to me then got hot then cried I put her down to cool her (and myself) she wanted carrying this went on for 2 hours! In fact I was crying too because she was so distressed! In the end. Hubby suggested to reset. Popped her in the sling walked around the garden (still crying) then a bath (again), massage (again) change of pjs (just a vest and nappy) book, feed and in her sleeping bag. She slept eventually and right through the night, we were exhausted and in need of therapy!!

op, why don’t you ask? Are you friendly with them? Maybe just ask how baby is doing in a warm ancestor friendly way.

The problem is without the experience you cant recognise the cry. Generally when my baby crys i can what it means thats hunger thats irritable thats scared .

For example today mine was well fed but kept crying because he was very uncomfortable due to the heat .He even bit my boob out of protest he was in a foul mood .Wasn't until i gave him a cool shower he lightened up

for we know the baby could be teething meaning its hot and they are in pain ,i think anyone would cry for 30mins given that .

all you can do is keep a eye but dont intrude ,only voice concerns if you actually see something concerning

When my DD was around 3 months she would cry for hours non stop no matter what I did, this went on for months and months.

You can’t comment u til you have children yourself sorry.
Also wait until they are a toddler, when the real tantrums hit. 🤣 My child’s cried for 45mins before… I say cry loosely I mean scream…. All because I told her not to eat chocolate before dinner time (4:30pm this was) I caught her eating chocolate and so it went In the bin. You have no idea what stress a parent ( more so a mum who is usually at home with the baby) is under. It is advisable to walk away and leave a child crying to have some time out as levels of stress are high. The kindest thing you could do is leave a box of chocolates on her doorstep.

We sleep trained our babies. The health visitor actually recommended us to (I was pregnant, getting no sleep, all day & night nausea not helped with ds waking every hour at night). We would start by letting him cry 2mins, then go in, 5mins, go in, 10mins, go in… I would never leave it more than 10mins before going in, but he sometimes didn’t stop whining between the intervals so it might have sounded like he was crying for 30mins on his own. This lasted maybe 5 nights and then he learnt to settle himself. I then got a bit of sanity back 🥳 it didn’t impact negatively on our attachment or his ability to trust me (need to say this before I get piled on!)

If you’re worried go speak to them and ask. Ask if there’s anything you can do to help.

They may still be with the baby, sometimes they cry and it is very hard to get them to stop especially if they are colicky or have reflux - their tummy hurts. I don't think you need to worry if it's for such a short time. It's annoying for you but it won't last long

My child went through a phase of crying for up to 3 hours at a time when she was four months, no amount of snuggling, boobing, singing or bouncing would console her. I used to feel terrible for my neighbours, we are detached but the sound would still travel. She wasn't left alone at all but would still cry, it never occurred to me at the time that people may have thought I was just leaving her to it!