Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find it almost unbearable to spend an entire day with my 2.5 year old alone

65 replies

Hhahhhh · 28/06/2025 16:41

DS isn’t even that challenging by general standards. I am embarrassed to admit that he’s quite chilled and yet I utterly despair having to have a full day with him. I find it so frustrating. DP is working this weekend so he left before ds woke and will be back after he’s in bed

being elbowed or head butted from all the bouncing around
being unable to concentrate in a shop and having to watch his every move in case he grabs something or runs off (he doesn’t like the trolley seat)
being unable to chat to my friend for more than 5 minutes when meeting up with her and her child as it’s constant wanting my attention
clearing up. Toys, food, mess. Sick of it.
not being able to have silence from questions unless the tv is on which I try and avoid.
spending money just to get through the day. Staying at home all day not an option as the house would be an absolute state.

I honestly cannot fathom how I will ever look back on this and wish I was still in it. As a baby it was so easy in comparison. I feel like I’m at work with no break for 13 hours.

Of course there are lovely moments and I’ve had some lovely moments today but 90% or the time it’s been an absolute fucking slog. Am I missing something? How can people enjoy this?!

OP posts:
jetlag92 · 28/06/2025 19:53

Yes, little boys are utterly exhausting at that age. To put it into perspective, when DS1 was 2.5, I also had a 6 month old!
You need to treat him like one of those dog breeds which have lots of energy.
The latest we could ever get out of the house was 9am, he got up at 5.30am!

If you have membership for a farm park, they're usually great and they can do the same thing every couple of days.

DS2 was a bit more chilled, but still needed to get out by 9am.

Don't go to shops, your DH can do that on the way home, plan to be outside for as much time as possible and then there is less clearing up - picnics etc.

They soon grow out of it.

BrendaTheBlendeer · 28/06/2025 19:54

Raindropsandroses123 · 28/06/2025 18:05

I’ll also add…. You’re a mum of a boy!! Mum of 3 boys here! They are feral things compared to girls.. like little creatures from space! Girls just like to sit and colour in while boys like to run off and climb the walls…. Well that is certainly what I feel anyways! 😃 It’s just the card we dealt but hopefully we’ll be laughing when they are teenagers! Very stereotypical and generic I know… probably won’t work out that way!

This is total bullshit. Some kids like colouring, some kids like being active. Nothing to do with boy or girl.

Anyway, OP, a long day on your own can feel a bit relentless. I'd say manage your expectations eg how much actual conversation you'll ever have, and do things that are easy because they're focused on your child IE not shopping.

crackofdoom · 28/06/2025 19:58

FiveWhatByFiveWhat · 28/06/2025 17:11

This is at least the third active thread of "I dread/can't stand being around my child"... honestly wtf is going on? It's depressing to be honest.

I think finally women are able to be honest about motherhood.

LavenderHaze19 · 28/06/2025 20:14

I found my oldest incredibly difficult and hard work at that age. My second was so much easier and I didn’t feel like that at all with him. A lot depends on your child’s temperament. But I totally get it OP. It’s exhausting.

Zapx · 28/06/2025 20:18

Can you get memberships to anywhere that take the pressure off a bit? Picnic, day out, I find my 2yo much more agreeable at home if we’ve been out for a significant time.

redrose115 · 28/06/2025 20:29

My DD is the same age. She is on full steam ahead too. At childcare most of her friends are boys who ask right away can she run with them through the garden. While it can be repetitive, I take her out to a park, give her bubbles and a ball, and we just charge around for ages. I sit down when I can. There’s always more energy when it is time to leave, even though I am ready to collapse from exhaustion! She doesn’t sit still for long enough to do arts or crafts (at childcare they do this but I do notice she doesn’t really get many photos with this activity and more playing sport or playing with friends outside).

Going to the shops together is out. No leads or trolley or stroller will work. She was out of the stroller a long time ago.

I recharge by taking planned leave from work and when DH is also in the office, so I can have some time to relax at home, with no one demanding anything.

TwoFeralKids · 28/06/2025 20:43

FiveWhatByFiveWhat · 28/06/2025 17:11

This is at least the third active thread of "I dread/can't stand being around my child"... honestly wtf is going on? It's depressing to be honest.

Nice to see motherhood not sugar-coated.

TwoFeralKids · 28/06/2025 20:44

@Raindropsandroses123 Ha. My girl still doesn't like to sit down for long. She certainly was feral.

Raindropsandroses123 · 28/06/2025 20:53

BrendaTheBlendeer · 28/06/2025 19:54

This is total bullshit. Some kids like colouring, some kids like being active. Nothing to do with boy or girl.

Anyway, OP, a long day on your own can feel a bit relentless. I'd say manage your expectations eg how much actual conversation you'll ever have, and do things that are easy because they're focused on your child IE not shopping.

Hence why I was saying I was being very stereotypical and generic…
you clearly have a sense of human failure, I was trying to relate to the OP.

Beetlebumz · 28/06/2025 20:58

It’s hard yeah but what did you expect

BrendaTheBlendeer · 28/06/2025 22:21

Raindropsandroses123 · 28/06/2025 20:53

Hence why I was saying I was being very stereotypical and generic…
you clearly have a sense of human failure, I was trying to relate to the OP.

I don't find reinforcing outdated stereotypes that are harmful to kids funny. 🤷‍♀️

hqsheqjaqw · 29/06/2025 07:20

Morning OP. Just realised my post was only sharing in your misery and not offering any helpful advice. Apologies for typing in a rush (3 kids under 5 so all hands on deck a lot of the time!).

One of the things that is difficult is just having one child. I'm in no way suggesting the answer is to have another child, just sharing an observation that friends of mine who only have one or who have bigger age gaps than me so only had one child when their eldest was your sons age found it HARD work. They want to play with you all the time! Mine rarely ask to play with me as they have each other to fight play with 😂 which both occupies them and wears them out! Appreciate there isn't anything that can be done about it but it does help to keep perspective. I know when I only had one I used thinking fml I find this so hard how does anyone have more than one?!! And the truth of that is some bits are harder with more than one child and some bits are easier.

The answer definitely lies in getting out of the house and doing as much interesting stuff as you can think of. Museums (some are excellent and very interactive for children), farms, play parks, role play cafes, soft play, splash park, literally anywhere you can think of. A ride on the bus or train. We have NT membership which means somewhere new with open space to run around and hopefully a nice bit of cake in the cafe. A few "big" days out a year to the theme park or zoo or similar. They love going to things like our village fete or country shows where you can see the animals and there's lots of tractors to look at.

Persist in going to the church hall type toddler groups. Find one you like with a few mums you enjoy chatting to. Even if DS clings to you, he won't forever. The more you go, the more confident he will be. At this age children mostly play alongside each other but in a few months they will start doing some simple cooperative play together and that will be the point where he will branch out and you will get to drink your coffee!

At home, just having one or two boxes of toys out helps. I periodically tidy up when I notice they're not playing with it anymore or at certain key points of the day (before we go out, before nap time, before dinner). Seems to refresh their interest in it if I pick it all up again. Having some fun garden toys helps too. Sandpit, water table, paddling pool at this time of year.

Don't be afraid to let him watch a bit of tv if you just need a bit of a break. Mine watch way more tv than usual when I'm pregnant and struggling. Stick CBeebies on and breathe. Loads of educational stuff on CBeebies. But mine also love tractor ted and a monthly subscription to that has bought me hours of peace!

Setting up a few simple activities once or twice a week and baking together once a week helps me feel like I'm offering them some chances to learn and be creative. We also read lots of books, I practice reading with my eldest and my middle is busy learning his letters and numbers at the moment. My youngest will soon be able to start learning colours etc. thinking of fun ways to teach them things can be really rewarding. My eldest loves cars for example so we used to practice looking at the number plates of cars we saw and seeing if he could recognise any of the letters or numbers.

If you can invest in a balance bike and a little three wheel scooter for him. My middle one is a whirlwind of physical energy and he was excellent on both of these by 2.5. Wears him out well!! My eldest is now confidently peddling having come straight from a balance bike and skipped stabilisers. Hoping to do the same with my middle one soon, so more opportunities to tire him out haha!

Don't bother going food shopping. Get it delivered or in our house, it's now my DH job on his way home from work. Amazon prime any random things you need to save the stress of shops.

Take reins and the pushchair everywhere. If he runs off, he has to be contained in some way. Even if he screams or thrashes. If he behaves like that you can always leave. Mine have soon learned if they mess me around by running off they will be back in the pram and if they don't listen to me I will just go home. Didn't take them long to get the idea haha.

Be well prepared with easy to eat, low mess snacks for tricky moments. Mine know that once we're back in the pram and ready to leave the park it will be snack time. Makes going much less painful! Eating outside as much as you can. Snacks in the garden this time of year, picnic in the park on the way home from wherever you've been. Less mess to clean up at home.

Most importantly, make some mum friends with other children roughly the same age. Yep, you won't ever get a full sentence out to each other but it's far more enjoyable doing things together. The days are long and lonely otherwise.

Hang in there OP. My eldest was such bloody hard work as a toddler and he is a delight now. My youngest is still little and lovely and hasn't yet hit this stage 🫣. My middle one is thick in the seriously hard work toddler years. This time though I know it's just his age and in time it will all improve! No doubt in a year or so my youngest will be a nightmare. I used to think I must have done something seriously wrong for them to be such hard work, now I know that they're all hard work at this age.

RCJJ · 29/06/2025 07:32

FiveWhatByFiveWhat · 28/06/2025 17:11

This is at least the third active thread of "I dread/can't stand being around my child"... honestly wtf is going on? It's depressing to be honest.

Bloody hell. There’s always one 😒

@Hhahhhh Please ignore this mean spirited comment and there has been some really good advice in this thread, that I would echo - 2.5 is such a difficult age you cannot take your eyes off the ball once! Mine are 7 and I can absolutely promise you it gets easier. Even from around 3/3.5 it starts feeling less like living through a toddler episode of Jackass.

Of course, like you say, there are these wonderful pockets and moments of joy but the long days with toddlers really can feel relentless at times. I used to say the exact same to my DH, are we really going to miss this?? We were absolutely dog tired and in marriage counselling! We’ve all made it through, and if someone asks me now would I ever have more kids I just laugh; I’ve made it through the trenches and have no desire to go back there!!

Hang in there, OP. Some really good advice in this thread and I hope some of it is helpful for you :)

Packetofcrispsplease · 30/09/2025 22:35

“ I feel like I’m at work with no break for 13 hours “ I need to show my husband this as I did this for 3 children with no help and was a SAHM with no nursery places for my children, so it was every day 🤪
He thought I was just faffing about at home doing nothing

SalamiSammich · 30/09/2025 22:38

Are you a full time SAHP?

It was so.much easier going back to work. Something to think on.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread