To think this woman needs to stop jumping the queue every day?

[susanandlucypevensie]

My child's nursery has a queuing system and drop off can be painfully slow. You have to queue along the narrow path that runs from the car park at the back, down to the front door, with a fence the runs all along the path, then from the front door there is a gate that opens out onto the street and you can go. The manager on the door is an older lady and likes to take her time chatting to each parent, asking how the child is, getting a full handover, and if you don't get near the front nice and early you can be stood there for 20 minutes or more.
The path where we queue is wide enough for someone to stand, with or without a buggy.
There is one woman that turns up every day with one of those big, wide, side-by-side buggies for her two kids. She can't get it down the narrow path to queue, so she just goes straight to the front door to hand her kids over, where the manager will talk to her at length about each kid individually for ages. Today, she also wanted to discuss her funding so this took even longer.
AIBU to think she should bugger off with her double buggy and queue like everyone else? carry or put the one year old in a sling and get the 2 year old to walk or stand in the queue? It already takes forever and I find it really unfair she gets to queue-jump.

Or I’d change my drop off time to later or earlier when no one else was there and I’d ask beforehand how to manage this to be more efficient

Nobody should queue jump but you saying she shouldn’t use her double buggy makes you unreasonable.

Unless you have two very small children or multiples you don’t know the strain of something as simple as the school run.

I said unreasonable, but because it’s the nursery, not the woman, that is causing the problem.

Speak to the owners of the nursery, not the manager. That's ridiculous. People have buses and trains to catch to work and need to drop and go.

Does this daft manager have kids queuing in all weather's,?
I can't imagine the kids are too thrilled,queuing, when it's pouring down ,or snowing or boiling hot either ,she's unnecessarily upsetting the kids

It’s a stupid system but at the end of the day she’s still jumping the queue.

The jumping part is easily solvable: when she gets there, she checks who’s last before her, then steps aside and goes in after that person. She doesn’t have to jump the queue, she’s just taking advantage of the buggy excuse.

I definitely haven't posted this before, but someone else from the same nursery might have!

It all sounds slow and frustrating.I wouldn’t stand back while this woman jumps the queue either. Sounds like the drop off system needs drastic changes.

Steps aside where? The buggy doesn't even fit down the path they queue.

More detail - sorry, I didn't mean to drip feed.

The nursery is round the corner and about a 2 minute walk from my eldest's school and then another 2 minutes from there to my work, so it's super convenient to me, especially since I don't drive. So I can't really change nurseries, as the other nurseries available are well out of my way and wouldn't work with me getting to work on time on foot or on public transport.

It's not attached to a school, but it is a small "pop-up" nursery and not a permanent setting, they rent out a space in a community hall and pack everything away at the end of the day. The community hall is used for other things as well, scouts, slimming world groups etc.

You have three options for drop-off: 8am, 8:30am, or 9am. The door only open at those times, you can't turn up any time you like in between. Most people choose 9am as that is the only session you can use your funding on. I could use an earlier drop off but I'd have to pay extra and I'd be hanging around for ages because I don't start work until 9:30, my work doesn't open until 9:15 and I don't have a car to sit in.

Because I drop my eldest off at school nearby, I get there early, about 8:45, but so do lots of other school mums, so I'm generally about 5th or 6th in the queue (my child's class teacher is always the last one to open her doors) and I wait 5-10 minutes after the doors are opened at 9am. There's probably about 20 people in the queue on any given day so the further back you are, the longer you wait. I was at the back once and I was late for work that day (I start at 9:30am!)

Doublepushchair lady turns up at 9am and goes straight to the front, where the people in front of me let her in. She sort of eases her buggy in through the gate, slowly, as though she were edging out into traffic, and people step back and the manager is all smiles, letting her straight through. Every day I hope to be first so I can refuse to acknowledge her, or refuse to step back for her, but I never make it.

Several of us have complained, in writing, to the owner. Nothing is done. The manager is always just her usual bright, breezy self, completely unaware or uncaring and acts the same every day. And yes, in all weathers.

It's maddening

Then just do what she does and go right up to the front. Either the rest of the parents grow a spine and make enough fuss that this idiocy ends, or you don't have to be part of it any more. Win win.

What a ridiculous system and it would drive most people mad. I used to practically slingshot DD into nursery and dash off to work, I don’t want a leisurely chat on the door.

Either you need to
a) continue to silently seethe
b) grab the bull by the horns and confront cheeky buggy fucker
or
c) conclude that if you can’t beat them, join them and also start pushing to the front.

Considering you’ll still be hanging around for ages with the first two options I’d be tempted to go for the latter. Do you have allies in the queue? Could a group of you just decide to change the drop off process by force? Just waltz up, push little one forward and say ‘in you go, mummy needs to get to work, bye!’ Unless you have specific issues you need to discuss surely you don’t need to have a full conversation every day and it would support the children’s independence to encourage them to go in themselves and try putting their own belongings on their peg.

I'd turn up at 9, go straight to the front and physically hand your kid over and just say 'in a rush today, can't wait in the queue'.

Or write to the manager and point out that you are losing out on 50 minutes of funding a week, or a whole 30 hours over the school year - tell her you need to drop off at 9am not wait until 9.10 to be let in.

Aside, stay behind, whatever - the fact is that she only needs to go in after the person who was in front of her when she arrived. She’s playing dumb and getting away with it.

Or she doesn't really have anywhere else to go because she'd just be blocking everyone else with her double buggy.

OP also said that the people at the front let her go ahead. It isn't like she just pushes them aside to get in.

It's a stupid system anyway, if more people just went ahead to drop off their child then they would have little choice but to change it.

Surely those drop off times overlap if she's taking such a ridiculously long time to get the kids settled,?
I can't see how this system is helping anyone least of all the children?

This. The main issue is the ridiculous system, not the queue jumper!

Honestly, I couldn’t be arsed with that, it used to take me 2 minutes to drop my DS off. I’d be going straight to the front. Handing her my child and leaving, saying “sorry I don’t have time to wait”. Who has 20 mins to hang about every morning? It’s completely unreasonable of the nursery to expect parents to do this every morning. I wouldn’t be engaging her in a big chat though and making everyone wait even longer. That’s CF behaviour.

Is it a Montessori nursery by any chance? Would be a crazy coincidence but this nursery owner sounds like a nutty previous manager of mine 😅

Kindy, you and all the parents are ridiculous for going along with it. I wouldn't normally support a queue jumper but in this case I applaud her. No way I'd be waiting and making my child wait for up to 20 minutes for no reason than this woman wants to have a long chat with everyone! She should do it at pick up if necessary. You and all the parents need to grow a spine and not engage in conversation, drop say no time to chat and leave. Each parent needs to do this. You're all the problem!!

Actually I don’t think the staff member is lovely. I think she’s incredibly thoughtless and self-indulgent!

I agree. Her making the children, let alone adults wait like this is beyond selfish. Think about how much time your child is wasting each month when they should be inside playing or learning something. I still think this is entirely on the parents though for enabling this behaviour. Either you drop your child inside or she needs to sort out the process.

Then complain in writing again a little more firmly that she’s making people late for work and it isn’t fair letting one parent keep jumping the queue when the rest of you have been waiting so long. Maybe if the parents stopped being so passive and letting her do it this would have stopped a long time ago

A review on TrustPilot maybe?

Or all parents group together for a jointly signed complaint?

Ask for a cost reduction. Many people are probably losing at least an hour over the week, if people start taking that off their payments, the nursery will do something.