To think this woman needs to stop jumping the queue every day?

[susanandlucypevensie]

My child's nursery has a queuing system and drop off can be painfully slow. You have to queue along the narrow path that runs from the car park at the back, down to the front door, with a fence the runs all along the path, then from the front door there is a gate that opens out onto the street and you can go. The manager on the door is an older lady and likes to take her time chatting to each parent, asking how the child is, getting a full handover, and if you don't get near the front nice and early you can be stood there for 20 minutes or more.
The path where we queue is wide enough for someone to stand, with or without a buggy.
There is one woman that turns up every day with one of those big, wide, side-by-side buggies for her two kids. She can't get it down the narrow path to queue, so she just goes straight to the front door to hand her kids over, where the manager will talk to her at length about each kid individually for ages. Today, she also wanted to discuss her funding so this took even longer.
AIBU to think she should bugger off with her double buggy and queue like everyone else? carry or put the one year old in a sling and get the 2 year old to walk or stand in the queue? It already takes forever and I find it really unfair she gets to queue-jump.

The mum shouldn't queue jump but assuming she is bringing the double buggy because that's how she gets her kids home, putting it where it fits is an ABSOLUTE necessity!

Bigger issue is 20 mins queuing. Nope, just nope, even if there's 30 parents at the same time, the nursery should be able to get them all out in 10 mins or probably less. My son went to a childminder and sometimes I got there at the same time as another parent with 2 kids. Unless she NEEDED a one-to-one chat with someone, she could have all three out in a couple of mins. If nursery can't then they need to not do part of their handover process, or do it in a different way like upload info on an app.

Generally, I disagree with queue jumpers, but if her double buggy doesn't fit then it doesn't fit, and I certainly wouldn't be tolerating a 20 minute drop off, I have about 2 minutes to get mine through the door or I'd be late for work.

Can’t she park her buggy and join the rest of you in line?

I had a very short window of drop off and collection with work, that system would have had me hopping up and down in frustration.

How hard is it to go “Bobby, Ahmed, Mabel, Alex, your grown ups are here! Fred, sit down I didn’t call you! Ali, your grandma is walking up the path, get your coat!”

Tell us the name of the nursery and where, if we all email and complain they will have to take action!!!

That woule annoy me do much, I’d have to be first in line or find another nursery.

This would drive me insane!

I'd tackle the queuing itself tbh. That's the main issue.

Yes - maybe don’t queue yourself just walk to the front of the queue and say you’re really sorry but you’re in a rush. It’s a horrid way for the kids to start their day as well. They could get cold, wet and if not 100% happy lots of time to think about it before they’re handed over. Maybe the nursery needs to do stagger drop off slots, a quicker handover or more people there to meet and greet x

This would give me the rage. You must have the patience of a saint

The system is stupid but we’ve all had to wait in stupid systems.

I can’t believe you haven’t pulled the cheeky parent. I’d have done it at the first or second offence.

She can’t queue if her buggy doesn’t fit, but she can certainly see who is at the end of queue when she gets there and wait her turn. I’ve done that a few times when needed in the past.

Needless to say, I wouldn’t be waiting 20 mins to drop my kid off, I’d take him straight to the front and say I have to get to work to make a point. I’m sure if you start doing it, others will soon follow.

I do sometimes have a similar 20 min wait on pick up, as you get some parents (always the same ones) that want to chew the keyworkers ears off, I wait 5 mins and then end up just ringing the bell to his room, knocking on the door or I try to catch my sons eye because he then runs to get his bag and stands by the door which makes it awkward for the chatter box inside. Last thing I want to do after a day is work is wait a stupid amount of time to pick my son up, I still have to go home and cook etc, some people have no respect for other peoples time, drives me insane.

I'd be changing nursery with this BS going on. Usually it's a go in, sign your child in quickly and leave scenario. Who has time for this when you need to go to work? 🤷🏻‍♀️

Can't she fold her buggy or park it somewhere. Queue jumping really winds me up.

Absolute madness! I've never heard of anything so ridiculous at a nursery. tbh I can't believe parents haven't complained enough about it for them to make changes. I can't imagine standing for 20 minutes, potentially in the pouring rain.

They need to visit some other nurseries and see how it's done!

Why are you standing there waiting? Walk up, hand child over, smile and say “see you at 5pm” and walk off. You all sound nuts.

Has anyone actually said anything to this mum, @susanandlucypevensie? Or tried to stop her waltzing past the rest of the queue?

If I were you, I’d be ‘accidentally’ blocking her way every day.

YANBU to be frustrated—but this sounds more like a nursery systems issue than a buggy problem. The setup clearly isn’t working for anyone: not for parents queuing, not for the staff, and not for the mum with the double buggy who likely doesn’t want to be awkward, but has no real option.
The nursery needs a better drop-off system—staggered times, a quick handover line, or a separate space for longer chats. Until that’s sorted, it’s just breeding resentment among parents who are all doing their best under a clunky setup.

Your annoyance is misplaced and needs to be redirected towards the nursery owner… if I had work to get to on a time deadline after this then I’d be going ballistic. If it didn’t change very quickly I’d have to choose another nursery. Employers aren’t exactly going to be sympathetic to lateness every day because Helen fancied a good chit chat about Timmy. It used to annoy me enough when some parent dressed in gym gear with clearly lots of time to spare and no work to go to would try and hog the owner’s time bang on opening with the most mundane questions ever and slow everyone else down who had work immediately afterwards. Honestly either pick up the phone later in the day or ask at pick up. That wasn’t the owner’s fault in fairness- just the same parent bombarding her every single day. Your situation however is entirely preventable.

I don’t think the OP is being unreasonable to be annoyed at the queue-jumping woman and the nursery drop-off system, @PeppyLilacLion.

Anyone who is swanning past a queue of people waiting to do exactly the same thing as she is, without a word of excuse or apology, on a daily basis, is a cheeky fucker.

I am a bit surprised that no-one has said “Excuse me - we are all waiting to drop our children off - there’s a queue and you need to wait in it just like the rest of us!”

Why queue, it’s a ridiculous system? Just go to the front and say you can’t wait, don’t engage in conversation with her unless necessary. If you all stop chit chatting with her, then it will stop.

Yeah I get that but there could be a multitude of reasons that aren’t advertised to the whole queue… my son is severely autistic and I’d have spent that ‘queue’ time trying to stop him bolting into a main road, eating drainage pebbles or just throwing himself on the ground and then refusing to move. They won’t be telling the other parents something like that. The system is completely flawed is my point- I can’t imagine it does any ‘normal’ child good waiting in a queue for ages either- doing more harm than good.

But if the whole system is stupid and there doesn't need to be a queue at all then the sooner everyone starts doing what this woman is doing and ignoring it the better

I would start doing exactly the same as her then, and get the others to follow suit

Yep the queue jumping isn't the problem, the queuing system is. Nobody should be waiting for 20 minutes to drop a child off. There should be multiple staff available to take in children at opening time.

Re the woman jumping the queue, maybe she has something agreed with the nursery, which may or may not be unfair - but again the system is still the the problem.

Ugh, my nursery did similar during COVID but even then they'd look down the queue and take anyone for that room at the same time. Then someone else would come and collect for another room etc.
After COVID we were allowed to enter the building using a fob and knock on the room door and they'd pop out with child or in the older rooms you could go in and collect.
Nursery opened at 8am and I had to be at work by 8.15am so really right on time. I couldn't be doing with this queuing nonsense.

There were a few times they didn't have enough staff so we had to wait with our kids. I kicked off massively and got refunds. I'm a teacher so minimal capacity to be late. It happened so many times I almost had a disciplinary.

Presumably that's 20-30 minutes waiting time that you're paying them for? It's too long a waiting time, and I would move nursery if complaints don't work. Don't they realise you have to get to work?

I’d change nurseries for this alone tbh. What a faff!!