To report my neighbour to social services

[ArtfulGoldWriter]

Neighbours have 2 kids age 4 & 2. The
mother has been screaming at the oldest for 3 years and now the other one too. It’s worse in the summer as our terraced street can hear it with the windows open. It’s horrendous- it sounds like emotional abuse.

It’s pretty much every day and the poor kids sound so distressed and terrified. It’s not so bad when the dad is there but when he’s at work, I don’t think she can cope and so she just screams at them. She works a couple of days a week and the older one is in primary school.

Its so hard to know what to do but it’s horrible to hear it- it’s like she hates them 😪

For context, I have written out an anonymous referral a few times but never sent it. I am treading a line between not wanting to interfere and just finding it unbearable

I’m a SW - Adolescents not Family Safeguarding but I think you should absolutely refer it in to Children's Social Care. Try to give as much information as possible; the tone; language used; if swearing is around or at the children; context - is it mainly when they are outside in the garden being silly or late at night / getting out the door; children’s reactions, tears , do they appear fearful; what’s actually being said and times of day etc.

you can ask to remain anonymous but be clear you are a neighbour and have witnessed this first hand for sure though.

A MASH ( Multi Agency Safeguarding Hub) enquiry will be undertaken where mum will be spoken to about the referral and all the partners - health, education, police, social care, possibly housing, probation of will share relevant information/concerns regarding the family, make an assessment around safeguarding and next steps, and offer appropriate support/interventions.

Three years is a long time
How much shouting ? How often ?

I base what I said on things that have happened. Child X went to school with a sporting injury. It was obvious it was that sort of injury and he said it was! . He’s a nice kid from a nice family. But head Teacher was on the phone to SS right away. SS hounded his family for a year. It was actually the son who kept telling SS to leave his family alone and help his friend who was being abused at home. SS didn’t listen to him! His friend ended up hospitalized and SS still didnt get involved with his friends family. That’s just one example of lots but I don’t want to be too outing

You literally have nothing to add here…🤡

Have you submitted the referral online as you said it is in draft ?
I guess you put the thread up for advice and other people like me who work in safeguarding have all said the same.
Do include a phone number as the MASH worker I spoke about upthread will want to call you back and will have lots of questions to try and build a picture of exactly what is going on and ascertain the level of risk/concern.

They won’t call tonight it will be in the morning/within 72 hours

We briefly had a neighbor like this. She was a bit of a disaster by all accounts. My partner had to throw two different guys out of her flat for smashing the place up and threatening her. I had to throw her landlord's son out when he turned up unannounced and let himself in chasing unpaid rent.

I don't know what happened but at some point she just turned on her kids, I guess she'd hit breaking point. We knocked on the door a few times when it got bad and eventually reported her.

Few weeks after that I was convinced I'd heard her hitting one of them. I had to shout through the letterbox that I was going to kick the door through if she didn't open it. She eventually let me me in and one of the kids started crying that 'Mummy pulled my hair'. I'd have leveled her if the children weren't there. I took them round to ours and called the police.

She did get them back in the end but they did a runner in the middle of the night not long after. I often wonder about those kids :-(

Please report. If you find this unbearable, think what it must be like for those children.

If you are still in any doubt about it, try the NSPCC initially.

snap. I know of family’s who got reported for nothing even. Some mum on here was dismissing this! Joke is on her as it’s so true

Honestly, I think if you're hearing mum, exasperatedly raising her voice saying, "Get down!" As I do 100000 times a day it's different to hearing actual abusive shouting.
If its more than a parent who's just loud, then please report this.
SS has really quite high threshold for involvement, but all of the information they receive can help the family ultimately to be happier, healthier, better or to get those children out of the current situation

I am stressed and worried about the family next door, the children scream and swear all day long at each other and the mum does nothing to intervene. There are 4 children from 3 up to 16 and an enormous dog that barks in a 2 bed house. My partner doesn't want me to report it for fear of trouble from them. I've only been living here for a year but its got worse and is affecting my health, tried to speak nicely to them but was accused of poisoning their dog...throwing glass over the fence at the kids..they are absolutely unhinged. I've started to record the screaming. I want very much to report it but my partners mum is very unwell and don't know if he would cope with more stress. In my mind there is emotional abuse in that family. How do I report this anonymously without my partner knowing?

You need to start a new post rather than posting on one that’s a year old. People will advise you rather than the original op.

Yeah, me and my siblings were in this situation as well, abusive adults often tell children no one cares about them and no one will listen to them, so not reporting reinforces that message.

Sorry, didn’t realise the previous poster was replying to an old thread.

I thought I had..I'm new to this

I grew up with a screaming angry dad and was fearful as an adult , tried to please adults making myself vulnerable and being scared of peoples reactions as I became an adult . A long time in therapy helped me see it came from being screamed at as a child - please report this asap

Bad things happen when good people do nothing

You think that social services need to create work to look busy? Seriously?

What the hell have you waited 3 years? She’s been screaming at her kid since they were 1? That’s a lot of damage already.

call them now and report the extent and chronicity of it.

start noting down some examples as evidence.

DO IT NOW

It’s not interfering.

safeguarding is EVERYONES business

Swap out the word ‘interfere’ at the end of your post and replace it with ‘save these children from abuse’.
How unsure are you now?

Try phoning the NSPCC.