To wear this bridesmaid dress when I’m not a bridesmaid?

[IcyBlonde15]

I was meant to be bridesmaid for a friend 2 years ago, long story short the wedding didn’t happen but I still have the dress I was supposed to wear. I was gutted I wouldn’t get wearing as I loved it. My brother is getting married this summer, and the bride asked me to be bridesmaid but I have chose to just be a guest based on having young children with me etc. I have been wondering about possibly wearing my bridesmaid dress for this occasion. Her wedding party are all in black so there’s no chance I will clash with them or be mistaken for a bridesmaid. Do you think I could wear this dress or is it just to bridesmaidy? Opinions welcome

It’s very bridesmaidy OP

I'm afraid not, it's a bridesmaids dress. Maybe a good dressmaker could alter it into something more appropriate.

I'd wear it.

No I wouldn’t, it screams bridesmaid I’m afraid.

Ask your future SIL. If her bridesmaids are all in black she may well be fine with your choice.

No, it's not a guest dress at all. The fabric and the length shout 'bridesmaid'

I'd definitely wear it. If the bridal party are in black it's totally different, I'd only not wear it if I want sure what the bridesmaids were wearing

I don't think it looks particularly bridesmaidy at all. Certainly not from the front, maybe the bow at the back but how much will people be staring at your back if you're not walking down the aisle?

I think when you have to ask, it means you shouldn't wear it. It wouldn't bother me personally, but if even you think it could be the wrong choice. Just get a different one from Vinted if you want to keep costs very low, or from any normal shop if you have no limited budget.

Ask your SIL. It doesn’t matter what people say on here, she’s the one who should have the final say.

I would wear it

I'd get the bow removed and ask the bride.

I think it's unfair to ask the brides - what do you expect them to do? Even if they would mind, they won't tell you, you put them on the spot and dont' actually resolve anything.

Not many people would say "I would prefer you'd wear something else", no one does that, unless you are on full bridezilla mode.

If you hadn't of told the story behind the dress and just asked if it was appropriate to wear to your brothers formal wedding everyone would have raved about it being perfect.
I would wear it OP, a bridesmaid dress is just a dress 🤷🏻‍♀️ it's beautiful x

It’s very bridesmaidy. But as you were asked to be one, I’d ask SIL if she’d be okay with you wearing it.
It’s not a dress I’ve ever seen a “guest” wearing though.

I think if the bow was removed you could if its a formal wedding and everyone is dressing up. Why not ask the bride her opinion.

Remove the bow though, it's awful x

I agree. It just looks like a long "normal" frock, to me. Its lovely btw, I'm not being critical, it just doesn't look bridesmaidy to me

As it's very different to what the bridal party are wearing, go for it. You're close family, it's nice to be dressed up.

Bridesmaids are usually styled differently to guests with things like flowers and hair styling, so there's another difference.

If it was going to blend more with the colour scheme and other bridesmaids that would be different.

It depends on the relationship of course but the OP says she was initially asked to be bridesmaid so I assume she has a decent enough relationship with her future SIL, she can ask.

OP "honest opinion, am I okay to wear this as a guest? No worries if not, happy to get a new dress"
SIL "Oh gosh no it's a lovely dress, feel free to wear it"

Simples!

I think you'd get away with the bow and not look like a bridesmaid if you got it shortened.

It is 100% a bridesmaid dress, I wouldn't wear that. Just opt for something typically guest ish instead and avoid the awkwardness that turning up in that would lead to.

Gosh. I'd have to disagree. In my experience (last week) wedding guests wore very elaborate long dresses! And it was 'just' a village hall wedding. I felt quite underdressed in my maxi dress!

Could you get it taken up? I think if it was knee length or just above it would be fine. Otherwise I probably wouldn't tbh

Can you get it shortened