To think horse riding is too dangerous?

[bellav]

DD10 developed a sudden love for horses after we read War Horse together last autumn.

She has asked for riding lessons and as yet we have said no due to cost but we had secretly planned to get her a few for her birthday next month.

But I have now got cold feet after reading stories on here about serious injuries and even deaths among riders doing mundane things like riding indoors in "safe" conditions.

One article linked said it is more dangerous than riding a motorbike, with a serious accident every 350 hours vs 7000. I know many of these are from cross-country etc, but I can't help worry about the ones that aren't.

AIBU to not want to start down this path?

I ride weekly at a local stables who are good with H&S and their horses. In the years I’ve riding I’ve come off three times and once has an injury which made me limp a bit, otherwise just a bit bruised and stuff. I normally do flat work and hacking, not jumping and cross-country.

I also ride a bike and have ended up in hospital and had a nasty infection after falling off on the road. My friends who cycle and play football have also had much worse injuries than me.

Obviously the correct clothing and safety equipment is key, but it’s not dangerous by definition and it’s not all the same level of danger. Make sure the stable is an approved one, and ask parents for their recommendations.

Yes, yes and yes. From a fellow ‘horsey girl’ who is 33 and very much wishes she could still be a ‘horsey girl’….all of this!!

I rode since I was 8, loved it. However in 2015, age 57, I had a serious accident, in an indoor school, which has more or less wrecked me. So yes serious accidents can happen even when you’re not doing anything risky.

Knowing what I know now would I still have ridden? On balance yes I would, it was a compulsion, I couldn’t not have. So no advice I’m afraid.

To be honest, she's far more likely to suffer a nasty injury from a trampolining accident in a garden. More than half of all girls' accidents needing A&E visits are trampoline-related.

TBF there are probably far more hours spent on trampolines with zero training than their is on horses.
Nobody follows the one at.a time on trampolines either.

I have a motorbike now and used to ride, I don’t think you can really compare the risks because so much depends on what kind of rider/biker you are.

One thing I would say is I spent all my weekends as a teenager at the yard and that was definitely better in so many ways than hanging around the shopping centre like I did before starting to ride.

Spending my teenage years at the yard all weekend with my mates was the best thing. We'd sit in hay bales hanging out then go for long hacks, galloping together across fields, or have a jumping competition in the arena. So much fun. I remember going for a hack at 9pm on a summer's night, on a school night as well. It was awesome.

It's just not the same as an adult. More responsibility and awareness I guess.

Same here. I can remember going riding all summer, t-shirts tucked up into our a-cup bras, feet not in our stirrups, nicking peas from a farmer field and then riding home through the woods jumping all the fallen branches. Good times 🥹

I fell off many times, was bitten, kicked, squashed, leg jammed against a gate... riding and stable stuff was the best thing I ever did between ages-5-14 and if your daughter wants that experience, gosh let her have it. You learn care, intuition, responsibility, as well as how to connect with the horses and riding is amazing. I miss it alot, will start again when I am able to. Never knew of anyone who had a serious accident irl.

I’ve ridden horses for 46 years. I am a Team GB rider in my discipline. I also hold a motorcycle licence - I’ve had 1 serious riding accident to date and 2 serious motorcycle accidents. I also ski (no accidents, despite regularly throwing my self down World Cup ski runs) and I flying Boeing passenger jets for a living which according to MN means I am absolutely fucked. Would I give up my horses? No. Not for anything or anyone. You can remove the dangerous things from your life, but at the same time you suck the joy out of it too. If you asked me what makes me fearful when I think of my kids, it’s not horse riding, or skiing or motorbikes or any of that sort of stuff. It’s silly drinking incidents, where they make a bad decision. Or being at the wrong place at the wrong time when a bad thing kicks off.

Don’t suck the joy out of your kid’s life. If they want to ride, get them good lessons.

This is very interesting as most people seem in favour of riding whereas the other threads i have read on here were full of horror stories of people breaking their arm on lesson one or being concussed while trotting etc! Very confused now about what to do. Thanks everyone for the response.

Op of course riding has an element of danger but you can't wrap her up in cotton wool. Just about every sport has an element of risk.

People break limbs coming of bikes, playing football, injuries landing badly during dance routines. My nephew cracked an elbow coming of a sea-saw!

Getting out of bed has risk.
You can only mitigate the risk by choosing the school carefully. There's probably a market for secondhand kids riding boots and helmets.

I'll add even if the riding thing is only going to be a block of lessons for Birthday and Christmas it at least means you are able to come up with ideas for her that doesn't involve clutter and stuff.

When I was 10, I fell off a horse and spent two weeks in the hospital with a concussion.

Why? Because little me was riding a massive horse with no saddle, holding onto its hair, and—naturally—no helmet.

Ah yes, the good old '90s in Eastern Europe, where parents thought helmets were optional and gravity was a suggestion.

Still, zero regrets. I loved horse riding as a kid.

To think horse riding is too dangerous?

It is. But not for the reasons you think it is, OP. If eventually you get your own horse, and often more follow, your life will never be the same again. The amount of time and money they take is insane and other things in your lives often suffer. Your child's school work for instance. People who get 'addicted' often stay so for life. I'd do my best to not encourage it if I were you although you may well fail. Good luck!

The son of a very good friend died after he fell off a horse. He was 10 years old.
I do think it is worth considering the risk.

However, the risks are slim. I believe that life is for living rather than hiding away from things you live, just in case.
The bigger risk for me would be, will she fall in love with it and then you can't afford to keep up?

I don't think it is fair for you to prevent her from trying something she might really enjoy because of your own fears.

As long as you choose a good riding school, she will be fine.

It is much easier to learn to ride when you are young (I always wanted to ride as a kid but my parents never bothered to let me try). I learned as an adult and found it really enjoyable and good for confidence.

Lessons are cheaper for kids than adults and she can do group lessons which is a good way to meet friends as well.

Most sports also carry a risk of injury (dance, gymnastic, football, rugby, riding a bike, martial arts...).

The physical risk, I would consider, but then everything has a risk. Getting in a car is a risk, most of us do it daily without even thinking.
More of a consideration is can you keep up lessons? Just a few for birthday seems a bit cruel if she really enjoys it. Will it scratch the itch or make the itch worse.

I'm sorry to hear that. It's stories like that which are making me afraid. Cam i ask if that was just doing run of the mill arena stuff or something more adventurous?

Dd has a horse (small horse, big pony, he is right on the cusp between the two).
We have had him for nearly 10 years (got him when she was 12)
He is a tricky character and they have had their fair amount of scrapes.
Have I worried - hugely.
Has it been worth it for dd's physical and emotional wellbeing - hugely.

Let your dd have the lessons. Let her do stable-management day camps in the summer, find a riding school linked to pony club where she can work towards badges / camps / further her knowledge of horse care etc.
Physical fitness, friendships with other likeminded youngsters, a bond with horses, outdoors in all weathers.
It is good for the soul :)

I've had far more injuries doing dance than I ever did from riding!

I think you'll be fine with a few lessons. The danger is if they get the bug and go on to a lifelong obsession with horses... My friend who had a bad break coming off her horse was out hunting.

My Dsis is having this exact issue at the moment. Unfortunately with the benefit of experience whereby she worked in the industry for years, racing, eventing and showjumping and has seen that when it goes wrong it can go spectacularly wrong.

Sis actually stopped riding after the horse she was riding spooked and took off with her, fell on the road and she fractured her spine. Lost all confidence.

Its all very unpredictable and that’s her issue, horse or pony could be a complete saint but it only takes something out if the blue to cause an accident - horses aren’t machines. They are flight animals and once spooked their self preservation goes out the window.

At beginner level I would say it’s much safer and much more measured but once you’ve got the bug and progress more and do more faster and complicated stuff like jumping - is where more accidents start to happen.

The highs are highs - it’s a fun and exhilarating sport, looking after and caring for horses offers children and adults so much - that’s why they are used so much with therapy. The lows can be low, very low.

Let her try, if you can manage the cost - it might not be for her! If it is for her then I suppose you can only control what you can control.

Dsis says horses come between toys and boys so for that part she is keen !

I rode from when I was about 6, had my own Horses's since I was 10 and rode daily pretty much until my current horse had to retire a couple of years ago-at least 30 years.
My daughter sat on a pony as soon as she could sit up and rode competitively in county showing events until she was in her late teens and went off to uni, including riding just broken youngsters and backing her own pony. I had one big fall that needed an ambulance as a teen (showjumping rotational fall so not just plodding around) and my daughter, touch wood, has never had more than straight forward tumbles despite riding multiple ponies a day at points. So no, it's not too dangerous and is a wonderful, healthy outdoor hobby! Be warned though it's bloody expensive ha ha!!

I’ve never ridden and neither, to my younger dd’s enduring disappointment, have my children.
That was simply down to finances but I wish I could have given them the opportunity.
I used to ride a motorbike and I think that is more dangerous. The stats might show more motorbike accidents v horse accidents but it’s also about the severity of injuries.
On 24 hrs in a&e there is almost always a motorbike rider with potentially serious injuries. Far fewer horse riders - could be location I suppose.
I would definitely ride a motorbike again but I would prefer my adult dc to have horse riding lessons than ride a motorbike.
Working in the stables and caring for a large, intelligent animal brings many rewards.

All activities are dangerous! I'm 71 and have been riding since I was 4. Yes, I've had a few tumbles over the years, but I'm still here, still owning and riding my own horse and still enjoying it. Your worst fear should be that she will get addicted and you'll be horse parents forever!!

Just make sure you get fitted with a good hat!