To miss the first lockdown?

[TidyOchreReader]

I know it was a tough time for many but I genuinely loved that first lockdown. I think about it all the time. There was something strangely blissful about slowing down, having fewer obligations and just focusing on connecting with people - even though we couldn’t physically see them. And when you did see someone, the gratitude was immense. AIBU to feel nostalgic for that time?

I get you OP.

You are reflecting on your own experience. Then getting berated for focusing only on yourself…by people who are also doing exactly that.

FWIW, it suited our little family brilliantly.

With respect OP you are talking shit. Lockdown covid was awful. People reacted and coped differently. No part of it I miss not one bit. You post smacks of wanting reactions. Why stir up emotions a lot of people want to forget.

Of course I was concerned about what was happening - the loss and uncertainty were awful. I didn’t mean to minimise that. I was just reflecting on how the enforced pause shifted things for me personally and how it made me reassess pace and connection. It’s possible to feel both grief and a kind of clarity during the same time.

You clearly weren’t trying to hold down a full time job whilst homeschooling two kids.

Thank you for this comment, it has really hit home for me. I am one who answered with defensiveness. And you have helped me understand why. Because thinking about that time gives me the absolute rage. And I realise now it's because I was so very fucking terrified. Every single day.,Going to work everyday in the hospital, the complete unknown, the number of health care workers dying at the beginning.

Someone else made a very insightful post also, that those who loved it, missed it, found it "blissfull" were able to do so because of those of us who were living in absolute terror a lot of the time.

I found the first one felt really different. There was a stillness to it, almost a collective pause. The later ones felt heavier, more drawn out and disconnected for me. I guess I was reflecting on that very first shift in pace more than the rest.

I loved it. I work about 100 hours a week. Lockdown slowed this to about 40. It was heaven to have time to sit, read, walk and take time to rest.

The slower pace of life was grand. I didn't have to people which was great.

ABSOLUTELY NOT! Locking down has caused so many societal issues that its changed the psyche of the country completely.

To think that the British people allowed themselves to be told to stay indoors by Government idiots who laughed at us and partied, just infuriates me.

Even Bojo said retrospectively that he couldn't believe how compliant members of the public became.

For me, the first lockdown came 1 week after having DD so having us all at home was different but positive - we all muddled along and had fun bonding. As a result of it long ter., DH now works from home 4 days a week, having children at home unwell whilst working is now more acceptable than ever, and in general both mine and DH's work/life balance is soooo much better. Yes it had its negatives too - postnatal support was non existent for one. BUT so many positives for our family came out of it long term, that despite the worry at the time, I wouldn't change it ever

It was a complete shit show. I had two kids working in hospitality during the eat out to help out fiasco. Two other children doing gcse and a levels. I was working full time in a supermarket. But that's my experience I'm sure it was lovely for some.

Goodness me. People have different experiences. It wasn't awful for me, it was fantastic. I couldn't care less what anyone thinks of me for feeling that. I loved every moment.

I turned to drink. I hated it.

I completely agree, it was such a dark time and painful time globally and that definitely coloured the whole experience. I’d never wish to return to that context.

I suppose I was trying to describe the quieter feeling of that time… the slowness, the deeper conversations, the space to reset. Like you, I’ve been thinking about how to carry more of that simplicity forward without needing a global crisis to make it happen. It’s definitely something I’m still figuring out.

Jesus what a load of navel gazing bullshit. Read the room. People died.

Well I worked in financial I saw the raw emotion of people being furloughed scared of the impact on not being able to provide for families not being able to pay mortgages running up debts whilst I saw my neighbours elderly people dying without being able to comfort whilst being a key worker and having to home school. My goodness you clearly don’t emphasise with others in your perfect lockdown bubble.

I think you are getting an unnecessarily hard time here OP. I agree with you.

I worked in the NHS, not medical or nursing, and I worked but my job changed as we were redeployed to do critical things. I was swapped from 9-5 Monday to Friday to 3, 12 hour days. I had 4 days a week at home, with my DH who was self employed but couldn't work (builder) and my DD3 who couldn't go to nursery. I enjoyed feeling like I was doing something to help the hideous situation and doing something that mattered. My DHs relationship with DD improved immensely as they had those 3 days a week together which was much more than usual, and we all got to spend more time together as a family.

We were incredibly lucky, we didn't lose anyone personally and we were able to return to normality without much issue. We know other people, most other people, weren't that lucky - but that doesn't mean that we didn't get a lot of positives from it.

When did we all become so hideous to each other? Just because someone's experience of a poor time generally for many was different doesn't make it wrong!!

I sort of see what you mean but you are probably looking at it through rose tinted glasses. It was a scary time even if you didn’t lose anyone close to you as we were going into the unknown. Not knowing when the kids would return to school, how much their education would be impacted, how much our careers would be impacted, whether we’d ever be able to travel again etc. Very scary.

But the world slowing down was lovely. Not rushing around all the time, no commuting, no work stress, more time with my children, more time in my home, more time with my DH.

That was all lovely and made me realise what my life was lacking. So I quit my job, found a much nicer job where I work from home full time and have been fully present for my family ever since then.

I think if you are longing for lockdown again then you need to make some changes to your life now.

Like loads of my friends, I have lockdowns to thank for transforming my work/life balance.

My job was full on and in the office 5 days per week. I manage a large team and we none of us thought we could do the job remotely. Now, my entire team works remotely and we have a completely agile working policy meaning that most of them work when it suits them.

We get together for face to face meetings and training sessions but that’s it. It has really given us all balance and I now enjoy a job that used to tire me out.

I loved it too

People die all the time. Should we all stop enjoying every moment because someone, somewhere has died?

Are you still working, spending time with loved ones, laughing, loving despite the thousands who have died in Ukraine?

Enjoying your own life experience and empathizing with others who are suffering are not mutually exclusive.

I was glad to work from home, I enjoyed the local walks.

I am able to see the few positive things. Unlike the over 20,000 people who are not alive to look back at that time because of the belated actions or inactions of the worst Prime Minister ever. If I believed in the death penalty I would wish him to hang.

Well yes some lucky people did enjoy it but it was absolutely disastrous and deadly for many.

I agree entirely with this.
At a personal level it was bliss. But didn't forget my privileged position WFH with my DH also WFH. I am very well aware of self employed people and small business let alone clinical staff take on it.
What I think we miss was to be able to lead a simple life.
Not the crazy birthday parties, no multiple sports and clubs. No commute. No office days where you are utterly wrecked.
The highlight was to go for a walk nearby. Cooking a nice meal. The person you crossed paths with and say hi. The friendships were suddenly so important and valued. My DC had a great experience too and now in their early teens miss it too, same us DH and me.
I'm very sorry to hear all the bad experiences and how much some kids were affected by it.
I'm very sorry it was so different to all of us 💐

I might have respected the need for lockdown if the government wasn’t gaslighting us at every turn, deliberately muddling deaths “with Covid” and “of Covid”, and if they JUST ONCE fucking apologised for the damage their protracted lockdowns were causing, instead of Saint Boris’s grovel at “100,000 deaths”. And apologised for the destruction of businesses, and the self-employed who were plunged into poverty overnight by billionaire Sunak.

I worked for an education supply agency at the time.

We had upwards of 200 people working for us, all unemployed overnight when the schools closed in March 2020. Supply teachers don’t get paid when they’re not working, and they’re not usually self employed either. I vividly remember staying at work until the last one had been spoken to, even if it was just to listen to their panic. Furlough wasn’t a thing at first, and some of them didn’t qualify when it was.

I do remember how absolutely awful that was, and absolutely wasn’t without empathy for the many, many people I employed that were left in real hardship.

But it wasn’t my fault, and it’s not OPs either. We didn’t invent a pandemic. And outside of the shitshow that was my employment at the time, it’s not unreasonable to have enjoyed life slowing down and seeing less of the wider public if actually that’s your preference.