To miss the first lockdown?

[TidyOchreReader]

I know it was a tough time for many but I genuinely loved that first lockdown. I think about it all the time. There was something strangely blissful about slowing down, having fewer obligations and just focusing on connecting with people - even though we couldn’t physically see them. And when you did see someone, the gratitude was immense. AIBU to feel nostalgic for that time?

It did also occur to me, trauma aside, is this division of enjoyment vs hell on earth coming from introverts and extrovert characteristics?

Extroverts would have been miserable as hell, introverts quite happy to be spared! The poll would reflect this I suspect…

No, it was awful for us, DH worked in essential retail. My DM died of covid on her own.
I would have enjoyed it without the above.
I understand that it was life changing for many, good and very bad.
The increase in domestic murder and suicide was horrendous too, normal people lost their minds with fear.

I am solely answering the OP in my response.

Neither YABU or YANBU and why don't you just start doing more of those things that you did enjoy, if it will make you feel better?

You don't have the right to expect or apply your choices or standards to others, however.

It was such a contrast, really truly horrible things happening, the deaths were awful, isolation, no furlough for many, businesses closing, just so many things. But good came out of it too. I like that life slowed down. It feels like a dream/nightmare now, I can’t believe it was real and it feels like it will never happen again.

I said at the time that I loved lockdown. While I recognised the bigger picture was terrible, for me personality it was just what I needed.

Fascinating perspectives from both of you.

I am glad you got to experience greater accessibility, eg theatre and resources, and yes it really is such a shame those positive changes have not been continued to those who needed them before and who still need them.

No. I am an introvert and hated lockdown.
My social batteries were overcharged and leaking acid. I was very lonely.
It was illegal to see and hug my own mum. Why would I like that?

Yes, I’ve noticed the same. It’s like the moment we could go back to “normal”, the pressure to do everything again rushed back in, even stronger. I’m definitely guilty of slipping back into the busy-ness too, even though I remember craving simplicity. I love your idea of collectively slowing down, it really does feel like something we have to be intentional about or it disappears.

I won’t lie – lockdown made my life a lot better. We saved a ton of money. We spent quality time with our children, who were just at the right age to benefit from it. Our jobs were safe and the pressure was off. Our long commutes were over. We are still reaping the benefits today – the money and WFH which allowed us to live where we wanted to.

But is all that worth the atrocities that accumulated because of it? The damage to the economy, the NHS, the livelihoods, the deaths. Absolutely not. If I could go back in time and have it never have happened, I would grit my teeth and would.

Me and DH loved it. Both kept working full time at home, no kids to home-educate, gorgeous walks on our doorstep and a quiet garden to enjoy the lovely weather we had.

It kick-started a change in our lifestyle that we still live life like today. We got a gorgeous dog and now enjoy uk holidays rather than travelling abroad as much, I moved to permanent work from home job etc. So for us it was life changing in the best way.

However I have complete sympathy for anyone who had sick family or lost people close to them, or who lost their jobs or businesses. Or those who had to home-school. It was a completely different, negative experience for many people and I am therefore careful who I share my opinions with about that time!

Yes, I’ve been thinking something similar. I’m more introverted by nature, so I found parts of the slower, quieter rhythm oddly soothing - even though of course the wider context was traumatic and heavy. It makes sense that people experienced it very differently depending on their needs, personality, and circumstances.

Fair enough, I wasn’t trying to impose anything on others, just reflecting on how that time shifted something for me personally. I’m trying to figure out how to bring more of that quiet and focus into my day to day now.

YANBU @TidyOchreReader - I absolutely loved lockdown. 4 months with DH, having DSD week on week off, no commuting, enough remote work to keep me busy, quality time together - it was absolutely fantastic. I’m sorry for those who didn’t enjoy it or who found is hideous but there’s no shame in saying that you didn’t.

I ended up on antidepressants by the time we were coming out of relentless lockdowns (Glasgow - just about everyone got their freedom before us). But I get what you mean. At the start the entire world was united against a common enemy. House Party app and Tik Tok dances. Home schooling just about did me in (ND child, single parent newly separated and working full time) but DS was in P1 and I was strangely glad to have unexpected time home with him. Plus the weather was amazing. It was frightening and weird and we all pulled together. And with the benefi9of hindsight we can erase the terror a lot of us felt either for ourselves or our loved ones, and just feel nostalgic.

It didn’t slow down for me. In fact work got ridiculously crazy trying to identify and support our clients who needed help. We had to wfh without any proper equipment or set up, working significantly longer hours than before. Our fertility treatments got cancelled and we weren’t sure when or whether they would get back up (given our ages too). It was a sh*tshow and we actually had it quite good compared to many others.

Wholeheartedly disagree. It’s a v inappropriate post
People died. The NHS was on its knees
But hey,so long as you had a nice time at a pace that suited you

5 years later and the world has almost forgotten about it. Companies are going back to work from office policies, pubs are busy, sporting events sold out, Royal Ascot is full of drunken chavs pretending to have class, people are going on holiday, the planes are coming in thick and fast at Heathrow.

I’ve only read the OP post and her updates.
Totally agree OP, I loved it. It was a heady, blissful time for me.
Others find it distatateful to hear it, but it’s true nevertheless. I’d go back to that time in a heartbeat.

Edited to add, I worked part time at a funeral home during Covid so wasn’t immune to the horrors, but on a personal level, lockdown was everything.

I’m an introvert and I fucking hated it, sorry.

You can probably go back to that time if you really want to. Without expecting everyone else to aswell.

@TidyOchreReader OP are you me???? I was thinking the exact thing today. Before people come to chew my head off -
i worked in the NHS during COVID
I lost my dad to COVID and couldn’t travel for his funeral which has affected me deeply and I’m on anti depressants
We don’t have any family here and I was petrified that if me or husband got infected as to who would take care of our daughter who was 4

Therefore I’m on no way minimising the physiological and physical effects of COVID. When I’m saying I miss the lockdown it’s not the suffering or loneliness which no one wants again - ever.

what I miss is the slow pace which showed life doesn’t need to be a competition or complicated. There are plenty of simple pleasures- which we fail to see and the lock down forced us to.

i really miss this-

I absolutely adored it. BUT - I was 24, in a well-paid wfh job, and living with my boyfriend. Now I have young kids, and often think about how I'd genuinely lose my mind if I was trapped at home with them for months on end, let alone while working.

50/50 on the AIBU responses. It's heart-breaking to read the stories of those who were badly affected by lockdown, especially those in the NHS or whose elderly parents were in care homes. But OP is not looking through rose-tinted glasses - 50% of us really loved lockdown, and found a special kind of peace and happiness in the enforced slowing down and isolation. Personally, I look back on that period with real affection, despite the awfulness some people experienced.

It was nice for me. But I recognise it was completely horrific for others.

I'm sorry I know someone will point out in a minute that everyone has a right to experience what they experienced etc but I truly hate posts like this. They are the 2020s equivalent of Marie Antoinette playing in her fake village: the epitome of bad taste, lack of judgement and failure to read a room.

Anyone who misses lockdown is, by definition, incredibly privileged. My lockdown was utterly awful, I was working in an airless room for 16 hours a day while my daughter in the room next door came close to a full breakdown. And I was lucky I got to keep my job and didn't have to work in a COVID ward or a supermarket.

I find people with their Elysian memories of romping through forests holding hands with their children and husbands and their self-indulgent maunderings about "slowing down" and "connecting" unbelievably decadent and self-indulgent.

Sorry, you can feel as you feel but please keep it to yourself.