Peri high sex drive - how long did yours last?

[KPPlumbing]

Following from the recent thread asking when your perimenopause symptoms started and when they hit their peak...

For the last year or so, I've been driven crazy with an insanely high libido. I'm 41.

Don't get me wrong, it's a lot of fun, but I'm genuinely concerned I'm going to either lose my job or get arrested at this point!

For others who experienced this when you either hit peri or hit your early 40s, how long did it last? Or did it never end, and if so, how old are you now?

I kind of want it to last forever, but would also like a break from feeling quite so insatiably horny! 🫠

The age range of peri is insane isn't it! You might get impacted at 38 or 58. Nuts!

I hope it lasts forever!!

Been on systemic HRT for nearly 2 years. Battling though local oestrogen which is the only assistance with vaginal atrophy

I did both. Successfully and without incident too 😁

Please tell us more!

Why is it a battle if you dont mind me asking? Does it give you negative side effects?

Yes, everything on the market, I'm still on it at 63. I wanted testosterone but my GP wasn't helpful at all. I may as well be dead from the neck down.

And I'm envious of you! Single over 50 with a sex drive is unpleasant.

I’ve a question for all the women saying they just aren’t interested.
If you were to go along on an occasion and start with foreplay, do you get in the mood? Is it just the initial start?

Did you try any private clinics or buying it online? I know the expense can be prohibitive.

When I was in my 40's we had children at home, a restaurant & 3 takeaways.

DH was still playing rugby, doing triathlons etc as well as managing the business. Life was pretty hectic with family activities, businesses etc.

Not to mention DH's tendency to 'praise the Lord' when he was coming was a bit of a concern, even if I put my hand over his mouth as I was afraid the DCs would hear us.

Frankly, I was so knackered in the mornings & thinking about everything that I had to do to get the day started & then in the evenings so knackered having done everything that needed to be done. I kind of considered sex as just another job that I had to do.

But now - WOW! We have re-discovered it & it's such fun!

Varies

Sometimes we talk about what we'd like to do & that turns us on.

Mostly it's spontaneous. for eg: DH stripped off in the living room announcing that he was hot & needed a shower. My reaction was 'Phhorr gorgeous body there, you still have it' - his 'all your baby' so I joined him in the shower - the rest (as the late great Ian Jury would put it) was very naughty and also very rude.😉

We also sometimes just spontaneously start kissing & things go from there. We also will plan it we will say 'this afternoon let's have a lie down, no pressure' sometimes we fall asleep sometimes we make the world rock.

About 3-4 years superhigh, now still relatively high, but more high end of normal ( for me) not off the charts. DH is, I think, relieved.

Also some anti-depressants can affect you libido & ability to orgasm. My GP moved me onto Seroxat. My libido dropped to zero & I found that I was unable to orgasm. DH did some googling & found that it was probably my meds. I discussed with GP (who was surprised that I was still sexually active - I soon put him right!) changed my prescription - a few week later - game on 😜

I've also found that DH's Viagra works for me. Makes up horny & I come like a train & so easily - but it's not recommended for women

edited for typos

Wow it's brilliant how much you've managed as a couple through your time together, and are still enjoying an active sex life. Enjoy!

Ooh DH has some (not medically needed, just for extra fun) and I'm so tempted to try it!

It’s certainly what’s happened to me in the last year (I’m 44 now) but it took me completely by surprise! None of my friends have (yet) experienced this so I felt like such a weirdo. Really relieved by this thread tbh!

This made me laugh. He's not my type but I’d love him to come round, I bet he’s great at DIY (or at any rate better than my husband who is my type and sadly not at all great at DIY!)

It's bizarre isn't it. It was literally an overnight switch for me!
It's reassuring to know there are so many of us in the same boat.

YUP - freaking brilliant!! Having the best sex ever! No kids to interrupt us, no concerns about getting pregnant, totally free to explore our fantasise. Loving it. Even better than when we were in our 20's before children as we know each other so well & able how our bodies work what turns us on etc.

I so love my DH & still totally fancy the freaking pants off him. 😍

Omg, how did I not know that was a thing? I’m peri but not had that yet… the opposite in fact. fingers crossed it will kick in sometime before it’s gone for good!! 😂😂

Just a warning to post menopausal women about vaginal atrophy - it's a thing! Your vagina literally atrophies eg: the virginal wall thins & sex can become painful.

While I was pre- menopausal, we still had DS5 at home, I was stressed in my job, we were selling the businesses, I was caring for my parents as well as regular visits to my MIL in a care home. All combined to the point where we hadn't had sex for several years. I was just too exhausted & didn't want the bother. DH understood.

DS left home, parents & MIL died.

After about 6 years without any sex we finally we got down to it - OMG! it was so painful!! I could hardly walk for days. I went to see doctor. My first visit was to a male GP who diagnosed thrush - I knew that wasn't the problem but went along with it. Sex was so painful that I wasn't interested & DH was so worried that it was painful for me that he didn't want to try it.

Then I went back & saw a female GP who diagnosed virginal atrophy. Yes, it's case of use it or lose it. She explained & prescribed little HRT pills that you stick up your fanny twice a week that solve this problems.

After about a month/6 weeks on this it was feeling well up for it & haven't looked back😜

Dont worry, none of us knew it was a thing! It's a never-spoken-about symptom!

I'm 50, been in peri 4 years, no HRT yet (not in UK, we're very far behind here). Since March, I've been OFF THE WALLS HORNY! And yes, it's like a switch has been flipped. 3+ times a week, although I'd prefer 3 x day every day!! Luckily DH is delighted and it takes him a long time to come, I had 3 orgasms in 2 hours last week <woof woof>

As pp, I've got no inhibitions, fantasies are coming out thick and fast. It's fucking wonderful, pun totally intended.

Tbh, it's so strong that I've been writing smut, just in a notebook, not for publication, starring various famous hot men.

I'm aware of vaginal atrophy as my best friend has it, poor woman, it's horrible. But so far nothing for me, quite the opposite.

I had a very dry spell due to birth trauma with ds2. I've recently lost weight and think that might've eased up some pressure (horrific forceps scarring) and I've turned into Samantha Jones - yippee! Long may it last.