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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think some teachers are getting away with all sorts with no way of challenging them??

303 replies

RedEyePen · 18/06/2025 17:58

Mainly SLT! So today my ‘high needs’ son who the school tried to off roll had a head bump. On the way back from A and E I bumped into the Head getting her weekly shop in the supermarket. During school time. She didn’t seem stressed at all! Just getting her shopping in. V happy to interrogate my son as to why he wasn’t in school. Head and non teaching SENCO are always in the playground chatting every morning, yet can’t do any of my son’s paperwork without - at worst - an 8 months delay because they are ‘snowed under’.
I also work in a school where planning meetings, courses, computer based admin trumps : actually attending to the children’s needs.
AIBU??

OP posts:
SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 19/06/2025 12:20

@RedEyePen - I agree with @RhaenysRocks - I would like to know why you think the Head teacher not allowed a lunch break (even if she doesn’t take it at lunch time), and why it is wrong for her to do some non-school-related activity (ie. shopping) during that lunch break.

blackbird77 · 19/06/2025 12:43

This is the headteacher of a school, a professional woman making six figures, experienced and a leader in both her industry and her institution in charge of multi-million pound budgets and managing several hundred staff and students. Not only is she allowed to leave the premises of her school when she requires, I assume as part of her job anyway that she will frequently be off-site regularly (leaving other senior members of leadership responsible). Headteachers regularly have to have meeting outside school, working lunches, visit locations, pick up or shop for supplies for staff and students etc.

It might have also been her lunch break but even if it wasn't, it's completely LEGAL for teachers to take their PPA hours off the school premises for whatever purpose they wish if that's the school set-up and the school allows it. Our school is moving to this model in a couple of years time. Lots of schools allow this already. It's in normal contracts.

You do realise that headteachers are frequently in school until 9,10pm for open evenings, meetings with parents, police, parents evening, professional meetings etc. I'd expect someone that high up running any company to make their own decisions about how best to use their time.

blackbird77 · 19/06/2025 12:56

"Just to answer a few points!
I’m not allowed to clean up poo, as I work with food in my role. I’m expressly told to report all faults to a maintenance team, yet I was shouted at for doing this by a member of SLT. She said I should have told her first. So now I do and the faults are not addressed. I don’t have a hammer to fix nails and I doubt I’d be allowed to use it.
The general theme on the other threat is that the child may have been excluded unfairly. My DS is extremely quiet and not disruptive, but they wanted to off roll due to funding or concerns about results.
“Off-rolling’ is described by Ofsted as the practice of a school removing a pupil from a school roll in the perceived interests of the school rather than the pupil.
‘Gaming’ is similar and describes any process when a school’s actions or decisions – to exclude, not to exclude or during the process of excluding a pupil - are made in order to favour the school or academic league tables.
Any such exclusion is unlawful where a school removes a pupil from the Admissions Register for any reason not set out in Regulation 8 of The Education (Pupil Registration) (England) Regulations 2006.”
So I think my ‘chip’ is more that I’ve seen a member of SLT browsing a supermarket (twice) buying her ‘chips’ - and not looking ‘stretched’ - while hearing that the school are too stretched to support my child. And two others : one excluded in reception, and one in Year1.
Exclusion rates are at an all time high."

Exclusion rates needs to be 10x higher. Everyone is sick of it. Look at what's happened in Scotland with their failed no exclusion policy and how much violence is going on up there. A haadteacher needs to have the ability to exclude otherwise teachers and students cannot be kept safe and students cannot learn. 90% of the problems in the public school system are due to schools not being allowed to exclude. Every day I see the faces of kids who are forced to be in an environment with students who are violent, aggressive continually disrupt lessons and abuse staff, all because schools are threatened with eye-watering penalties financially and reputationally for having the gall to want to keep their students and staff happy and safe.

JimmyGrimble · 19/06/2025 14:42

You’re making quite the leap there OP
As none of know the details of your son’s needs it’s impossible for any of us to judge whether this head is acting in their best interests or not. Sometimes though, mainstream is just not suitable for a child even if parents find this hard to accept. You clearly don’t agree with her assessment of your child’s need. What I will say is that often, how children are at home, with routine and familiarity is different to how they cope in a mainstream classroom with one or two adults and 30 other children. How is your child presenting at school and why do you doubt their assessment of his need?
I really think that the trust has gone in your relationship and you need to move your child.

gattocattivo · 19/06/2025 19:42

There’s an awful lot of giveaways in the OP that she’s really just resentful and wanting to have a teacher bash without much substance.

the OP claims she works in a school, but funnily enough happens to be around in the morning to see the head and SENCO chatting in the playground. I wonder if other people look at her, wondering why the hell she’s doing the school run rather than being in work herself! No doubt the staff are on playground duty anyway … I imagine most teachers don’t hang around in the playground by choice.

and why the mention of ‘non teaching’ SENCO? yes, some SENCO’s may not have teaching as part of their regular duties, but the OP doesn’t seem to realise that a SENCO has to be a qualified teacher. It’s one of the few roles in a state school where it’s mandatory.

if it’s true the OP works in a school then I’d put money on her being a frustrated and resentful LSA, sniping about other staff who are better qualified, earn more, work far longer hours and carry a shed load of responsibility.

And that is not a pop at LSA’s in general who imo are drastically underpaid for the important job they do. But in the case of the OP there just seems to be so much unfounded resentment at teachers.

pancakestastelikecrepe · 19/06/2025 20:43

JimmyGrimble · 18/06/2025 19:52

Oh I see you were a teacher? Why aren’t you a teacher any more?

I think we all know @RedEyePen is not, nor ever has been, a teacher

ChaiLarious · 19/06/2025 20:58

gattocattivo · 19/06/2025 19:42

There’s an awful lot of giveaways in the OP that she’s really just resentful and wanting to have a teacher bash without much substance.

the OP claims she works in a school, but funnily enough happens to be around in the morning to see the head and SENCO chatting in the playground. I wonder if other people look at her, wondering why the hell she’s doing the school run rather than being in work herself! No doubt the staff are on playground duty anyway … I imagine most teachers don’t hang around in the playground by choice.

and why the mention of ‘non teaching’ SENCO? yes, some SENCO’s may not have teaching as part of their regular duties, but the OP doesn’t seem to realise that a SENCO has to be a qualified teacher. It’s one of the few roles in a state school where it’s mandatory.

if it’s true the OP works in a school then I’d put money on her being a frustrated and resentful LSA, sniping about other staff who are better qualified, earn more, work far longer hours and carry a shed load of responsibility.

And that is not a pop at LSA’s in general who imo are drastically underpaid for the important job they do. But in the case of the OP there just seems to be so much unfounded resentment at teachers.

They mentioned they work with food so I don't think she's even an LSA, I'd say catering staff tbh.

gattocattivo · 20/06/2025 08:17

The OP says she’s got a teaching degree. What does that even mean? You can do an online ‘education degree’ through the open university without even needing any formal entry qualifications!!

if the OP actually has qualified teacher status (which is not the same as some sort of woolly ‘education degree’ then why the hell isn’t she actually doing the job? She says she works part time in a school earning a fraction of what the teaching and leadership staff earn.

Either the whole thing is a load of bollocks or she just couldn’t cut it as a teacher.

Petitchat · 20/06/2025 14:33

Swiftie1878 · 19/06/2025 08:36

Your resentment is palpable. This won’t help your child.

Ask for a meeting with the Head and Chair of Governors. Approach the meeting in a conciliatory manner - what can be done to get things put in place, speed things up? What timescale is reasonable? What can YOU do to support the school’s efforts?
Keep your cool. Watch your tone and the language you use. Don’t accuse anyone of anything; just ask questions about the things you have observed and don’t understand, or that don’t fit with the school’s narrative. DON’T mention shopping trips - you really have no idea about those, and mentioning them will make you appear nasty.

Good luck!

In other words, stay under the thumb.

Ffs.....

Petitchat · 20/06/2025 14:53

ouch321 · 19/06/2025 09:08

What is it you object to?

  1. That the Head is entitled to a lunch break?
  1. That she was taking a lunch break outside the traditional time of 1pm to 2pm?
  1. Or that she was using said break to do something different than eating lunch?

Or all of the above?

You sound like a nightmare parent.

No.

To me she sounds like a frustrated, upset, and annoyed with the system, parent.

Many parents feel like this nowadays and permanent exclusions certainly don't help, especially the child...

Swiftie1878 · 20/06/2025 14:57

Petitchat · 20/06/2025 14:33

In other words, stay under the thumb.

Ffs.....

In other words, make progress.

LatteLady · 20/06/2025 15:01

I have set a day off site, as part of a HT Performance Management and I have also had other HTs working 80% of the time. And yes, I have had HTs and members of staff picking up stuff from the supermarket for school during the school day.

I think you might be somewhat surprised by the amount of time HTs spend outside of school attending meetings, surprisingly as a Chair of Governors for 30+ years I have never felt the need to chain an HT to their office.

gingerelephant · 20/06/2025 15:05

The points made are unrelated. How the school staff day is structured and if time is flexible is a matter for the school, whether the HT or indeed any teacher has children is their business alone - these are irrelevant to any issues a parent may have with their children’s treatment.

Itallcomesdowntothis · 20/06/2025 16:00

gattocattivo · 19/06/2025 19:42

There’s an awful lot of giveaways in the OP that she’s really just resentful and wanting to have a teacher bash without much substance.

the OP claims she works in a school, but funnily enough happens to be around in the morning to see the head and SENCO chatting in the playground. I wonder if other people look at her, wondering why the hell she’s doing the school run rather than being in work herself! No doubt the staff are on playground duty anyway … I imagine most teachers don’t hang around in the playground by choice.

and why the mention of ‘non teaching’ SENCO? yes, some SENCO’s may not have teaching as part of their regular duties, but the OP doesn’t seem to realise that a SENCO has to be a qualified teacher. It’s one of the few roles in a state school where it’s mandatory.

if it’s true the OP works in a school then I’d put money on her being a frustrated and resentful LSA, sniping about other staff who are better qualified, earn more, work far longer hours and carry a shed load of responsibility.

And that is not a pop at LSA’s in general who imo are drastically underpaid for the important job they do. But in the case of the OP there just seems to be so much unfounded resentment at teachers.

And she deals with food. I am going with dinner lady. Or lunchtime lady.

i think working in a school as one of those (both important jobs and not putting them down) and being the head are pretty different. Stating the difference only.

It’s like comparing a consultant in a hospital to someone who works at the coffee shop. Or a premier league manager to an usher- they are both there but they won’t know the ins and outs or each others role.

LovePoppy · 20/06/2025 17:37

How dare a woman not look stressed and harried

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 20/06/2025 17:57

No reply from @RedEyePen to the questions I asked yesterday - why does she think the HT isn’t entitled to a lunch break (even if she doesn’t take it at lunch time), and why it is unacceptable for the HT to go shopping, or do any other non-teaching-related activity during said lunch break?

Colour me surprised.

TheTwirlyPoos · 20/06/2025 21:22

Yeah I wouldn't hold your breath.

I suspect it will be silence or something like 'oh yes and the HT killed my dog by running it over'

wellington77 · 20/06/2025 21:27

Teachers are allowed in many schools to leave site during planning and preparation allotted hours (PPA) some schools let staff go home. So that could be it

hazelowens · 20/06/2025 21:36

My ex brother in law is a teacher and he started his day at 7am to be there and getting his classroom set up for the day, there was days he wouldn't be home till 6 and if he was home he was doing marking and planning for the following day, week, month or term. Teachers don't work 9-3 and when he became a deputy headmaster I knew his hours got longer so if he did his shopping during the day he was probably on his lunch and rushing about.

Kebab85 · 27/06/2025 18:15

How do you know she wasn't shopping for cooking ingredients for the children to use?

pancakestastelikecrepe · 27/06/2025 21:43

Sorry should have added, if it's not a virus/bug, mitigated by your reference to Calpol doing the job, I presume he's really ill. But not so ill, you're posting for opinions on whether you should harass the school? 🙄
Hope he's better, tomorrow, genuinely

RedEyePen · 02/07/2025 07:56

Just thought I’d come back and say - 2pm yesterday, my DC’s class teacher plus a lady I don’t know but also looked like a teacher were having a leisurely browse yesterday. Same shop! Looked guilty when she saw me but we had a quick chat. Was then next to me on the scanner sighing to her friend saying ‘better get back to my laptop’!

OP posts:
TheTwirlyPoos · 02/07/2025 08:01

You're the gift that keeps giving.

gattocattivo · 02/07/2025 08:15

‘a lady I don’t know but also looked like a teacher’

crying 😂😂😂😂😂

gattocattivo · 02/07/2025 08:18

Note the OP is in the supermarket at 2 pm, lazy cow