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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

22 kids and counting...

72 replies

LookingAtMyBhunas · 18/06/2025 17:31

AIBU to think they're not actually great parents?

I'm watching an older series and they've just been told by one of the siblings that some of the younger ones are carrying knives. Cue a very half hearted 'Oh nooo that's not ideal is it' and a weak chat with one of them.

This is just one example. I'm not going to comment on him being 17 and her 13 when she got pregnant with their first.... 😬

OP posts:
Mademetoxic · 19/06/2025 21:18

knor · 19/06/2025 21:13

I have watched a few eps here and there. The children do always seem well cared for and they say they don’t claim any benefits (outside child benefit.)

I do have a few problems though.

  1. the young age she got pregnant with her first
  2. often the older kids are looking after the younger kids which I don’t agree with. I think children should be children
  3. can they really have enough time for each child?

They exploit their children for money.

itsgettingweird · 19/06/2025 21:20

LookingAtMyBhunas · 18/06/2025 17:36

Apologies I didn't report to the MN Police force before posting. Are you a full time constable or a Special?

Show quote history

😂😂😂

leopardprint17 · 19/06/2025 22:01

MugsyBalonz · 19/06/2025 19:48

As they're being filmed for television, I would imagine it goes under child performer rules and they'd be granted leave from school as part of their child performance license(s). School would only be able to object to a license application if they can evidence that the child's education would suffer, e.g., proof of falling behind, however the production team could easily circumvent that by springing for a tutor for the duration of filming.

Show quote history

If they are child performers, does that entitle them to be paid? Thats a lot of wages!

ThistleTits · 19/06/2025 22:39

@knor I believe they get disability benefits and carers allowance for some of the children.

Dawnb19 · 19/06/2025 23:02

Unfortunately you'll probably get your head bit off for saying this. They have quite a lot of fans that are ok with the age gap when she got pregnant. I also hate the fact their older kids have to help bring up their siblings as the parents aren't able to look after that many kids without their help.

TooSquaretobehip · 20/06/2025 07:50

Magixx · 19/06/2025 19:10

I have a bit of issue with the fact that when they first started appearing on tv it was a reality tv style 'look into the life of a large family' etc and now their series are them holidaying in America, Disneyworld etc etc which is completely unattainable for any other family with that many children and also begs the question how they get away with having them out of school so much when any other family gets fined for doing so.

They're homeschooled I presume. A family that big wouldn't be attending a physical school.

TooSquaretobehip · 20/06/2025 07:51

Wait.... we are talking about the Duggars here, aren't we?

ExtraOnions · 20/06/2025 07:54

…some sort of bizzare pregnancy fetish … not sure why anyone thinks it’s admirable.

LeaAndDer · 20/06/2025 07:57

Both parents must have mental health issues to keep on producing kids like they’re going out of fashion.

InNewYorkNoShoes · 20/06/2025 07:59

Anything posted about them gets deleted. They can obviously also afford good solicitors as well as Disney holidays.

Flashahah · 20/06/2025 08:01

Mumof1andacat · 18/06/2025 17:34

A post like this about this family comes up every so often. If you don't like them, don't watch or follow them.

The irony of someone opening a post to moan about its content.

I think they’re a disgrace and have made themselves a freak show,

Natureearthlove · 20/06/2025 08:04

Can’t stand them and don’t understand how folk can think they are so wonderful Confused

Dividing your attention between 22 kids is impossible, certainly no 1 to 1 time for them.
The older siblings were live in babysitters for the to younger kids.

I think she just enjoyed being pregnant and became addicted to it, which I believe is selfish.

She could have became a surrogate or if it was just a case she wanted a big family, she could have fostered - that’s my honest opinion.

purpleme12 · 20/06/2025 08:06

TooSquaretobehip · 20/06/2025 07:51

Wait.... we are talking about the Duggars here, aren't we?

No, the Radfords
And no they're not homeschooled
They go to school

Teaandtoastserveddaily · 20/06/2025 08:11

The dad Noel always strikes me as very thick, creepy and generally just not equipped to parent.

The kids are running feral. Later episodes of their shows are contrived and silly e.g moving to florida???!

I feel sorry for the kids especially the older ones.

Not to mention the age gap 🤢

Plus there's something weird about how the kids look. Almost like Sue and Noel are related.

Pollyanna87 · 20/06/2025 08:31

The dad shouldn’t be around children at all, considering.

LivingOnTheVeg · 20/06/2025 09:00

defrazzled · 19/06/2025 18:39

The mother was a care experienced child when she first got pregnant, the whole situation is sad tbh.

Neither of them were in care; they were both adopted at birth. I’d hazard a guess being
given up by their birth parents is the root of most of their issues but it’s not the sad story that some people like to wheel out of “oh they both grew up in care and it’s lovely they’ve started a family and stayed together” etc. Ultimately it’s the story of a 17-year-old getting a 13-year-old pregnant and getting praised on TV for it.

LadyKenya · 20/06/2025 09:07

ThistleTits · 19/06/2025 22:39

@knor I believe they get disability benefits and carers allowance for some of the children.

No different to lots of other families then, where they have been deemed eligible.

Mumof3bringwine · 20/06/2025 09:38

My issue is that these kids seemed to have wired their whole life, they have been the “stars “ of the show yet at least 2 has to apply for social housing. Why their parents afford Mutiple holidays a year to Florida etc
where is their money ?

ThistleTits · 20/06/2025 09:44

I'm not criticising, just a reply. They're entitled to it, just like David Cameron's family was.

bluecurtains14 · 20/06/2025 09:58

AIBU to think they're not actually great parents?

Surely @LookingAtMyBhunas the unreasonable thing would have to ever thought that two people, one of whom impregnated a 13 year old, could ever be good parents to that many kids?

Cookiecats · 20/06/2025 14:42

I have a 17 year old… if I even thought he was sniffing around 13 years old in that way then I would be disgusted 🤮 we’ve basically glamorised something very gross.

They must have some sort of strange pregnancy fetish. Creepy .

Rhaenys · 20/06/2025 20:25

The fact that they’ve had 22 kids makes them bad parents by default.

Natureearthlove · 20/06/2025 20:52

Rhaenys · 20/06/2025 20:25

The fact that they’ve had 22 kids makes them bad parents by default.

Totally agree!

goudacheese · 20/06/2025 20:59

Something a bit odd about Sue, not quite the ticket. They are always off to Disneyworld too, which again is weird, a bit like the creepy American family who locked up their 15 kids.

Rhaenys · 20/06/2025 21:03

Natureearthlove · 20/06/2025 20:52

Totally agree!

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It’s just absolutely insane. It always pisses me off when people try to justify it as being okay because they’re not on benefits, as if money is all it takes to raise a child. Even if they had a quarter of the amount of kids, it’d still be too many.