Driveway wars - awkward petty neighbour

[Tarytino]

We live on a shared drive way (shared with 3 houses). We’re in the middle. Yesterday we had a friend over and I told him to park just outside of our house (on the shared driveway) as house 3 was out. An hour or so later house 3 arrives home - instead of simply asking him to move the car they sat there honking on the horn. It’s a short driveway, they could have parked at the end and walked down to their house (plenty of parking on street at end of driveway) but no. Friend went out and moved his car - no thanks, no acknowledgment. Once they had got passed friend moved his car back where it was.

10 mins later - horn honking outside. House 3 had decided to go out again. Friend goes out to move car. 20 minutes later more honking outside. I went out and approached neighbour asking why she is honking her horn rather than using her words. She said “I need to get to my house and there is a car in the way” 🙄 I said “yes, but you don’t need to honk the horn, just knock”. She said “can’t be arsed getting in and out of car”. I left her to it and friend moved car. Needless to say, 20 mins later, more honking outside.

now it was very obvious that neighbour was deliberately going in and out of driveway to make some kind of point. So we played her game and this went on for about 2 hours before she eventually got bored.

Today, we are having gravel delivered and they will be parking on the shared driveway. Normally I’d warn neighbour to let her know to get her car out of driveway so she doesn’t get stuck but because of yesterdays performance - I’m not going to bother. This isn’t the first time we have had issues with this neighbour btw. AIBU to let her get her car stuck? Chances are she won’t be going out anyway but no doubt as soon as she sees someone parked there she’ll suddenly develop an urgent need to go out 🙄

It means You are the A**hole (and she is)

I don’t understand how you don’t understand how unreasonable you are.

We have a ‘shared drive’ with our next door neighbour. The ‘shared’ bit is actually the road at the front of their house, which when you pass their house is no longer shared and is ours. We can comfortably park 6 cars and could squeeze 8 onto our private drive. On the ‘shared drive’ you could (just) park and we would still have access to our house as long as they parked right over to the side.

They moved in a couple of weeks before us so had been parking (or guests, tradespeople etc) on the shared access. We pulled up one day (hadn’t actually completed, and were just nosing at the new house) and they dashed out to apologise for parking there, and said it wouldn’t happen again.

We laughed and said we absolutely couldn’t care less if they do - and that if they ever had a large gathering just to let us know if they wanted to park some cars on our drive (they never have but would be more than welcome to).

Nobody has ever parked there since. Because they understand that it’s not for parking on so they….just….don’t park on it. I didn’t have to tell them not to. They just….don’t…park…on…it.

I really don’t understand how you don’t understand this. It’s irrelevant how many parking spaces they have, you can’t block shared access!

Why not just try to be good neighbours? My husband waters the grass and cuts the front lawn of ours because he’s doing ours anyway so why not? They take our bins out when we forget (which happens more often than I like to admit!), and we take parcels in for each other. I thoroughly enjoy living next door to them - we don’t see each other from one week to the next but we do neighbourly things for each other regularly. By contrast our last neighbour was awful, so petty and awkward. Surely you’d rather not live with this passive aggressive nonsense and just try to be considerate neighbours?

I'm sorry but tbh you are in the wrong here.
My house & 2 others share a driveway, the rule here is you can only park to load & unload. No one here disrespects the rules by blocking the drive. Access is there at all times. We also have a rule of shutting the gates on departures and arrivals.

I do think you and the neighbour need to be communicating better and having certain rules in place to be followed.

You are absolutely being the unreasonable one. Why should your neighbour have to go and knock on just to be able to get to her own house?! I would never ask someone to park on a shared driveway knowing that it would block someone’s way to their home. You must be a nightmare to live next to as you were asking your friend to park there repeatedly to prove what point exactly? That your friend has more right to be there than those who actually live there?
Next time ask your friend to park at the end of the shared driveway and walk rather than expecting your neighbours too!! Can’t actually believe you think that is ok.

Why did your friend keep moving the car back? You stated that there is plenty of parking on road so they should park on road so your neighbour can park on their drive

Sorry OP. I was all ready to be on your side as usually the neighbours are wrong but it’s definitely you. Your friend kept blocking her own driveway and it IS annoying to keep knocking for own driveway.
id apologise to your neighbour and don’t do it again

They were out so you decided you were entitled to their space ? Why not just go take a dump in their toilet. Or nap on their couch. Only exception is if you have asked to use the space or if you know they are on holiday and not due back. Why did your friend not park on the street…

You are both equally as annoying

I massively regret buying my otherwise lovely house because of shared driveway issues. I would never make the same mistake again but I am where I am.

On the day I got my keys I excitedly drove round with my parents to find the neighbour working on a car in my parking spaces with vans parked all over the shared drive.

It's gone on from there and ground me down to the point I don't own a car.

I did get solicitors advice about it and there are restrictive covenants on the entire estate from when the land was originally sold that forbid what they are doing - but I would probably have to get a court injunction, which would be ridiculously expensive.

I would never make the same mistake again.

Why should they have to waste their time getting out of their car to ask you to move?

You are the problem and the type of neighbours I hate.

And to think you had the cheek to post this.

Just invite her round for a glass of wine and agree how to mutually behave.

If there’s so much spare on street parking why didn’t you just ask your friend to use one of those spaces instead of blocking your neighbours access???

Whinging about DH cleaning his car on a Sunday morning (not early, about 8am).

This bit makes me think it's a reverse. Nobody is that lacking in self awareness, surely?

I think you need to put yourself in your neighbours shoes to understand where her frustration is coming from. Imagine coming home to find your drive is blocked by a visitor at a neighbours house.

I have a similar problem with my driveway half of my garden is grass and the other is the drive. I have a wall at the end of the garden and a gap in the wall for my driveway.

Recently my neighbour has been having work done to his house and the tradesmen park in front of my wall but often overhang so that I cannot get into the driveway or get off the driveway as I can’t see oncoming traffic over the van.

In some instances there’s been two vans and one is parked across my driveway access which is highly frustrating as I cannot leave or enter my driveway without knocking on the neighbours door to ask them to move.

Very rude and inconsiderate and I know if it was the other way around he wouldn’t be happy. Treat others how you wish to be treated. Be considerate and respectful… it’s not difficult.

I am afraid to say that you are the awkward one?

No you can’t take the shared car space next to yours when you see it is free. Yes your neighbor is a bit of an ass to just honk but she hoped you’d get it but instead of saying to your friend to park elsewhere you blocked her in again??

ok. She could just park elsewhere. Why did your friend didn’t? It isn’t college doorm…it is a shared parking space. She should be able to share it nicely with you not meaning you can take it as it pleases you but that you will not obstruct her coming in and out at any given time.

So you even contemplate parking on the other neighbour’s drive as well sometimes?? Your sense of entitlement is off the scale here. Maybe you should consider moving, your neighbours must hate you…I would. YABU

If you are a bit of an ass, I will honk twice.
if you are kinda of a real ass, I will honk three times
If you really piss me off, I will keep honking and honking.

😂😂

I never thought about a shared driveway before now but now I know I won’t touch it!

You’d be suprised how many people behave like this…

My neighbour allows his family/friends and tradespeople working at his house to park across the access to my driveway but would be outraged if we did the same to him. He has two cars so parks on on the drive and one in front of his driveway presumably to avoid the chances of anyone blocking his drive.

Highly frustrating. I wish people would be more considerate.

@RJ2023 I sympathise. I regret buying our house because of neighbours too. Every time we viewed the house there were no parking issues. Once we moved in it became 3 cars parked opposite our exit onto the shared driveway. We’re left with a couple of centimetres leeway to get the car out, yet they have a huge drive that could easily accommodate their cars. We’re fed up of the number of visitors they have blocking the shared drive too.

You are not supposed to park on the shared driveway, if there is plenty of room down the road and you said neighbour could park there, why couldn't your visitor?

Had this sort of problem in previous house and it's not OK to block driveways. Why couldn't your visitor park in the road? Mine always did, as did my neighbours. Honking isn't the most polite way to react, agreed, but after knocking once then fair play.

but neighbour 3 bought the house with the big driveway, presumably that was reflected in the price she paid for it.

I share a drive way with neighbours and neither of us leave a car parked where it will stop the other household getting in or out. If a guest of mine parks on the drive and would obstruct the other parking area then I ask them to move as soon as they arrive. They do the same.

Oh god, you sound like an awful neighbour. I'd be honking my horn too!