about receiving crappy gifts?

[streth]

Just had a birthday and the gifts were seriously disappointing. I would have preferred nothing just so I do not have to get rid of them.

The gifts were:

Baking tin set wrapped in Christmas twine in a Christmas gift - I don't bake
A bag with a political slogan which smells strongly of takeaway food like Chinese
A scarf in a crushed box which is not my colour or style
Box of generic fudge from tourist city - the kind where they change the sleeve on the box to the location
Another box of stuffed dates that I received last year also

I don't like any of these and have given most of them to the charity shop already but I guess what hurts is the complete lack of thought. They seem regifted (definitely the Christmas one) which is fine but they didn't have in mind whether I actually like these things. I don't. They know me well enough to know I do not like these kinds of gifts. It is just very disappointing.

In that case I guess you're just venting & not going to make any changes that would prevent this from happening again

I dislike re-gifting. I don't do it myself & I think it pretty much always obvious when it happens. But each to their own I guess

I have told people numerous times that I am a minimalist and the kinds of things I like but it is not going to make a difference if people are short of cash or it is easier just to get rid of something they do not want.

I voted YABU but only because you've not kept them all to re-gift right back!

It took me ten years to stop my MiL giving me the same thing for Christmas every year. A food item I don't really like that was always slightly out of date - I finally realised she was getting it herself every year as as a birthday gift in June and then regifting it to me in December. She meant well and just wasn't hearing the hints about me not liking it, nor noticing that they were well past their best by the time I got them. In the end DH told her, in passing and casually, that I had totally given up eating pretty much anything with sugar in, and finally it stopped.

I will regift if it feels like a present someone would like. But outright tat, no, and I understand that you feel hurt and frustrated, OP.

I’d have just dumped them in the bin. They don’t sound worth donating.

Gift giving is a love language to me and thoughtless gifts are so hurtful.

Regifting is lazy and stingy in my opinion. If you’ve been given something that doesn’t suit you but you know a mate will love, just give it to them ffs. That’s a nice thing to do. But don’t give it as a present.

I wouldn’t have the guts to say anything to good friends - I might take the piss and say ‘thanks for Christmas bake set in June (laughy emoji) … can I ask why?’ but I would certainly think less of them. They’ve just physically shown you they don’t care about you.

My ex MIL and SFIL gave me an ovulation test kit on the last birthday I was with my ex. I didn't speak to either them in the 7 months between my birthday and me splitting up with ex. ExMIL wanted grandchildren. Well, she has thanks to my ex's DB - 3 biological and 4 step.

I am happy to regift but only if I feel the receiver would genuinely like it otherwise I will donate it.

Well done on working it out. There usually is some reasoning behind some of the regifted gifts. It just shows they are are not really giving something with the true meaning of a gift but just regifting stuff they probably do not like or want themselves.

Sad it took DH to step in before she would listen.

I would be too embarrassed to give tat to friends!

I was tempted to dump them but if it raises money for the charity then it is worth it.

Gift giving is definitely my love language too. I love buying ]gifts and wrapping them beautifully with ribbons and tags!

I understand this.. at home we now say within reason and budget what we would like or if money would go towards something it's a win win x