To allow DD to be a vegetarian?

[Summerlovin28]

Had one of the school mums, who is also a lunch lady today, make a comment at school pick up today. DD (who is 6) is a vegetarian by her own accord and she has been since she was 4. No one else in the family is a vegetarian but I am a believer in being honest about where meat has come from - due to this honesty DD said she did not want to eat meat anymore as she didn’t want to eat animals, which I said she had a every right to do so. I understand she is quite young but she’s also quite switched on and the idea of eating meat genuinely makes her upset and so I would feel uncomfortable putting pressure on her to. She eats a lot of cheese, egg and beans so does still get protein.
The school mum came up to me on the playground today and said ‘I didn’t know you were all vegetarians’ to which I explained that we weren’t and her response was ‘well that’s a bit silly allowing her to do that isn’t it?’ I was just taken aback and laughed it off a little but it has ruffled my feathers up!

Am I being unreasonable (or a bit silly) to allow her to be a vegetarian?

You're better than me, at 4 I would have said 'OK love' and hid the meat in her meals and not brought it up again.

😬

Well there is someone who is "a bit silly" here but its not you. What a stupid thing to say. Continue to teach your daughter that her views and opinions matter to you and you will raise a woman who knows she is entitled to have views and express them.

I have a dd who is vegetarian another that went pescatarian for years but recently started eating meat again. Its their choice not ours.

Well done for hearing your dd.

Her views an opinions matter. If she has stuck to it so far then that’s great. But it is also up to you, because you make her meals. Who it is not up to is some random other person.

Many children grown up vegetarian and are just fine. There is no reason she won’t be.

I can't imagine what's silly about being vegetarian!

My kids have been vegetarian from birth, all doing fine in every count. Why is it silly that you’re allowing her to choose?

Some (most) people are idiots OP. Like, just a bit stupid. I wouldn’t give it another thought.

She sounds unhinged

You sound like a good mum listening and valuing your daughters feelings and opinions. Your daughter will know she can count on you for discussion and support throughout her life when needed.

Snap

My husband decided that he was vegetarian when he was 6. It was the 1950s and his mother thought it was a phase and agreed. She and the rest of the family carried on eating meat. No idea what he ate as his mother's cooking was basic to say the least. Tinned soup seems to have been a theme.

70+ years later he is still going through that phase. Hasn't eaten meat since.

My son didn't like the texture of meat (this includes meat substitutes) I often got comments about his he needs to eat meat to be healthy.

Well done for shouting hey she can make informed choices

Tbh OP, I’m a keen meat eater. We are in the country - we shoot and eat pheasants/partridge/duck/geese and have venison. I prep everything myself, the majority of our meat is from within 3 miles and everything is free range! I must admit, I love a good steak though and that comes from a rare breed cattle farmer 40 miles away. If my daughter wants to be vegetarian then I will always 100% support her. If she wants to be vegan I will always support her - because my choices aren’t her choices and she has the agency to decide what she puts in her body. My role as her mother is to support her, as long as she is healthy.
Good on you!

My son has been a vegetarian from aged 8 he is now 40.

It's fine as long as you're happy/able to meet her nutritional needs in other ways.

What will you do if she finds out about the horror of the dairy and egg industries and wants to be vegan?

I think it’s fine as long as she understands which it sounds like she does. I would be checking “do you know this means you can’t have xxx” though.

I know someone who was vegetarian and her child was raised as such but at about 4 decided she wanted to try meat and was allowed to. A lot less people would make a fuss about that.

My DD has been a vegetarian since she was about 8 (she’s 10 now). She understands that meat comes from animals and doesn’t want to eat them. She does eat fish at the moment. She also knows not eating meat means she must eat things like beans and lentils and she does to be fair.
I wouldn’t force her to eat meat if she doesn’t want to.

Is she just not having meat and fish, or are you making sure she doesn't have things like gelatin. If it's just the meat and fish at some point you need to have a talk with her about things like that.

But well done for supporting her. It's great and hopefully you will find some veggie dishes the whole family love.

Thank you everyone. I guess I just needed a bit of validation that it wouldn’t be everyone’s view on it! She’s a kind soul and I just want to respect her views, if that means not eating meat then I’m happy for her to do that! Meals have been quite easy to adjust for her and she does eat the Quorn substitutions quite a lot as well. I have always been honest about where meat comes from, however I have been a little hesitant about telling her the truth about the dairy industry as I don’t know how to approach that just yet. Eggs aren’t to bad as we buy them from a local smallholding with free range hens!

I was a farmers daughter and told my mum I wanted to be veggie (much to my dad's disgust). She allowed this and I haven't eaten meat in 40 years, the slaughtering of animals on the farm was horrible. However I brought my kids up eating meat and have left the choice up to them.

My and my wife are vegan, but my 1yo is not. I'm just not confident enough in making sure she gets everything she needs. But as she ages, I'll teacher her where food comes from, and let her decide. She has my support whether she remains eating meat, or if she wants to be veggie/vegan.

It's fine OP and it's really no one's business. Even children can express some basic preferences around food. It doesn't matter as long as they're eating a varied, balanced diet. Contrary to popular belief, people and children won't keel over if they don't have meat with every meal. I give my girl meat, but tonight she had a tofu stir fry and loved it! Some days she'll have black bean fajitas like us, others I'll switch it up and do hers with chicken.

You should never ever make her eat meat when she doesn’t want to because of this reason it will mess her up, there is nothing wrong with being a vegetarian!!!! She will grow up fine and she sounds like a wonderful little human

Why? Why does she have to eat meat?

I've been vegetarian since I was about 4. My DH is vegetarian, he wanted to be vegetarian growing up but wasn't allowed to. Guess who out of the two of has the better relationship now with their parents?

My 5-year-old however knows where meat comes from but wants to eat it, so he does. Its a personal decision and not one I get to make for him.

My son turned veggie aged 5. I didn’t feel I could object because my dh was too.
I functionally became one too, though I am not technically V.
I don’t think I would have been so forthcoming if it wasn’t for dh though!

good for you though
btw six years on he is still veggie and I imagine may be for life.

ps holidays in France are a PITA

Yanbu, my mum did the same for me around that age. I just didn’t want to eat animals.

Im 32 now, was the fastest runner in school and competed at a high level in sports (international level) all while being veggie! So definitely didn’t impact me physically.

Im vegan now and raising my daughter veggie. I am very grateful my parents supported my choice to be veggie.

Educate her on the abhorrent living & working conditions endured by some of the humans ‘employed’ to pick vegetables in all corners of the globe (ok, but maybe don’t tell her the world is cuboid).
Make sure she doesn’t wear leather shoes (but remind her how her feet will stink) and I hope your car doesn’t have leather seats or she’ll be walking more than usual!

one of the school mums, who is also a lunch lady

It’s got absolutely nothing to do with her 😵‍💫.

Carry on!