New boyfriend liking girls provocative photos on instagram

[Custardcreams25]

Met someone 2 months ago and he’s asked me to be his girlfriend. I did think it may be too soon and was concerned I might be a rebound (separated from wife for 1 year and currently divorcing) but I’m divorced myself and know how long the process takes so thought I’d give him the benefit of the doubt. He seems lovely and we get on like a house on fire.

Last night I had a niggling thought to check his instagram and who he follows (I know). However my last two long term partners cheated on me and I found out they were on dating apps during the relationship so I do have trust issues.

I noticed he follows a lot of woman from our area who I know from my clubbing days. Didn't think much at first. However I clicked on one of their profiles and shes very beautiful. Lots of scantily dressed photos and he has liked a selfie one of her posing in her bikini yesterday. There was a few other woman’s provocative photos who he has liked the last few days. The woman don’t follow him back bar one.

AIBU to be pissed off? It’s really given me the ick especially as he was at mine this weekend where I cooked and we slept together. The same day he’s been liking these photos. It doesn’t help he’s almost 10 years older than me and these woman look like they’re in their early twenties.

I’m meant to be seeing him tomorrow but this has given me a sour taste in my mouth and I don’t think I want to anymore. Any advice appreciated!

Yes, I'd send that! Its

Pressed the button too soon!

It is embarrassing for you to be associated with a man who likes other women's pictures. There are lots of men out there who don't perv on other women like that.

I've got guys on my social media who like my pictures who are clearly in relationships. I feel bad for their partners and often wonder if they know what a creep they are involved with. Even if these guys were single, there's no way I'd ever give them the time of day. They are pathetic.

I was talking to a guy ages ago, he was really hot and seemed lovely in person. But then I noticed he was liking a mutual friend's pictures - ones where she was looking sexy, not ones of her walking the dog or having lunch with family. I stopped talking to him other than basic politeness. I got the ick and couldn't fancy him after that.

There was another guy I knew who was single for years - his social media was full of scantily clad ladies pictures that he'd shared and liked. I notice he stopped a few years ago and he now seems to have a girlfriend. I wonder if someone had a word with him a few years ago about how creepy he was being.

Thanks @HiddenInCubeOfCheese ! I seem to have an awful sense of judgement when it comes to men. .

Ego wank 😂Love it. He’s went quiet now and put a generic reply that doesn’t initiate a response. If he sends anything else I’ll send that.

I don’t understand why men pushing 40 behave like this. @PerkyGreenCat thanks for your reply, I had that before recently! A local gent added me on Facebook. He was very handsome and I presumed he was single. Liked all of my selfie photos and then the following day put a story on and he was on holiday with his kids and missus. 😫I blocked him straight away. They just seem so disrespectful!

You've done the right thing.

In my opinion it’s not a good look. I would expect it from teenage boys or young men in their early 20’s to have a Instagram full of girls and liking their photos but a 30-40 year old man? Instant ick.

It screams disrespect too. Someone on my Facebook constantly likes my photos and everyone else’s, shares posts of young woman hardly dresses and he has a girlfriend. Always gives me the ick

Slightly different perspective to others:

Different people have different boundaries. This could be something he doesn’t think much of, or his exwife could also not have given it a second thought. It is okay for you not to like it (I wouldn’t either) but that doesn’t mean that it’s the default conduct for everyone. If this is something ‘icky’ for you amongst other things and you think that you don’t align in many ways then it’s early and easy enough to cool things off.

However, if you like him enough and want to continue, then address it and his actions following that will be telling of who he is as a person. If he respects that it’s a boundary for you and unfollows these empty accounts (no real connections) and stops engaging with models, then you have found someone that respects you and that is telling.

I’d also like to say that ‘a niggling’ to check someone’s instagram follower list and then clicking on girls accounts to scroll around and see if he’d liked the photos is questionable behaviour. When you look for a problem you will find it. Try to work on that going in to any relationship as you will constantly have arguments about stuff.

This is total rubbish. Perfectly possible and plausible to like a photo without sending a message.

If you're judging them for liking the pictures why on earth do you upload them in the first instance?

I wouldn’t like this either, OP.
My 16 year old recently dumped her boyfriend for the same reason!

We’ll agree to disagree. My experience of men like this is there’s no smoke without fire. They cast their net wide and see what comes back to bite.

We aren’t talking about a 17 year old boy liking his college mates photos here. This is a man nearing 40 who is going out of his way to like photos of multiple women, ones who don’t even follow him back. What does he hope to gain from liking it? Hoping for a bit of attention in return, that’s what.

@catlovingdoctor Sorry, what?! I shouldn't post any photos of myself on my own social media account just incase someone's perv of a husband/partner decides to disrespect his relationship by liking them?

I don't post naked or underwear pictures but should be free to do so if I want to. I look good (sometimes!) so why shouldn't I take pictures to show off and look back on? I love seeing my friends on social media looking and feeling great about themselves.

I post pictures from a night out or whatever I've been up to where I can be bothered to take or pose for a picture. I have no issue with single men liking my pictures to signal some interest. It's a bit weird when Kevin who has been married for 20 years has been liking my pictures for the last decade and it's mainly the pictures of me on my own looking hot on a night out.

Thing is, these kinds of men don’t just like a bikini pic or whatever. It’s not a case of “she was wearing a short skirt!”. They’re fucking creeps that will like a simple selfie with nuns in a church on Easter Monday