To not mention miscarriage to pregnant friend?

[ScentOverTheEdge]

Hi all. Sorry if this is the wrong forum but need advice. My sister is pregnant, due in July following a miscarriage a few months ago. I’m thinking it would be triggering to mention my friend has just had one too, or am I overthinking? If she asks how my friend is shall I just deflect and not tell her? YABU = Be honest about friend’s MC. YANBU = Deflect and don’t mention MC to her. Thanks in advance x
edited to add - title should say sister!

As your sister didn't even know your friend was pregnant why on earth would you tell her? Especially as it might upset your sister, and maybe your friend doesn't want her personal business broadcasting. Not sure why it would enter your head to be honest.

OP doesn’t seem to think friend who has had miscarriage wants it kept secret and unless it's been specifically stated as such I don't think it's unreasonable to assume it isn't a secret

I think it's very unreasonable to assume it isn't a secret.

Especially when checking is so simple.

She lost the baby. So they already knew she was pregnant.

Then you don't mention it.

Unless you sister knew about your friends pregnancy then you need to keep your friends personal medical information to yourself.

I can't believe it's even a question really. Who an Earth divulges stuff like this? When (or even indeed if) your sister asks how your friend is, surely you just say "she's alright" unless you are a gossip or a drama queen.

When (or even indeed if) your sister asks how your friend is, surely you just say "she's alright" unless you are a gossip or a drama queen
It's only gossiping if done with glee. I don't consider anyone talking about me and anything I might be going through, with empathy, to a third party as gossiping about me or being a drama queen. Only that both people care about me and would want to know if I had had bad news. Same as if it was good news.

I think you should have just asked anyone to answer if they’ve actually had a miscarriage.
anyone else’s opinion isn’t valid.

As someone who has had several miscarriages I do not see the secrecy around not being able to talk about them.

You don't speak for all women who have experienced pregnancy loss.

As someone who has also had miscarriages, I wouldn't like to think my friends were telling everyone they knew about my losses. Those were my babies and it was my (very sad) news to share with those I felt would support me.

This isn't about secrecy around miscarriages, it's about the OP turning someone else's grief into a story to fill a gap in conversation.

Edited as I missed an update from OP