AIBU to think this is bullying?

[cantthinkofausername26]

I was on long term sick for 6 months. My boss didn’t contact me once to ask if I was ok. All communication was through HR.
i am back at work now and have been for 6 weeks. My boss has still not spoken to me, popped down to see if I’m ok, says welcome back. She doesn’t email me, she doesn’t reply to emails, I’ve literally not seen her in 6 weeks. For context there are only 6 people in my department that age manages.
I feel like it’s deliberate. She chats to everyone else, has meetings and catch ups, but I’m invisible.
when someone else went on long term sick a few years ago she did the same to him.
I feel like it’s emotional bullying. AIBU?

FWIW, I agree with the PP too.
You appear to be looking for something to be unhappy about out. You are the one who has been away. Make an effort to see your boss and catch up, especially as you are part time so it’s not easy to catch you at work, in staff meetings etc.

Some managers seem to take offense when you're off sick, as if you're off as a way of personally insulting them. My manager is one of them and I'm reaching the end of my tether with him. I was off for 6 months last year, came back on reduced duties, and now I'm signed off again for another month. He's furious about it and is now kicking off as he saw me 'looking pretty healthy' in a cafe with a friend. Thankfully HR are wonderful and will crucify him if he does anything against him. So he can rage away, I don't care.

In your opinion.
I have my opinion, so let's agree to disagree.

This reminds of a conversation at work many years ago with a colleague who thought if you were signed off sick you should never leave the house until you went back to work. Years ago when off after an ectopic when I had major surgery the nurse employed by the company I worked for advised me to get out of the house. She was so right because I was starting to not wanting to go out. How are you supposed to know if you are getting better if you don't start going out. Going out for a couple of hours with a friend to a coffee shop is not the equivalent of doing a full days work. The same when I was off with depression and anxiety. Those visits to friends etc where part of what helped my recovery.

It’s poor management but I wouldn’t class it as bullying, necessarily

I don’t know if I would describe it as bullying but it’s terrible LM and a very high-risk strategy from her point of view. I’m sure whoever LM’s her would be unimpressed.

If I was in your position I would be pissed off and feel unsupported. But I think the most pragmatic course of action would be to do what a pp said and arrange an informal catch up. It may not be your responsibility but it would be in your best interests to get the working relationship back on track.

Yes, I work in the NHS. And I see managers try and hide their scepticism when people come back at six months.

Exactly. It's about transitioning back to normal. And in my particular case, how much of a fuckwit do you have to be to begrudge someone having lunch with a friend 3 days after breast cancer surgery? That's why I know HR will slaughter him if/when I tell them.

I think when managers resent people going off sick, it is a symptom of the lack of adequate budget in the system and the stress of having to find cover. It is not really the fault of the manager and of course not the person who is genuinely sick. But it is a symptom of how underfunded some public systems are.

The head of department is answerable of course to the head and parents and pupils. They are under pressure. And some might inadvertently let that show to the person who is off sick. That’s not right but I can see how bad systems make this happen.