Breastfeeding a SIX year old - aibu?

[flufffffy]

I was taking to another mother at gymnastics yesterday. She casually mentioned that she sometimes still breastfeeds her SIX year old. That sometimes her six year old will come to her and “have a go” and that she has milk left. I’m not making this up, it really happened, and she wasn’t pulling my leg.

I truly had no idea what to do with my face, so I made it look very polite.

Isn’t this a bit weird? I mean, the six year old will remember it when she’s older, surely?

I want to be told I’m being judgemental and unreasonable - because I feel bad for being so judgmental and horrified!

This child has no younger siblings, btw, so it’s not like she’s doing it because they are.

I have a six year old boy and there’s no way in hell I would occasionally breastfeed him! I breastfed up until he was 18 months, so it’s not like I’m not sympathetic to long-ish term breastfeeding.

But tbh my post was mostly in support of extended breastfeeding (not a defence of bottle feeding) as I so often see defenders of extended bf are those who’ve done it themselves and I wanted to offer support as someone who largely couldn’t.
I’m so grateful formula exists - I agree it’s pervasive and shouldn’t be ‘the norm’ - but I don’t think this debate is about formula so much as age.

I know that, thank you for your comment. But you mentioned bottle feeding and I am very aware some women have no choice but to bottle feed through no fault of their own & despite their best efforts. I'm afraid that I used our post to reassure them that there is no criticism of them.

However, I feel that the bigger issue is the advertising of formula & the normalising of bottle feeding over breast feeding. Breast feeding your baby should be portrayed as the 'normal' thing, not bottle feeding for so many reasons.

I breast fed one of mine until they were two. One day they bit me and that was it. I stopped immediately. I think it's up to the mum really and no one should judge.

Oh my goodness, ouch! 😬

Personally I find it weird to breastfeed older kids. No reason to do it unless there is a famine. I think it's more about mums wanting to keep their children in a baby stage. There is something bordering on incestous with an older child sucking on his mums tits, it does gross me out tbh. There are plenty of healthy foods, a 6 year old does not need to breastfeed. You comfort a child that age by hugging him, talking to him not by sticking your breast in his mouth.

Why on earth are you thinking so much about this? You chose not to do this, her choice is different- that’s fine. It’s highly likely any feeding a 6 year old is doing is a comfort feed at night time, it won’t be affecting the rest of his nutrition, and suggests his Mum is putting his own needs above her fears of what others might think. I fed my youngest child until she was almost 4, it was only a bedtime feed for the last year of that, it helped her settle. I hate this overdramatisation of anything outside your narrow view of what is normal.

How beautifully put. I can see your are a bit of a wordsmith.

Yes - as an paleoanthropologist will tell you, it’s unlikely that hunter gatherer mothers were breastfeeding their 5/ 6/ 7 year olds. (In practical terms, think of the succession of younger children/ infants they would need to be feeding - unlikely the mother would have capacity to still be feeding a 6 year old.)

I’m quite interested in this idea that ‘natural term’ is between 2 and 7 years old. Is it based on any credible evidence? It doesn’t reflect common practice in the developing world either (though of course the influx of formula has muddied the waters a bit).

I laughed so hard at this

Not sure what I think TBH but am pretty certain that many people would judge a parent for giving their 6 year old a bottle of milk or a dummy! Both given for comfort as well.

So gross. The child is 6. A full primary school child. Grim.

This is very true! I definitely would, if I’m being honest. Obviously additional needs aside, before anyone points this out.

Fanks.

And it's you're or you are, remember for next time!

Tit.

All the scientific evidence I've seen says 2-4 is natural weaning age. I think due to children's stomach acid development there's also no immunity benefits to breastmilk beyond about 2 years (babies stomach are underdeveloped, which is why they benefit)

I'm also confused where all the posters saying 7 is natural weaning age are getting their data from. It goes against everything I've read about breastfeeding

It's a few years ago now, but I recall a Mum breastfeeding her 6yo child in the playground at pick-up time.

It's not my business how, why, or when she fed her child - and it's not my place to hold an opinion.

It felt quite unusual to me, but I just collected my own DCs and carried on with my day.

I think it’s weird but whatever, doesn’t affect me. Neither of our DC were breastfed much (one of them precisely zero times and one I managed nearly a week) so I’m hardly speaking from a place of experience.

Not your place to hold an opinion on a 6 year old breastfeeding in the school yard?
How self righteous are you? 😆
Everyone else will have had an opinion on that exhibition, rest assured.

Breasts are sexual though for people. Like very few people have any interest in elbows during sex, but breasts they do. So it’s not like sexualising something obscure, it’s forms part of the reproductive system and those bits are sexual/ised.

Yuck, that's grim.

It's weird and says something about the mum I'd say. I expect they co sleep still and dad sleeps in the spare room. Six year old is probably still in nappies too.

I can’t help but suspect it was in fact designed to provoke reactions. I mean by six you could surely say “just wait till we are home.”

Why are you disgusted by memories of seeing your parents naked?

Who in their right mind wants to remember that?

No big deal at all. Are you very religious or something?

Not at all I just didn’t wish to be subjected to my parents dangly bits on display so I don’t waft around naked in front of my kids.

Seems very odd to have such a string reaction. 🤷‍♀️