If the bride and groom haven’t mentioned anything about gifts on the invite would you…

[ForAquaMember]

Would you just give them cash? Or buy an gift?And how much? Close friend and I’m a bridesmaid. We are thinking of £50 max because I’m already paying out lots for the hen dress etc

Id give cash or vouchers for a department store....£50 is fine.

£50 is fine but they may have a gift registry, lots of people don't put it on the invite due to not wanting to seem grabby.

Cash in a card that covers the costs of your meals

Depends who they are. A close friend, I’d ask if they had a registry, money collection, or any preference for gifts. I think £50 sounds fine if they’re aware you’ve already committed money to attending, and if they’re snooty about it then the friendship should probably be reassessed anyway. Would probably throw in something like a bottle of champagne, but that’s preference.

I give cash, £50 is fine

Cash, and yes, £50 is fine.
It depends on your circumstances / budget too. Less is also fine.

Thanks everyone!

I would just ask the couple

We didn’t have a list, if people asked we told them to donate to MacMillan (second wedding so gift registry didn’t feel right and we didn’t want more stuff).
We still ended up with quite a lot of cash!

Ignore anyone who says this. The couple are hosting and therefore paying. The idea that guests need to cover the price of their meals is just ridiculous in so many ways.

I think the costs for the food and meal is probably £100 a person which we can’t afford £200 anyway!!

I would google to look for a gift registry. They often aren’t hard to find.

definitely only give what you can comfortably afford, regardless of form.

Yes!

Also, in my experience, bridesmaids don’t give more than token wedding presents. Regardless of whether they’re paying for their own dresses/ hair/makeup etc, they’ve generally more than paid their dues in ‘service’ in the run up to and during the wedding, or via spending money attending an expensive hen. If it’s the type of wedding where the bridesmaids just show up on the day and do a bit of bouquet-holding, that’s a different matter.

That's exactly why it's a stupid "rule".

When I was a bridesmaid last year I gave a cross stitch wedding sampler that I had made.

£50 in a card is absolutely fine.

bank transfer.

I got married a few months ago and I'd say £50 is pretty much what everyone gave. It ranged from £30 to £100 I think, plus actual physical presents. I was amazed how much people gave to be honest, when they'd already trekked down to celebrate with us.

Can’t you just ask them if they have a gift register? If they haven’t, then go ahead as you suggested, but if they do, you might prefer to choose from it

Yes £50 is fine. I’ve only ever seen on here covering the cost of your meal

Agree. Absolutely bloody hate this mentality of covering the cost of your meal. The bride and groom are the hosts, they pay for the meals, end of.

Buy a Toast Rack, or if you really want to push the boat out, a Toaster.

Oh this is interesting. I wouldn’t give cash or voucher at all. If there was something suitable as a token gift I’d give that. But. It a present just for the sake of it. Else just a nice card.

Email and ask whether they have a list

I think it is fairly traditional in most cultures for a guest to take a gift for the hosts, whatever the occasion.

Whereas, obviously I would have invited the people I want to share the day with me, it would be very, very unusual for any guest at a wedding to not want to give the happy couple either a present, or (much more common these days) cash towards whatever they need it for.