AIBU to not let my 12 year old go to Alton towers

[GeorgieTK]

With her 13 year old friend alone? No parent there, just dropped off and picked up at the end of the day.
For a bit of context she doesn't do really big rides, she's done wicker man, thirteen amd galactica but gets very scared despite wanting to do them so that's one concern. Another is peer pressure to do the bigger rides when she'd have a panic in the queue. And another just generally is she too young?!

My kids school took them at 12. Can’t see the issue myself

Depends how far away an adult will be. We went with school around that age, and were allowed to go off in groups. But there were teachers there on site. Undecided!

I don’t think 12 is too young. Mine were fine to do this at 12/13.
The thing that might be a problem for me is that there’s only two of them. Mine have always been in bigger groups until they were happy to go in everything. It all depends on how much you trust her friend not to get fed up if your DD decides she doesn’t want to ride or how your DD would react if her friend rides and she doesn’t.

We went in Y6 .. All headed off in our own groups, met back at the coach

it seems the right age - we love further south so Dd has done Chessington by herself at that age and school trips to Thorpe Park.

She is growing up she needs to start managing that herself with the rides

I think you're being unreasonable about the fear aspect, she'll have to figure that out for herself, she'll be peer pressured into them or not go on them, not the end of the world either way.

I get she seems young to be roaming all day but it's a closed site, there's staff everywhere and limited scope for getting into trouble. It's a very normal thing to do at this age, as pp said if she went with her school they'd be letting them go off to do their own thing, not much difference.

She’s not too young.
Peer pressure is really quite normal and it’s not like she’s being pressured into anything dangerous.
If she didn’t want to ride the rides she wouldn’t be wanting to go.
Stop wrapping her up in cotton wool and let her go and have a good time. She’ll be full of stories - especially if she does end up being egged on to go on a bigger ride!

Sounds a bit controlling
Do you think they will get lost 🤣

YABU.
School trips in highschool from yr 7 to Alton Towers and thats exactly what happens, they all go off and meet at end of the day.

Does she have a phone?

Theres lots of staff
She will be fine.

My DS went to Thorpe Park with school last year when he was in year 7 - he'd have just turned 12 - and they were left to it all day (although obviously staff were on site).

Her age is fine but being easily talked into scarier rides that she can cope with is a big issue.

I don't think they'll get in through the gate without an adult?

ETA: I see it's 12 yrs without an adult.

Wouldn’t worry me.

DD did this at 12, her friends were 13. I did it from 13 too.

Not a chance my DD would have been pressured to ride something she didn’t want to though, she was headstrong. But even if that did happen and they didn’t like it, it isn’t going to traumatise them for life.

No I wouldn’t let my 12 dd go on her own. Yes with a school or youth group where there was a responsible adult available at a checkpoint but not on their own. Far too young if shit hits the fan or they get unwanted attention.

Looks like they’re fine at 12

I think 12 is fine. I would just talk to her about the peer pressure and make sure she knows that she’ll have to hang around if her friends want to go on scarier rides than she wants to.

It's the fact there's no parent there at all that's worrying me i think. With school at least you can go and find a teacher......

Gee whizz no, we practically had to wear oxygen masks last time I went there so that we weren’t high as a kite with all the weed wafting.

Does she ever spend a few hours with her friends and no adults?
By 12 my dd was spending a few hours at places like the local shopping centre and would have phoned if there was a problem and she wanted to go home early so going to a self contained places like Alton Towers was fine.

Nope. I wouldn't feel comfortable with that at all but mine are grown now. One of mine went to another theme park with school. Didn't like big rides and while sitting one out was approached my two men who were being suggestive. She was about 14-15 at the time. Yuk!

Lol

It's one of the few places I've never smelled weed in my life.

Unless there’s a back story of being unusually untrustworthy, I think 12 is the right age to start doing things like that. It doesn’t feel too young, but you know your child.

no you cant. thats just a false sense of security. there are places in alton towers where your daughter could find an appropriate adult if they needed to. this is about giving them some responsibility and building resilience and this is exactly the right age to do it and in the right setting. i would sooner let a 12 year old with friends in alton towers than out shopping. this is a closed environment, full of cctv with appropriate adults on hand. in terms of letting them go, this is probably the safest space you could do it in. its safer than letting them walk the streets to or from their friends.

If DD genuinely wants to go, I would let her. Make sure she has a back up plan. Eg meet at such and such at x o'clock in case she loses phone/friend. Knows where to go if she gets lost etc.
But I would have a thorough talk with her. She may not want to go. You can happily be the badguy for her that says maybe next year

I would let my DD 12 go.