AIBU to not want to look like a Christian

[Todaytodaytodaytoday]

First of all, I have nothing against Christians. I have friends and family members of that faith, whom I respect and admire. My dilemma (if you can call it that) is that I was once given a beautiful gold necklace with a little crucifix on it. Not a big jesus-y one - just a solid gold cross with a pattern on it, with another smaller cross in front of that - not that big. The thing is, I love it and want to wear it, but on the odd occasion I do, I feel self-consious, believing people will assume I am religious. I don't know why this bothers me - I know it shouldn't - but I think it has something to do with identity and self-expression. It just feels wrong somehow. I don't want to be perceived as anything other than I am. Am I being silly?

This. Other people do not think about us anywhere near as much we think they do. 99.9 per cent of people you interact with probably don't think about you at all outside that immediate interaction and a lot of people are pretty unobservant about small details, like what necklace you are wearing. It's quite freeing when you realise that.

Thank you. That was nice and ... grounding.

Most high street fashion stores have cross necklaces in their jewellery collections. Lots of my necklaces are crosses, it’s just a shape to me. A simple design that goes either everything. I didn’t realise people would be looking at me thinking I was religious!

I wear a small cross sometimes I'm not a practicing Christian, it was my gran's. It's pretty and it reminds me of her.

I'm a confirmed atheist but I wear a cross my mother gave me on my 18th birthday.

If anybody remarks on it I tell them it's to ward off vampires

I would definitely assume that someone wearing a small cross (not a performative one, like Goths wear) was a Christian.

I really doubt anyone cares or is reading much into it. And if they do, why you would care about that?

Wear it if you want to 🤷‍♀️

Yeah right....
The cross is the symbol of Christianity.
The crucifix is the symbol of Catholicism.

None of them? Easy, do not wear them.

So many conflicting opinions. This is like the inside of my head.

As an atheist I'd feel inauthentic wearing a cross.

I would never wear a cross, no matter how nice it is. I’m a very committed atheist and it’s important to me. I would assume that anyone wearing a cross has some connection to Christianity. But each their own

I would assume someone wearing a cross is a christian, yes

I've worn crosses for years, before and since becoming a Christian (although my particular denomination doesn't approve of crosses, you won't find them in our churches.) Like @MistressoftheDarkSide , I'm a Goth and it just sort of goes with the territory. Never wore a pentagram, even when I was a Wiccan though. I used to work with two women who both wear them and neither of them are pagan/Wiccan.

It's very common to get religious symbols as presents if you family is. For luck, protection, just as a lovely thought. Anybreason really.

Just wear it. If anyone asks you can say it was present from your family 🤷 Because it was.

Christian family here with adult daughters. “Looking like a Chriso” means looking particularly wholesome and frumpy- think Damson Madder. It’s one step removed from looking Hasidic which is a look we rock often.
Don’t think any of us wear a cross. Wearing a crucifix (the wee manny) is more of a statement.

I’m an atheist and I wouldn’t wear a cross.

Just do what you want to do. Second guessing the reactions of others is a pointless occupation

Don't wear it if it bothers you, or wear it tucked in. I am Christian but not evangelical, I sometimes wear a cross because my Godmother bought it for me as a confirmation present. I have a gold Star of David too that was a very special gift and I wear that when I feel like it. Maybe people think I'm Jewish when I wear it.

No one really cares in France either, in real life a lot of people wear crosses and no one bats an eyelid.

Are the crosses pendants that can be removed from the necklace, leaving just the chain? Perhaps by a jeweller -- and then could be reattached when needed by using a large jump ring of some kind. Or are they intergral/fused?

They can be removed, but that would just leave a boring gold chain. Its the crosses that make it look pretty.

I have a plain gold cross which I do not wear now for the same reason. I chose it during my Buffy phase (because i needed to ward off vampires clearly) and my Pride and Prejudice phase because it went well with all those regency neck lines. Now it mostly sits in the jewelry box.

I'm an atheist, I wouldn't wear a cross, I didn't get married in a church. It would feel a bit wrong to me to wear a cross. If I saw someone wearing a cross I would assume they were Christian.

I feel like I've just been mansplained to?

Disagreeing with you isn't 'mansplaining' (and I'm not a man). And I don't think your comparison is remotely valid, because wearing a cross doesn't say 'I am a practising Christian' any more than celebrating Christmas or being called Joseph does. It simply says 'I'm someone who grew up in a country where Christianity is the norm'.

Wearing a tichel absolutely does say 'I am a very strict and practising orthodox Jewish woman'.

I wear a St Christopher. I'm not a Christian and nobody has ever assumed I'm a Christian on that basis. It belonged to my grandad, who was also very much not a Christian. I would not assume that the OP was a practising Christian because she was wearing a piece of jewellery with religious iconography on it.

Like the OP said herself - there are lots of conflicting opinions on this thread about what a cross might mean about the wearer. But I don't think there would be any conflicting opinions on what a hijab or a tichel meant about the wearer, because they are completely different things with completely different purposes.

I've put it on. I'm going to go out wearing it for a few days and see how I feel.

If I don't come back - assume I've been eaten by a lion.