To wonder if this is normal school policy for 3 year olds starting Pre-school?

[AnneMarieW]

My just turned 3 year old started pre-school today (they’ve been ill otherwise they would have started straight after Easter) - and just so I’m not dripfeeding they are my PFB after lots of IVF, will likely be an only child and have been at home with me till now (only ever babysat by grandparents), so accept I may be being overprotective.

I was surprised at the school open day that they only showed parents the pre- school classroom and a second empty classroom where they chatted with us - no tour of the rest of the school or grounds. But it’s as my closest school (easily walkable) and I want my DC to hopefully make friends locally, plus it gets a good Ofsted report, I made the choice to send DC there (although no school here is oversubscribed so there is a wide choice).

But they apparently also have no settling-in policy for pre-school (no limited starting hours or parent staying for the first session etc), no home visit to meet the child, no form to fill in about their likes/dislikes etc. I had to ask them to let my DC visit the school with me but again my DC only met one teacher and again only saw the pre-school classroom (there are 2 teachers in the class and multiple TA’s).

Then at drop off today, the 2nd pre-school teacher they hadn’t met before (so a stranger to DC) met us at the school gate and ushered them in - apparently parents aren’t normally allowed inside even on the first day as it’s disruptive to the children?

Is this the norm for starting pre-school? It seems very “throw them in at the deep end” and hope for the best.

There will be a lot of staff in nursery at this time of year, so won't necessarily be the teacher she saw once anyway. Our nursery have 4 main staff members but the summer term is the busiest term so often staff from other parts of the school are drafted in to make up the numbers and meet the ratios. That doesn't mean the children won't have a great time, but also another reason for why they can't be faffing around with one or two children when they have a full nursery of children to get into the building.
All the things you said you would have liked to have helped with give you good questions to ask your child e.g. where do you hang your bag? Does it have your name on it? Did you go to the toilet before snack time? Did you play indoors or outdoors?

No, in early years transition into a new setting is (usually ) seen as very important. Not necessarily parents staying but a couple of shorter sessions so children can become familiar with the new environment and adults. Home visits maybe. Stay and plays before the start of term. Information gathering is viewed as important too. Did you fill in a form before you started that asked about allergies or health conditions for instance. Emergency contacts?

Yes there was a basic form asking about the name they like to be known as, emergency contact information, any health issues or allergies. I’d have been horrified if they hadn’t at least done that - even our tiny local one woman forest school (where you only stay for an hour with your child) insists you fill out a form with those questions.

I agree that transition is really important- I suspect it was a bit too abrupt for DC. After a few days she is now saying she doesn’t want to go back. I suspect the “throw them in at the deep end method” is because it’s easier for the school rather than the 3 year olds themselves iykwim (that way the school don’t have to deal with any changes to their usual routines). I’m sure that if she’d been to a nursery before like most of the children apparently have, that she would have been fine but since she hadn’t…

I’ve been asking her questions about what she does there, being encouraging about how much fun she must be having playing with the other children… so we’ll see.

Did you fill in any paperwork? Only one of mine went to preschool but we had quite a few forms, likes, dislikes, if they were toilet trained, medical history, allergies, food they would/wouldn't eat.
The kids did have a settle session but without parents. Didn't seem to affect DC.
Tbh dropping them at the door is probably to get them used to school and it is disruptive to have parents there. Even some nurseries do drop at the door now as they find it works better (this started in Covid and is something that has just carried on)
I think you are worrying about nothing (and I get it, it's bloody hard with your first) but your child was happy which suggests the staff are good at their job. As long as your child continues to be happy I wouldn't be too worried about anything else.