Is this too much to eat in a day?

[SENSummer]

I’ve lost all perspective. So many hormone triggered gastro issues since having my kids and my daily diet has gone out of the window. I feel nauseas a lot but regardless of what I do/don’t eat. I wake up early (5am) and finish eating for the day at 4/5pm.

Today I’ve had:

Small porridge with banana and oat milk

slice of toast

a small plain chocolate cupcake (homemade) & a Kit Kat chunky

a salmon fishcakes with a couple of new potatoes and garden peas

a digestive biscuit AND about 3/4 of a bag of twirl bites!

I’m done for the day now but honestly feel awful (and a bit sick at how much sweet stuff I’ve had)

I will caveat this by saying I’m rather slim and definitely in the ‘a few extra pounds wouldn’t hurt’ category and I’m pretty physically active.

Does your husband eat a normal diet?

It does sound a tiny bit as if you are martyring yourself? Deliberate self-neglect?

Not too much but definitely not an ideal diet at all. Ditch the chocolate, have proper meals and you will feel a lot better.

My favourites: a handful of nuts (Lidl do a really nice bag of mixed roasted nuts). Greek yogurt, chopped dates and strawberries. Apple and peanut butter on toast. Cheese with a stick of celery. Mackerel in tomato sauce on an oatcake. A hard-boiled egg and soldiers.
I have porridge for breakfast and I add in a spoonful of tahini and nuts or flaxseed, berries and a bit of Greek yogurt. It makes it more nutritious and I'm not hungry til lunchtime.

It sounds like you do what I do and eat too many sugary snacks instead of adding in a balanced meal instead of the snacks. I’m addicted to sugar from being constantly stressed and exhausted ( 2 ND children over here). I’m working on it by increasing my meals (a salad for lunch instead of skipping lunch) and slowly reducing my sugar intake. Not going well so far!

You are not disgusting, let yourself off! Tomorrow is a new day!

It sounds a very small amount of food TBH, but given most of it is sugary treats I would say that is why you don’t feel too well,
not because you’ve actually eaten too much. It’s also possible you don’t fell well in the evening because your body is hungry as it’s craving nutrients.

Are you eating the fish cakes for lunch ? You may be better to add in a light supper eg some soup and toast early in the evening rather than the extra sweet snacks.

@SENSummer I would be very very careful about taking diet advice from a forum like this, especially since you have difficulties maintaining a healthy weight. I think you need expert advice from a dietician.

I also have porridge made with oat milk for breakfast, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I also add a banana. I make the porridge with flax seeds, hemp seeds and I add in some peanut butter. It keeps me full until lunch time. If you're happy with the porridge then you could find extra things to add to it for some extra nutrition.

I don't understand why anyone would tell you to cut out the potatoes. I love potatoes. I eat loads of them and I'm very fit and healthy. You need to add more food in, not take any of the good things you are already eating away!

Again be very careful about following advice on here. Some people will tell you to cut out this, cut out that, which is not really helpful when you already struggle to get enough nutrition.

You said you had "kids" plural. Where is the other child (children)? Youve only mentioned the boy.

You are not 'disgusting' in the least. You ate a few chocolates, you did not kill small children.
Please try to talk to yourself, and about yourself, like you would your very best friend.
You're doing ok. Life is hard and we made it through another day - I say bloody well done x

This

I think you know OP that you have had two meals in total then
chocolate and cake

Have a third meal including fruit and veg. Fibre will stop you feeling sluggish.

The specialist continence clinic recommended i bribe my dd with whatever it took!

Op I'm sorry it's so hard. I'm not sure if you are looking for validation, to vent, to get ideas for snacks (or reaching out for help). You are taking on a lot on top of your caring responsibilities to do all your own baking bread etc. Could they be allowed to slip a bit to allow focus on better meal habits?

Everyone is different but if you feel bloated then I guess you've eaten too much, or maybe the wrong type foods?
If there's things that don't agree with you it can feel bloating and uncomfortable even if you've not overeaten.

Oh yes... totally hideous!! How could you even type that!! 😱😱

But you're doing the same thing- giving advice (even if it's not to take advice!)

I said ditch the potatoes simply because I was trying to encourage OP to add other vegetables. If she's short of time it's better to add a different veg (because fish cakes are mainly potato anyway.)

I thought it was obvious that doubling up on one veg was not as nutritious as adding different veg.

You're only have 1 main meal and then loads of snacks. If you had 3 main meals you probably wouldn't eat as much crap in between

It’s absolutely outstanding how you know more about what will help THIS child who you have never met and know nothing about rather than the specialists who may have cared for them for years. Absolutely bore off.

I’m a midwife and part of the judgement, nuance and intelligence required for our roles is the ability to see when ‘the guidelines’ (which are a safety net and a springboard not carved in stone) aren’t right for the individual in front of you. It’s rare but tragic to see a HCP who can’t do this

Just to add, OP, there's a good Facebook contributor, I think it's called 100 Days of Picky Plates, and it's essentially daily healthy snacking plates she puts together.

You’re not discusting. My diet is similar some days, I also have an autistic teen that I care for, some days I’m exhausted and I crave carbs and sugar, sometimes it makes me feel awful. I don’t see the issue with fish cakes or home made cake.during March/April I think I consumed many bags of mini eggs secretly in my car 😬

Don’t be hard on yourself but do try and add more fruit and veg into your diet and maybe treat yourself each week to some chocolate when you’re doing a food shop.

Food should be a pleasure, a joy. It sounds like you're craving high sugar foods to dampen down stress and possibly for energy due to stress and tiredness. That's a normal biological response to stress and low energy, so don't beat yourself up about it.

Yes, you'd probably feel better if you ate 'better' -- more protein, fibre and generally nutrient rich foods, but the feeling better takes time, so maybe start small and build up the range of foods you're eating. It doesn't need to be 3 meals and 2 snacks it could be 6-8 snacks, or 4 meals, or nibbling throughout the day. It doesn't really matter as long as the overall quantity and quality of what you eat is good. I'd say that the last thing you need now is more pressure to do something (eating) in a fixed, prescriptive way. A PP suggestion above to 'add' rather than remove foods is really good advice.

Maybe start by thinking about foods you enjoy, or have enjoyed in the past and add bits of those in to your daily diet, then expand from there to improve the nutritional quality of your food. Berries and nuts are great snacks if you like them and are easy to carry around with you in a small lunch box. Generally though, protein can be fish, meat, nuts, seeds, pulses, quinoa, dairy products, sourdough bread. Fibre is brown/wholemeal grains, pulses, nuts, fruit and veg. Fruit and veg are also great for adding vitamins.

Good luck, I'm sure your son is wonderful in many ways, but also very, very hard work and emotionally exhausting. As well as the food, try to make sure you get enough rest and some breaks if at all possible.

It’s all carbs aka sugar, except for the peas (assuming the salmon cakes have a coating and potato).

It’s not too much food it’s just a day of eating sugar. You might feel better if you ditch the sugar and seed oil (oat milk) and add more protein and fibre.

Said completely without judgement as my diet has been awful of late.

I'd use a whole bag of haribo if it meant that he can use the loo, and I wouldn't feel a moment's guilt.

When DD1 (with SN) had an eating disorder, I did everything I could to make her gain weight. Chocolate croissants, pancakes loaded with double cream, butter, Nutella... Anything that would get her to gain weight.

You can't always follow the rules with these kids.

Surely you know that’s not very much to eat in a day?

Have you had a blood test? Anaemia and/or other deficiencies can cause nausea

Jesus, you must be starving! I say this as someone on the lower end of what’s considered a healthy BMI!!