What to reply when people constantly ask when are you going to work/how can you afford to be off?

[Sockmate123]

Currently on a career break and I'm getting so many comments/questions like this. Do ppl that are permanent SAHP's get this? I'm loving being off tbh and would love to extend it!

‘I’m not planning on returning. To be honest I don’t like working.

pause

however with DH away so much and the DC’s additional needs I’m needed at home for now so we will have to survive on one salary for a bit longer.’

Just say your focusing on your OnlyFans as the moment.

I think i will just say I'm lucky to be off. Both kids have additional needs, DH works abroad alot.

You don't need to say that you're lucky.

You're looking after two children with additional needs. People questioning that should mind their own.

I have "well carers allowance is just sooo lucrative..." for anyone that pushes me, only had to use it twice and thankfully both shut up at that point (they are both aware of my DDs health).

I refuse to say that I'm "lucky" to be off - if I was lucky then my DD wouldn't need full time care and I would be able to work.

Stuff like this is why I hate meeting new people. Always asking what you do for work. I am not able to work at the moment. If I say that, I get asked even more things. Then the unsolicited advice comes.

I've just seen your update. Maybe something like:

'I already DO have a full time job. Both kids have additional needs and DH works abroad alot.
Would you be happier if I also worked outside the home an additional 40hrs a week to the 60 I already do??? Smile and keep silent till they reply 😊

Remember you don't have to answer the truth to this intrusive question.

But I like drug dealing as a response. Dead pan.

Both kids have additional needs, DH works abroad alot.

If you know someone well enough to be telling them you don't work, I'd give them the genuine reasons! I presume you're not going up to random strangers in Tescos and telling them you don't work.

I get similar about money ‘how can you afford to go on so many lovely holidays, you’re so lucky’
I wish I could tell them all to mind their own business.

Just tell them you're rolling in money and you absolutely love lazing around all day

You dont need or have to tell anyone anything op.
I dont work at the moment i have work in the past so its not like ive never done it.
But this is mumsnet and everyone earns hundreds and owns their homes and never buy used or cheap things and everyones married.

But yet every day a post about money i want or need more cm hes not paying enough.
He`s cheating im looking in his phone.
I cant cope with my kids for a day on my own la la la.

I dont work im on benefits and pip i dont need to tell anyone why.
I rent from a council and shop on temu.
Im also dirt poor to mumsnet standards but i get by ok.

Agree

I took two career breaks because I fancied it. If I'd bought a bigger home or new car I doubt people would have had so many questions. Some people can't fathom not working.

‘Mind your own business’ would be my reply to anyone who asked me how I could afford something.

‘This works best for us as a family’ was my go to response.

Or just say “my husband works hard- tell yours to work harder and you can do the same as me” 😂

So just say that then next time, what is the big deal? Ridiculous. Use your words.

“I’m trying to drag it out for as long as I am able. I’m loving being off!”

you know some nosy people! I took a career break last year and not one person asked how I was affording it!

I say "I do work, I just don't get paid for it" when asked about being a SAHM.

“I’m an undercover agent for the women’s liberation army”

“Luckily we are filthy rich”

This has made me think. Maybe people aren’t making lots of money by selling pictures of their feet… perhaps this is just a response to nosey people asking how they afford their lifestyle 😂

Move your kids to private school - lots of parents not working, many whom retired minted in their 40s, quite a few families where neither parent needs to work. Those ones fascinate me but I’m not rude enough to say anything! You must have to mix with some pretty rude people but you’ve got some good comebacks here.

I hate these questions, it's worse when someone who already knows my situation asks it, i answer with something vague like "my situation requires me to be home" no need to tell them why I stay at home it's not their business

‘I’m still deciding what I want to do next’

‘I’m having a giant nervous breakdown. Better step away.’