9 yr old told off for calling non-binary teacher Sir

[Nowherecitizen]

My friend’s son was told off by a teacher at his school for referring to them as ‘Sir’. The teacher is male but identifies as non-binary.

Their title is Mx which the children are aware of. But the little boy simply looked at an adult who is visibly male and used the term Sir.

I have seen this teacher and they are 'masculine' looking but will sometimes wear a skirt and heels.

Friend’s DS felt bad and can’t recall exactly what was said to them but said the teacher was ‘very cross’.

AIBU to think this was mishandled? Surely the child should be reminded gently of the preferred identity of this adult but should not face a telling off?

What is the non-binary version of Sir anyway?

TY78910 · Today 13:38

What does the SC ruling got to do with this? Teacher wants to be called Mx. It is no different to a Mrs wanted to be addressed by her title as opposed to Miss.

Yes, it is different actually. The children are being asked to say something they know is not true, because they can see the teacher is visibly male. Marital status is not visible, and choice of Mrs / Miss / Ms varies according to personal choice anyway. Kids get the title/ marital status of female teachers wrong all the time. In fact in most schools they just call them all 'Miss'.

That's completely understandable. I certainly made innocent comments and mistakes when I was 9 including a daft comment about someone who was transgender. My left wing nans glare, soon put a stop to that and I learnt from that.

It really depends on what was said and how it was said! OP wasn’t there, it’s a third hand account. My DC thinks I’m telling her off when I say “DC take your shoes off as I’ve just mopped the floor” because that’s what kids do. Everything is personal.

Quite.

If this man wants his friends to validate him then that's up to them and their relationship.

It is not the job of 9 year olds.

Read some of the heartbreaking accounts on this thread. They are the logical conclusion of where some kids end up when they are taught by adults that you can change sex and not everyone is male or female. It is abusive to teach children that they must ignore the evidence of their own eyes and that the man stood in front of them is not really a man.

Gender ideology also teaches kids to keep secrets from their parents and is the very antithesis of safeguarding.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5333059-do-phalloplasties-actually-work?page=16&reply=144225884

The SC judgement has no relevance to nevermind impact on this situation. The misunderstanding on MN of what the SC held and its impact is pretty widespread.

“Hey kids, this is a man and this is a woman, oh apart from Mr X with the beard who is also a woman”. Is he bollocks.

So those who think children should do whatever the adults say they should - if the teacher says they must be called Doctor or Lord, despite this not being the actual case, should they comply with that?

I’m not clear on your point here?

Should we ignore (or stop taking about) this awful behaviour by a teacher because you’re not sure what constitutes a ‘telling off’?

I also don't feel it's reasonable.

What if he wanted to be addressed as 'his excellency the emperor of the world'? Would that be reasonable? Of course not.

I kept my own name upon marriage decades ago but was called my husbands suname all through my childrens schooling, despite all paperwork being very clearly to the contrary.

Did i Care?
Did i correct the teachers?

Of course I didn't.
I'm not a gobshite.

I would be making a meeting request for clarification if this had occurred if I was that parent.
And I'm not a complainer.
That would REALLY piss me off.

X post

Not because I am not clear on what constitutes as ‘telling off’ but because everyone has no idea if ‘telling off’ even happened.

This.

I'm sure the child would be able to learn to say Mr Johnson and not Mr Smith if that's how they were introduced? I bet he knows he sits next to Jamie and not Henry? I don't care about your ideology but at 9 with no additional needs I think the child knows how to address the person by the name they've requested? I've been called nana (in my 20s), mum and daddy. Genuine accidents are fairly easily to spot.

If they had innocently called the teacher 'sir' (either because they didn't know he didn't like it or it was a simple slip of the tongue), I would be very unimpressed with the school for telling him off.

If he was deliberately calling him a name he doesn't like (despite how silly I might find his preference), I would support school. My mum hates being called 'miss'. She isn't married but feels it makes her sound like a young girl rather than a woman. It would be wrong for someone to tease her by insisting on calling her 'miss', despite it being an accurate label. This feels similar.

Well this teacher is actually a "Sir".

If he says he isn't then he is being deceitful. Children shouldn't be lied to about this, and certainly should not be punished for recognising the deceit.

It's Mx X, stop mis-gendering meeeeeeeee

How is it abusive someone asked?

It is abusive for someone who holds clear power over another person (a child) to enforce their ideological belief system on that child.

Would you be happy with a religious teacher punishing a child for not complying with their religious practices?

If I am gender critical, then my child is gender critical until they choose otherwise and therefore cannot be forced into acting out another belief system.

This fringe ideology has been forced into schools, and must be forced out.

This isn't about individual names however, it's about naming conventions.

Calling a male teacher 'sir' in a school environment is a long established protocol, which no child should be told off for.

I think you’ll find it gives a good legal basis for OPs friend to point out that a male teacher is a man and he can’t compel students to not call him a man. Non binary is not a protected characteristic in any case.

Then the school have their responsibilities under PSED to balance equality for all the protected characteristics which is not achieved by prioritising that teachers wishes over facts for the children.

You need to contact the Daily Mail asap

Exactly. Don’t bring your indulgences into the school or any other workplace. It’s your hobby, not your right.

Poor kid! I would go nuclear on the school and the stupid teacher.